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“Would you leave your husband if he cheated on you?”
“If it was only once, I’d stay.”
“And if he hit you?”
“Oh, no. I am outta there. You hear me? Gone.”
“Only if it was once?”
“If he hits you once, he’ll hit you again.”
“If he cheated more than once?”
“I don’t know if I could stay, but I don’t know that I’d leave right away. We’d have to talk about it, go through some counseling. Work it out.”

This, my friends, is a composite conversation of overheard chats between women and a few I’ve had myself. I wondered about this discourse recently as the blogosphere swelled with commentary about Evelyn Lozada’s divorce filing from Chad Johnson. Upon learning that the couple was calling it quits after Johnson allegedly head-butted Lozada (she had reportedly confronted him about finding condom receipts), the Internet was replete with discussions on domestic abuse, the sanctity of marriage, and whether the boisterous “Basketball Wives” cast member had it coming.

Then there were the ostensibly apt Kim Kardashian comparisions: Lozada and Johnson’s union of 41 days trumped Kardashian’s 72-day marriage to NBA player Kris Humprhies, knocking it from the top spot of the shortest reality TV-boosted marriages in recent pop history. While viewers and Twitter pundits love the tabloid fodder for all its gloss and DVR-worthy glass throwing, I thought about how we common folk assess the value of marriage in our own lives.

“Quit comparing Evelyn to Kim Kardashian! Evelyn was abused ,” one Facebook friend chimed. It appeared that in the court of public opinion, Kardashian, who was fervent in her denial that Humphries ever abused her, didn’t have a “good enough” reason to leave her marriage after less than three months. As she told Oprah Winfrey in June, “You know when you just have that feeling that he’s the one? When we moved in, I had the feeling he was not the one.”

What if you know that he’s not the one for you? Some folks may not subscribe to the concept of kismet, while others don’t discount the “knowing.” (I’ll say that I’ve never talked to a long-term married couple about relationships without hearing a “When ya know, ya know” thrown into the conversation.) The reasons why a woman lets a relationship get to the altar without “knowing” that her betrothed is “the one” are as subjective and varied as the very concept as everyone having a “one.” In Kardashian’s case, she is a woman who is ready to drop an “I just want my fairy tale” in front of any interviewer and camera keeping up with her. Kismet conversations aside, perhaps when Kim realized that a multi-million dollar wedding did not make a fairy tale and that she would actually have to live with this guy, she decided to salvage her life from her hefty decision, schadenfreude-subscribing naysayers be damned. It all depressed her, she said. Leaving a marriage, no matter how brief and no matter how famous the couple, surely can’t be easy.

The alleged head-butting incident that led Lozada to seek a divorce lawyer caused a problematic chatter all its own. Never mind the 41-day marriage; some folk rendered the abuse karma for Lozada’s reality-flavored TV ruthlessness against other “Basketball Wives” cast members. Reminiscent of the dialogue surrounding the Rihanna-Chris Brown drama of 2009, the competing public narratives of  “Did she incite him?” and  “Why are we blaming the victim?” came to the surface once more. As the divorce news hit, I was expecting to hear digital applause, because a woman should leave an abusive marriage, right? Or is her filing just plain bad for the preservation of a holy union? Should she have stuck it out? Reading the comments of I-told-you-so finger waggers, I wondered this: How sacrosanct can a marriage be if your husband is head-butting you?

Going to the altar without being sure of your lifetime commitment (sans the clichéd cold feet and jitters), as with Kardashian and likely many other unnamed, non-famous women, is not ideal. And, not that the following is true in Evelyn’s case (because not one of us knows what really happened), it’s unlikely that abuse will cease just because your man puts a ring on it.

When does staying together trump the acknowledgement of our human foibles, the very ones that can often leave us dangerously in lust or committed to the hope that things will get better once we jump the broom? Does preserving the sanctity of marriage mean that you must stay bound not only to the man you married, but also to a poor choice?

I’d be remiss not to mention the idea of staying together for the kids. While neither Kardashian nor Humphries has children together, Johnson and Lozada each have children from previous relationships. Is staying together for the kids good for anyone, the kids included?

One thing I’m learning through pop culture watching, eavesdropping and chatting with my girlfriends is this: While marriage tethers a couple through “for better” and “for worse,” one woman’s “for worse” may constitute another’s absolute deal breaker.

Readers, I’m asking you like I’ve asked my friends: What reason is “good enough” to leave a marriage, and who decides that? How soon is too soon to dip out if you realize you shouldn’t have married him in the first place? What determines due diligence in keeping a marriage together? How bad does the “for worse” have to be before you bounce?

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Source: i4u.com

Breaking news, right? This is just one of many gems that came out of the highly suspect Kardashian interview that aired on OWN last night. Kim got Oprah to drink the Kardashian kool-aid by explaining that she’s now a changed woman—partially because of her disastrous 72-day marriage, she says. The other reason is the guy in the pic above.

The reality TV star stood by her declaration that she didn’t marry Kris Humphries for TV ratings, saying that the NBA player was a part of the “fairytale” that she always pictured for her life, but now it appears she’s writing a new story, courtesy of Kanye to the. Here’s what she said on OWN:

“I’m totally growing up. And even the people that I surround myself with, my friends or the people that I love to just sit and talk to and spend my time with are wiser, and a little bit older than me where before all my boyfriends were younger. I always dated five years younger. Now, I love that I am with someone that’s a couple years older than me. I love that my friends are even sometimes 20 or 30 years older than me and I can sit in their company and enjoy their experiences.  I feel like I’ve had an epiphany over the last year from what I’ve been through and I am a changed person through my own experiences.”

