All Articles Tagged "Iyanla Fix My Life"
If you caught the season premiere of Iyanla: Fix My Life Saturday night on OWN you already know during the episode Iyanla Vanzant laid into Love and Hip-Hop’s Erica Jean something terrible. Questioning the logic of sleeping with a man (Saigon) who didn’t even know her address, much less having a child with him, Iyanla gave her some straight “mommy talk” which some thought was a bit too harsh. When we had the chance to chat with the life coach about the explosive confrontation, she not only stood by her words during that episode, but also her previous commentary about Black women being out of order and needing to do better when it comes to their partner and parenting choices.
Check out the interview above, as well as Iyanla’s thoughts on the #BringBackOurGirls movement and the influx of domestic violence plaguing Hollywood headlines these days.
“You Slept With A Man Who Doesn’t Know Your Address” Iyanla With Saigon And Erica Of Love And Hip Hop
If you’ve watched just one scene with Saigon and Erica from the last season of “Love and Hip Hop New York,” you know their relationship is strained to say the least. One minute they aren’t speaking to each other. The next they’re moving in together trying to work on co-parenting their son and then next thing you know he’s cussing her out, calling her all type of obscenities on one of the VH1 reunion couches. If you didn’t see it…you can watch it here. It was quite terrible.
But judging by the way their relationship began, it’s not really surprising that they find themselves here today. On the show, Saigon and Erica revealed that they weren’t really in a relationship when she got pregnant. Instead, they were sleeping with one another casually when she decided she wanted to have a baby and for one reason or another Saigon agreed. The issue, of course, is that neither one of them knew each other but they’ll be in each other’s lives forever now because of their son.
I don’t know, at this point, what they want from one another, whether they’re working toward a romantic relationship or just want to be more amicable so they can co-parent their son. Whatever it is, they called in Iyanla Vanzant to help them deal with their situation. Saigon loves to turn up for the camera, so I’m sure their episode will make for some heated exchanges. But judging by this clip, Saigon and Erica won’t be the only ones bringing the drama.
In the video below Iyanla scolds both Saigon and Erica (but mostly Erica) about the actions that led to this very messy situation they find themselves in today. Here’s the transcript.
Iyanla: This is what happens when you have a baby with somebody that you don’t have a relationship with.
Erica: He’s saying he didn’t know where I lived, it’s a lie
Iyanla: Instead of saying that, you should be saying ‘Oh my God, what have I done here.’ That’s what you should be saying.
Erica: You’re absolutely right. But he…
Iyanla: But don’t make it about him! Own your stuff little girl, own it!
Iyanla: The shame of it, the embarrassment of it, that you slept with a man who doesn’t know your address and had his baby. Own that. Now, that’s some mommy talk for you. ‘Cause as long as you pointing at him, you ain’t cleaning up your stuff.”
Take a look at the video and let us know what you think.
Do you think Iyanla was too hard on Erica? Will you tune in for this episode? Saigon and Erica’s episode, “Fix My Celebrity Parenting Nightmare” airs on Saturday, May 10 at 9pm on OWN.
Three months ago we covered an update on Erica Jean and Saigon’s relationship post-”Love and Hip-Hop New York.” As we saw on the VH1 reality show, the couple had a tumultuous relationship. Instead of allowing their drama to infiltrate co-parenting their son, Brian, the couple enlisted the help Iyanla Vanzant. Both Erica Jean and Saigon will appear in the premiere of OWN’s newest season of”Fix My Life” May 10. In the preview Saigon notes:
“Ya’ll know I couldn’t let the story end like that. Check out both sides of the story on ‘Iyanla: Fix My Life.’ This show isn’t about yelling and screaming. It’s about the facts.”
Saigon seemed especially excited to meet with the 60-year-old life coach to resolve the issues he has with Erica Jean. Their episode will debut on May 10 at 9 p.m. est.
Check out the clip of Erica Jean And Saigon On “Iyanla: Fix My Life” below. Will you be tuning in?
