I started my current relationship while unemployed and in graduate school. At that time, I was near the end of the second year of nearly three years looking for a job after being laid off.

I suppose I should count my lucky stars and stripes that my partner thought me worthy enough to keep things moving, as many women aren’t keen on starting down a path with a man subsisting primarily off of federal aid. Given that she was employed, she often found herself shouldering the financial burden during several of our outings; While not conservative, she’s traditional enough to prefer playing her “role,” as it were.

Over a year later, the tables have turned: I’m now working full-time in a new career and she is working part-time, in search of gainful employment. Only now our relationship is more significant since we’ve left the courtship stage and have finally moved in together. As the primary breadwinner, I have to, at times, consider and help cover bills that she can’t pay on her own; grocery shopping and evenings out are financial onuses that typically come to me nowadays.

To say it’s an adjustment is putting it pretty mildly. Ever since graduating from college seven years ago, I’ve lived alone and have become used to what little paper I’ve had and earned being my own. There’s a good reason I’ve been so averse to having any little crumb snatchers (aka, children) anytime soon…because I don’t want them snatching my crumbs.

Of course, it’s also an added pressure for her: for a strong-minded, college-educated woman, dealing with asking for help or financial assistance is challenging. I realize this because I’m exactly the same way. When I got laid off, the most agonizing thing for me to do was ask others for money. I dreaded the thought of asking my parents for money, and I would rather have sold my last pair of hole-laden boxers before I ever asked a friend, or…ugh…a woman I was dating.

The experience has been a learning one for me about how to give back to others, albeit a rough one. I had to learn through a couple of small battles to give before waiting to be asked for money, and not to raise a stink about paying for a somewhat expensive meal–especially when I actually have the money to spend on doing so.

It’s also a good test run to having kids who will happily seek to bleed me monetarily until I’m ready to be placed on the spit. We want to have at least one little bugger someday, so I should just consider this s*** right now as practice.

Getting used to this lifestyle has been one of my biggest personal areas of growth; being forced through what feels like poverty (but isn’t quite really) is one of those things that helps any couple, if not any individual, to grow. She said to me the other night that we’ll never be as poor again as we are right now. Hopefully she’s right, but if she isn’t, I’ll start getting prepared now.

(New York Times) — One of the best things about being around preschool-age children is that they are a blank slate awaiting your imprint. All of the big questions come up before first grade — God and death, jail and fairies — and most 4-year-olds will believe pretty much any answer you give them.  Until recently, however, few people made much effort to get children this age to think hard about money. Why go all pecuniary on a child who has barely mastered counting?  In the wake of the financial crisis, however, and the realization that individuals share at least some blame for the bubbles, a number of people and organizations have taken up the cause of helping the next generation of grown-ups form better habits at an earlier age. The JumpStart Coalition for Personal Financial Literacyrecently expanded its target age group to include the pre-kindergarten set. A new book called “Pretty Penny Sets Up Shop” tells the story of a young girl who sets up a “small mall” in her grandmother’s attic to pay for her grandmother’s surprise party.

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I know our parents always stress to us that we must take responsibility for our actions and never to place blame on others. But when it comes to being financially responsible, the fact still remains that there aren’ t any required courses taught in high school or college about personal finances. When young adults are making the transition into adulthood most of them are clueless about how to manage their money, so they learn by trial and error. In order to avoid some costly mistakes the following are 7 ways a Young Adult can become more Financially Responsible.

1 . Discipline Yourself
Most financial mismanagement comes from being impatient and the need for instant gratification. The sooner you learn the art of discipline the sooner you will be able to get your finances together. Instead of using credit cards for everyday purchases, learn to save and budget for the things you need and only use credit cards for emergencies. The money you will save on interest alone will be well worth the wait.

2 . Make Your Own Financial Decisions
It is imperative that you learn how to manage your own money. Relying too much on others (Especially your parents) will cause you financial harm for sure. You know the saying …Give a man a fish and he’ ll eat for a day but teach a man
how to fish and he’ ll eat forever… That’ s what you want to do… Eat forever!

Too often our parents, uncles, aunts, cousins and friends give us advice based on their situation or experiences and because we don’ t know any better we listen. Their advice is never ill-intentioned but you also know the other saying …what’ s good for the goose isn’ t always good for the gander. Instead of relying on their advice, take control and read as much as possible; start with a few basic books on personal finance. Once you are equipped, don’ t allow anyone to throw you off track of your financial destination! (This includes your significant other as well. It is a fact that most frivolous spending comes from people trying to impress their loved ones).

3 . Keep a Spending Journal
Once you start making your own financial decisions and have equipped yourself with some personal finance knowledge via your new book collection you’ ll start to realize the importance of budgeting, the difference between a need and a want, and small ways to cut back your consumption to make sure you are saving more and meeting your financial obligations. Before you can stop the money leaks you must first figure out where they are. Begin by writing down where you spend your money daily. Doing this will open your eyes to where most of your money is going. Doing this will give you clear direction of where you are and where you are going.