All Articles Tagged "getting dumped"
If you’ve ever been dumped and didn’t see it coming at all, maybe that’s because it wasn’t coming…until you did something inexcusable. There are a few behaviors on which men have a zero tolerance policy. These are things that, once a person does them, they tell you exactly what they’re about.
There’s a huge difference between a mistake and a major flaw, and there are some things that people rarely do just once. So once you do one of these in a relationship, it tells your partner there is more to come. And he doesn’t want it. You can run a little late, forget to text back or leave dirty dishes in the sink. But these are things that there is no coming back from. Here are 15 things that will make a man break up with you on the spot.
The moments immediately after we are dumped are never our best moments. Those times in movies where people are dumped and go on to behave all noble and stoic—those don’t really happen. When you’re dumped, you’re overwhelmed by several emotions that you were not prepared for. And when we’re not prepared for a storm of emotions, we do not handle them well. We usually end up behaving petty, saying something desperate, lashing out in anger, or just in general acting very uncool. That’s okay. We’ve all been there. But it takes a special line of crazy to act really immature after being dumped. There are some actions you cannot blame on being overwhelmed by emotion. There are some actions that take planning, consideration, and a lot of crazy. Here are the most immature ways to respond to being dumped.
Although I hate to admit, I have been dumped a couple of times. Quite honestly, I don’t know too many people that haven’t been. It hurt like hell and left me wondering, “What did I do wrong?” Maturity has led me to realize that getting dumped probably wasn’t about me at all.
A wise friend once asked me who the most important person in my life was. At the time, I replied, “I would have to say my Mom.” He corrected me and said, “No, you are the most important person in your life.” It took me a minute to get where he was coming from, but following a further discussion I realized he was correct. At first, it may seem self-centered, but it really is very logical. Everything you do is about you even if you are doing something for someone else. It is about your choices, your beliefs, your desires, etc. Every action you take in life and every decision you make is rooted in your personal experience, which is why you are the most important person in your life.
Conceptually, I believe this is easier to digest for non-parents as good parents often put their kids first. Nevertheless, it holds true. If you don’t take care of yourself first then, you won’t be able to take care of your kids. Your very desire to put your kids first is all about your understanding and expectations of what it means to be a good parent and the same applies to relationships. We have all dated people who seemed like the perfect person on paper, but just for somebody else. And, ultimately, it wasn’t that they weren’t great it was that they just weren’t for you.
Read more on why Author Nathan Hale Williams says you shouldn’t take getting dumped so personally on Essence.
As the old saying goes, “breaking up is hard to do” … especially if you’re on the receiving end of a breakup. If you’re the one ending the relationship, compassion is key. With that in mind, here are five ways you should never choose to end a relationship:
1. A hired hand. Some people ask a friend to do their dirty work for them, but having a friend tell your signiicant other that it’s over is incredibly cowardly. Do it yourself and deal with the backlash that comes with it like an adult.
Check out the other four ways on YourTango.com.
When I was in high school, one of my favorite teachers told me that nothing worthwhile is easily attained. And I believed it — except when it came to men.
High school was a land of plenty for me. In my sophomore year, I began dating a series of quirky, heartfelt boys, each one something straight out of a John Hughes movie. There were lots of burned CDs, late-night make-out sessions and outside-the-box love notes. One boyfriend placed a Ziploc bag of red liquid in a heart-shaped container lined with handwritten poems comparing me to ventricles and the aorta. It was kind of creative, very creepy and totally romantic.
I was drunk on my newfound power. Why bask in the adoration of one guy, I thought, when there were at least two others who were also interested and waiting in the sidelines? “Boys, please! There’s plenty of me to go around.” My ego was off the charts.
Read the rest of this story on YourTango.com.
Most people would like to be the one who puts an end to a bad relationship rather than being dumped by their loved one. But the fact is that, even if you want to end your relationship, it’s not easy to tell someone that it’s over. That’s right, essentially breaking up is a lose-lose situation. Breaking up with your partner may be necessary at some point but let it have the dignity that your relationship did.
Ending a relationship is all the more difficult when it is not by mutual consent. When one of the partners has to initiate the break in the relationship, it can turn into a situation filled with anger, sadness, confusion and frustration and therefore must be handled with care and lots of thought. Here are 7 tips that might help you along the way to a peaceful break-up.
Pop-culture loves to push the image of the scorned ex who breaks car windows (ahem, thank you Jazmine Sullivan) or the sad one who weeps into a pint of Ben and Jerry’s to nurse her pain. However, there are far more productive ways to deal with the hurt of a break-up without landing yourself in jail or gaining 40 pounds. Here are some tips for coping with the loss of a relationship the healthy way.