There certainly wasn’t enough time for Mo’Nique to even begin to sort through the issues shared between tumultuous duo Saigon and Erica Jean during the “Love & Hip Hop” reunion show taping. Thankfully, OWN star Iyanla Vanzant has decided to take the pair under her wing while helping them to resolve their issues so that they can become better co-parents to their son, Brian. Luckily for us, we get to see it all unfold on television. Saigon recently announced via Instagram that he and Erica will be appearing on the new season of “Iyanla: Fix My Life.”
“Ya’ll know I couldn’t let the story end like that,” he wrote. “Check out both sides of the story on ‘Iyanla: Fix My Life.’ This show isn’t about yelling and screaming. It’s about the facts.”
Well, if any one can get to the bottom of their drama, it’s definitely Iyanla. And Saigon seems very excited about connecting with the 60-year-old life coach. He also shared a photo of her where he thanked God for being able to encounter such a person.
“Thank God for this beautiful black “woman”… Not female, “woman.” You know, those who RESPECT themselves…She is DEF what we needed. HBO, VH1 and now Oprah Network. Follow my moves… I couldn’t write my life story if I tried.. Maybe I should.. Hmmmmm.”
We’ll certainly be tuning in to see how this story unfolds. Will you?
Most of us, if not all love us some Iyanla Vanzant. Besides her many accolades, she is a free therapist for us all via her Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN) show, Fix My Life. Two weeks ago on the show, Iyanla counseled two sisters from San Antonio who had a deep rift between them. Their anger stemmed from traumatizing episodes during their teenage years. As OWN reports:
Iyanla has traveled to San Antonio to meet two sisters in crisis, Barbara and Geneva. Barbara grew up affluently with her aunt and uncle. Geneva was raised by their mother in poverty. At 17, Barbara invited her younger sister to come live with her, but a rift formed between the sisters after Barbara learned Geneva was sleeping with Barbara’s boyfriend, who fathered two of Geneva’s four children. Now, Iyanla wants to get Geneva’s side of the story. Watch as she shares a family secret with Iyanla and opens up about what her sister taught her about being a woman.
During the clip, Geneva confesses to Vanzant that Barbara’s boyfriend would fondle her and coerce her into having sexual intercourse. Despite telling her sister about the rape, Geneva stated Barbara did not believe her. As their sexual relationship progressed, the boyfriend would give gifts and money to Geneva. Unfortunately, during the clip Vanzant did not believe Geneva had been assaulted, instead she told Geneva she was “h-eing”. Her claim on Geneva’s juxtaposition was based on the belief that Geneva accepted the money and gifts from the boyfriend. Vanzant asked: “Did her boyfriend give you money to lay up with him?” When Geneva said “yes,” Vanzant looked upon her disapprovingly.
Although Vanzant is filled with tough-love, her response to Geneva was surprising. Perhaps it was because Geneva became pregnant with her first child at 14 and had two children with Barbara’s boyfriend that Vanzant was disappointed, but her reaction was read as slut-shamming by many media outlets. It seemed to be implied that because of Geneva’s history she knew what she was doing with her sister’s boyfriend. But as we also know, your sexual history should never be an example of how people can treat you. The age of Barbara’s boyfriend was not revealed but he was older than Geneva when he began to have sex with her while she was 16 years old. Geneva also claims Barbara taught her how to be a woman by only dating men who could provide financially for her. Geneva’s history has not given her a healthy perception of relationships but she should not have been accused of “h-eing” especially if she was taught a certain type of behavior in order to survive her living environment.
Check out the Fix My Life clip below. Do you think Iyanla slut shamed Geneva?
From Hello Beautiful
Each week on “Iyanla: Fix My Life” we watch Iyanla Vanzant help celebrities and everyday people overcome their personal struggles to live a better life. But, on an upcoming episode of the hit OWN series, we get a glimpse in the spiritual life coach’s personal story of survival.