The interview ends with Oprah asking Kim if Kanye is her new fairytale, and of course the answer is left dangling in the wind to get viewers to tune back in next Sunday, but if I had to put something on her answer, I’d bet quite a bit that it’s a yes. Oh, and for the record, Kim’s 31 and Kanye’s 35. I’m wondering if one of those older friends she’s referring to is Jay-Z’s 42-year-old self.

Anyway, Kim and Oprah hit on a couple of other topics too like why she was on birth control at 14, the infamous sex tape that introduced her to the world, and the “deep depression” she says she went through after her divorce. Oprah also asked the whole gang how they feel about claims that their mother is pimping them out for money. Like good boys and girls, they responded that they’ve never felt exploited by mama Jenner. I guess.

Check out clips from part one of the special here. Do you think Kanye’s changed Kim?

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Tyler Perry has written a letter to his fans explaining why Kim Kardashian was given a role in his upcoming film, “The Marriage Counselor,” after receiving a ton of backlash over the casting choice. Tyler Perry already gets plenty of side eyes for his films, but his casting of the reality TV star tocuhed a nerve with many fans, especially after news of Kim’s divorce hit.

In looking over the letter, I’m not convinced this gesture will do anything to halt the grassroots boycott efforts that are popping up. He writes:

About two months ago, long before I even heard about Kim’s marriage or divorce, I was trying to finish up the casting. I said to one of my producers, “who else is out there that young people are looking up to?” One of my producers showed me pictures that his daughter had taken of several hundred kids lined up around the corner to get into a Kardashian store. They wanted to meet Kim. I thought, what better person! She literally has millions of young people following her. I thought and still do think, that it would be very responsible of her to be a part of this film. To have the young people that look up to her, see her in a film that is about, what happens in life when you make the wrong choices.

Tyler seems to equate teen’s fascination with Kim Kardashian with her being a role model and I think there is a thin line between the two. I’m not saying Kim is the worst person on the planet, but let’s not forget how she rose to fame in the first place. If you really want to teach young people what happens in life when you make the wrong choices, you don’t grant more fame to a chic who is in the media on a daily basis because of her sexcapades. That right there is a mixed message sir.

You can check out the full letter on theybf.com. What did you think about Kim Kardashian being cast in Tyler Perry’s latest film? Does this effort do anything to change your mind about seeing the film?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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by Ramona X

By now, we all know that Kim Kardashian expected to net $17 million from her fantabulous wedding to short-lived boyfriend Kris Humphries, file for divorce in order to get even more publicity for the season debut of Kim and Kourtney Take New York and expect her fans to not think anything of it. Just another day in her orchestrated, high profile public life, right?

Oh Kim, so wrong. You may have made more money in the past couple of months than you ever have in your four-year reality career, but your “brand” (yes – she is indeed a very profitable brand) has been severely and irreparably damaged. All the money that you could’ve made in the coming years by making us believe that you’re not faking your own life for the cameras has been slashed in half at the very least.

There’s no believing that Kim “married for love, not TV.” What makes it even worse is that her pimp and mother Kris Jenner denies she made a dime from the wedding. What?? Seriously! Talk about straight up lying and insulting our intelligence.

Although Kim was quick to say that she donated her wedding gifts to charity, there’s no way in heck we can ever believe that she didn’t make that $17 million from televising her big day. She may have made goo gobs of mula but has seriously damaged her reputation and CREDIBILITY.

Although many people saw the Kardashians as money-obsessed and fake, there were still a legion of fans that believed in their image as a fun and honest family. This whole divorce scenario just conveys how much of a hack Kim is – she orchestrated a high profile romance and wedding for the publicity and payday. Nobody is saying that she didn’t have feelings for her boo but the whole wedding and subsequent divorce reek of a scam. (Poor Kris Humphries – does he even know what’s going on)?
With all the backlash Kim is getting, she’s pleading for sympathy and saying that she’s surprised that so many are questioning her motives. You’d think with all the calculating going on in her momager’s office, they would’ve predicted this outcome. But, why am I surprised? Greed is blinding and therefore, Kim K can plead to not being in good health when she made such rash decisions. SMH

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On Monday, news broke about Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries’ split after a two and a half month union–72 days to be exact. In the divorce filing Queen Kim stated, “irreconcilable differences,” which we take to mean that the “Kim and Kris” reality show hasn’t been picked up by a major network as she hoped.

While ridiculously short, Kim’s sideshow marriage does its part to keep the divorce rate in America healthy. As far as celebrity couples go, this frivolous marriage comes from a long line of highly publicized weddings that are ultimately a waste of everyones time.

Fortunately celebrity couples heading to splitsville make wasting time quite entertaining. And believe it or not, Kim and Kris don’t have the shortest marriage in recent history. In honor of Kim Kardashian’s pending divorce, here are 7 celebrity marriages that failed just as quickly:

We know you are probably tired of the stream of news oozing from the truncated amputation of the Kris Humphries-Kim Kardashian marriage, but the details of this dramedy just keep getting better. This morning folks are buzzing over Kris Jenner’s claims that Kim and the rest of the Kardashian family “did not make a dime” off of her wedding to Kris Humphries.  Not even a dime? Really? Our sister site in celebrity gossip Necole Bitchie has this to say about this somewhat unbelievable assertion:

In the ‘side eye of the day’ files, Kim Kardashian’s mother Kris Jenner has been doing a radio tour to clear up any misconceptions about Kim’s recent divorce announcement while ironically promoting a book of her own titled ‘Kris Jenner And All Things Kardashian’. She stopped by The Sway In The Morning Show this morning and in an attempt to do damage control, she claims Kim didn’t make a dime off of her two part series and extravagant wedding despite reports that said Kim made at least 17 million. Not one dime? Riiiight.