In a new promo clip, Iyanla shares her experience of living through domestic violence with guest Janetria.
“After I got hit in my head with a bed slat, I woke up at three o’clock in the morning and something said to me, ‘If you don’t leave here now, he’s going to kill you,’” she said. “And I creeped out of the bed and I got a bag of clothes for each of my kids and one for me. And I left.”
“I had nowhere to go, I had no money to get there — I didn’t even care,” she continued. “But I had to be willing to lose everything to gain it all.”
Read more at HelloBeautiful.com
T.O. Says He Found Out His Childhood Neighbor Was His Estranged Dad After He Tried To Date His Sister
If you were out on the town enjoying your Saturday evening, you missed out on the season premiere of Iyanla: Fix My Life, which was a very emotional, if not heartbreaking episode with enough family secrets to make your relatives look like the Brady Bunch.
Despite all the issues folks have with Terrell Owens, it’s clear that a lot of his past behavior and controversy has a lot to do with his childhood, which was NOT a good one. After his mother gave birth to him at 17 after being impregnated by a married man much older, Owens was sent to live with his grandmother, whom he says never told him, “I love you.” And if that wasn’t enough, T.O.’s father wasn’t present in his life. While speaking with Iyanla, Owens opened up about finally meeting his father after he started having a crush on one of the girls who lived across the street from his grandmother’s house. When the two seemed to be getting too close, the father of the house, LC Russell, intervened and told him that Owens couldn’t date his daughter because she was actually his sister–and Mr. Russell was HIS father. All this happened at the age of 11.
I think anybody that was watching probably had their jaw drop at such a revelation, and eventually, Iyanla was able to get father and son together to talk, and Owens let his dad know that his heart had been broken by his absence (especially since the man lived across the street with his wife and children, but wasn’t physically there for T.O.).
“I think everything that has happened to me…I’ve been a product of my environment. I knew I wasn’t happy inside, but I always played it off. I put a smile on my face when I knew I was hurting and I was sad inside. Even in relationships that I had with women, I really didn’t know how to have a relationship with them. Those are things that I know I probably should have been taught as a kid and I never was. I guess the question I should have asked years ago was, ‘Why wasn’t I told?’ Why did it take me to have an interest in my sister, a liking to my sister, for me to know who my dad was?
For me to live across the street and know that you were my dad and know that on that side of the street you had kids, you had a wife. That was a family and I wasn’t apart of that. I couldn’t understand or wrap my brain around why I was across the street and wasn’t apart of that. My mom was elsewhere and I’m staying with my grandmother and I didn’t have a dad.”
His father, Mr. Russell, responded by saying that he just didn’t know the right time to open up to Owens:
“Sometimes waiting on the right time goes a little further than, you know waiting on that right time to tell you. That’s the way it came out. It could have been sooner. It should have been sooner.
I was married. I couldn’t do what I wanted to do. I would like to have taken him fishing or to ball games. I have two outside kids so I had to work two jobs. I worked two jobs for 19 years to take care of them.”
Iyanla went on to say that part of Owens’ struggles to be there for his four children is because of the betrayal he dealt with as a child and not knowing Mr. Russell in his life. During the follow-up at the end of the episode, Owens said that he has been more in communication with his kids and is focused on building a career outside of football, and he’s also trying to build some kind of relationship with his estranged father. Really sad stuff folks…
Check out T.O.’s confrontation with his dad and his mother as he talks about making such a terrible discovery about his parents as a kid on the next page, and share your thoughts below.
As the next season of “Iyanla Fix My Life” is set to air this Sunday, November 3, we had the opportunity to sit down one more time with Iyanla Vanzant and pick her brain about a few more things. We spoke to her about the tendency of black families to keep secrets, why black men specifically are hesitant about seeking therapy or asking for help.
And then she spoke specifically about her upcoming episode with Terrell Owens. I’ve seen the episode and I have to say that it’s a lot to process. Seeing where he comes from and what he had to endure explains a lot about the current state he currently finds himself. A lot of drama and a lot of admissions came to the surface in this episode so we asked what does she feel allowed Terrell and his family to open up. She said:
“I think Terrell, the pain he was experiencing was greater than his fear of being exposed.”
We know Iyanla works with a lot of different people with a lot of issues that have us shedding tears at home. We wondered if she ever finds that she takes the problems of her clients home with her. She said:
“Most of what I see, I’ve already healed. Because it’s only one of three things, somebody’s not feeling loved. I’ve healed that. Somebody’s not feeling heard or seen and they’re acting out. I’ve healed that. And somebody hasn’t forgiven. I do that everyday.”
Check out the entire conversation below.
Last year, we watched Iyanla: Fix My Life and had the chance to learn more about the life, the struggles, and the return of actress Maia Campbell. The former In The House star was trying to get back on her feet after battling a hard drug addiction (including crystal meth) and dealing with her own bipolar disorder. Those issues played a part in Campbell’s strained relationship with her daughter Elizabeth. But on the program, mother and daughter came together to hash things out since Elizabeth was living with her father and didn’t have a good relationship with Campbell after she lost custody. But since that episode has aired, Campbell has been doing so much better and says that she’s been staying clean for her daughter. As far as their relationship, things are improving, and she says that her daughter is interested in becoming an actress like her. Check out what she had to say in an interview with iPower Richmond 92.1′s TT Torrez:
Her Daughter’s Impact And Making A Comeback:
“I’ve made some mistakes. I had to make a turnaround in my life. This is my new expression to the world and this is my comeback and this is my moment. This is my chance to say, ‘This is what God made of me, I’m still worthy.’ If I was a one hundred dollar bill, and I was all messed up, someone would clean me up and use me. I’m still worth something!
I have a daughter now and I have to set an example. That was what got me grounded in trying to do better. I have to live my life differently. I have to change the way I was living my life. I can’t live my life so far away from the positive things that kept me rooted.”
When She Realized Her Live Was Spiraling Out Of Control:
“It was the using and the self-hatred and the arguing with my family–just running away. You’re supposed to be doing something better for yourself than just running away. I was young. It was various [drugs]. And I’ve been clean for four years, and I’ve been taking care of myself. The best thing I can do is stay working, stay on the right path and stay away from all that.”
Dealing With Negativity From Those Who Might Not Want To Work With Her Again:
“I’ve learned that there are some true believers. I have true friends everywhere and I have a true friend in God, and I have a true friend in me. So it doesn’t matter who in the flesh wants to deny me. Jesus had people who denied him. You can support your own means and say, ‘this is what I stand for.’ This is basically the statement I’m making with my life.”
Elizabeth’s Aspirations To Act:
“She wants to be an actress and she’s done some Disney commercials recently and some other acting and some videos on YouTube. She doesn’t listen to any other people as far as management. She’s listening to her father. And she doesn’t have any agent yet. She’s not exactly on a show because she hasn’t gotten the training yet. When she gets the training, she’ll probably pop onto something a little more lucrative, I’ll be proud to sit by her and support her.”
Glad to hear that things are looking up for Maia and her daughter, and hopefully we’ll see mom on TV again real soon sharing her talents. Check out her full interview on the next page and let us know what you think.
Iyanla went to Alabama to help Terrell confront issues from the past that negatively affect his current relationships, (We hope they mean the ones with his multiple baby mamas and their children.) career and his life.
During the show, Terrell reveals that he had a painful childhood where he rarely saw his mother and didn’t even know the identity of his father. By the end of the episode Terrell recognizes his negative behavior stems from the abandonment he felt as a child.
But you know Iyanla. She’s not going to allow Terrell to blame all of his indiscretions on his past. She also asks that he takes responsibility for his actions.
Check out the a preview from the episode below.
Don’t miss the return of Iyanla: Fix My Life on Saturday, November 2, at 9/8c.