All Articles Tagged "father"
Sir, Who Asked You? Chris Brown’s Dad Talks About Why He Doesn’t Think Chris & Rihanna Should Be Together
Well, apparently, somebody asked this man to open his mouth.
The NY Daily News caught up to Chris Brown’s dad, Clinton, to talk to him about his son and Rihanna’s relationship. Seeing as though we’ve never heard much from him in the past, you know he took every opportunity to chat it up.
When asked about the twosome, Brown said:
“I personally really didn’t want him and Rihanna back together. You have to have a balance in a relationship. You have to have someone who is spontaneous and whimsical but you also have to have someone who is grounded and logical.”
You know, it’s not that what he’s saying is incorrect but why even talk about it? I get it, everyone else has publicly had their say so why not Papa Brown? But by now, he should know that neither Chris nor Rihanna care about what people say about their relationship.
Clinton also added that his pick for his son would have been Jordin Sparks who he called a “wholesome young lady” who’s also very pretty. A few years ago, Jordin would have agreed with him because she had quite the crush on him for a long time.
Thankfully, he didn’t “down” Rihanna. He said he met her a few years ago during the first go ’round of “Chrianna” and said she was very respectful and polite. Still, he just feels like his son could have moved on from her and found someone better.
I wonder if Chris or Rihanna will respond to this story. Neither of them is known for staying quiet when someone has something to say about them.
What do you think? Should Chris’ father just have stayed quiet about this whole thing, especially since the “talk” has died down a lot?
The Drama You Want, is the Drama You Won’t Get! How To Handle The Negative Reaction Negative People Want To Get Out Of You
Do men really desire a drama free relationship, even if the relationship is casual? Or, do men like drama from women on a certain level? A few years ago, I was blessed with one of the smallest and greatest gifts known to mankind by giving birth to my son. Not only was I blessed with this gift, but I was given a long-awaited title of mom. While I was blessed with the gift of my son and the privileged title of mom, I also had the burden of encountering confusion, unnecessary drama and a lack of respect from the father of my child. From the day my son was born, his father constantly did and said things that infuriated me, brought me to tears and damaged my self-esteem. He would always try his best to break me down, rather than lift me up. Oftentimes I wondered why he would do such a thing, especially now that I had given birth to our child (because of course everything was fine before our son was born). Then I finally realized that he wanted a drama filled reaction out of me so he could say that he had a typical “baby mamma” that came with the expected drama. Once I realized what he was doing, I stepped back and told myself that I would not react foolishly (not that I ever did) to any of his negative comments or actions towards me and our child because I realized that I could not waste my precious time reacting to him and wasting energy when I had a child to care for. I decided that I would be stern with him, but I would no longer be attitudinal or irate with him. I also realized that the more I responded to him negatively, the more mental power I gave him over me. So after consciously deciding to stop reacting negatively to his actions and feeding into him, my life became more peaceful; and to my surprise, he was more enraged and upset with my positive actions or non-reactions. He eventually figured out that I was not going to react out of pocket towards him anymore, so he stopped for a while. To this day, he still tries to get a rise out of me, but his antics don’t work.
After I realized that my son’s father wanted a drama-filled relationship, I thought to myself…WHY? Why would any man want a relationship with a woman that is a 24/7 headache? Then I realized that unfortunately, this is what some men want because they get a rise out of it and they just like women with a little extra fire in their bones. I also came to the sad conclusion that some men are simply used to having relationships with women who like to perform dramatically because it is what they are used to. Now, some women may say that the men they are involved in relationships with make them behave in a certain manner. This may be true to some extent because oftentimes, when something doesn’t go the way it was anticipated, we allow our emotions to get the best of us, and we instantly react without thinking. However, it is always better to walk away from a person and a situation before you allow it to get the best of you. My relationship with my son’s father taught me some valuable lessons, but the most valuable lesson I learned is not to allow someone to take me out of my character as a woman. This lesson is a simple, commonsense one that is known, but it is often overlooked and not applied. With learning this lesson, I also had to learn how to put aside my ego and control my emotions. Putting aside my ego and controlling my emotions allowed me to listen to the person and filter through what they were saying and how they were reacting, giving me the advantage when I responded because I gathered all information needed to render a calm, intelligent response…which in turn angered them, insulted their pride, or caused them to back down and apologize. How and why do I put aside my ego and control my emotions? I pray and ask God to show me how He wants me to handle situations, and every time I do He shows me. The drama my son’s father wanted out of me was something I refused to give him. In fact, the drama that anyone wants me to give them is something I refuse to give because a moment of drama is not worth me laying aside the woman I am. What would it prove? Nothing. How would I benefit from it? I wouldn’t. Is it worth it? Not at all. Maintaining your character is worth more than a moment of ego driven drama. Let it go and let God.
Liz Lampkin is the Author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin.
Halle Berry isn’t the only 45-plus person in Hollywood becoming a parent. More than ever before, men are fathering children later in life. Be it they are more financially stable, starting a new love relationship or finally expecting with their partner after years of trying, it seems to be the new norm. Fatherhood is about loving your child and being there for them through thick and thin, and we wonder if these 15 celebs have ever done mental calculations for milestones, you know graduation, marriage, first grandbaby etc. Only time will tell, but for now they seem to enjoy being dads instead of granddads.
We know all parents aren’t this understanding but this story is really touching.
FCKH8.com, a website that sells t-shirts to spread love across all sexualities (in their words, they “fight homo-h8), posted a very sweet letter on Friday morning on their Facebook page that epitomized love. In the letter, an unidentified father told his son, Nate, that he’d overheard a phone conversation about his plans to come out to his dad. In surprising fashion, his dad totally took the pressure off his son.
In the note, he said:
I’ve known you were gay since you were six. I’ve loved you since you were born.”
The dad also added that he thinks his son and Mike, the guy he was on the phone with, make a cute couple.
Well…anybody have a smile on their face right now? Need a Kleenex? We aren’t sure how old Nate is (he’s apparently in school as his dad told him to plan to bring home oj and bread after class) but as many in the LGBT community will tell you, it isn’t always the easiest thing in the world to come out to friends and family members. Some parents are especially hard to tell because some of them have certain life “expectations” for their children and can’t see that being gay, lesbian or bisexual doesn’t necessarily stop those things from happening.
I’m sure Nate took a huge sigh of relief after reading that note.
Do you think or hope you’d be this open if you overheard your child having this type of conversation?
After months of waiting, Beyoncé’s documentary, Beyoncé: Life Is But A Dream, is finally premiering tonight on HBO. Oh, and Oprah threw the fans and stans an even bigger bone when she revealed last weekend that she would be interviewing Bey and it would also air tonight, an hour before the documentary. That’s pretty much Bey overload, right? Well, here’s the thing: because we know that “Beyoncé” is a brand and a bit of a machine, there have been some things that she’s managed to avoid talking about. But tonight, we want answers! Even if you aren’t a big fan, you’ve probably heard some things about her that have piqued your interest and you’d like to hear what she has to say too. So check out some of the things we’re hoping Bey addresses – if the interview and documentary are no holds barred.
In light of the murder-suicide by Kansas City Chiefs linebacker Jovan Belcher of his girlfriend, Kasandra Perkins, and himself, the National Football League is stepping in to provide financial assistance to the couple’s now-orphaned child. The league has agreed to pay for funeral arrangements and provide their three-month-old daughter, Zoey, with at least $1 million throughout her life span.
According to TMZ, the NFL agreed to pay for funeral arrangements to relieve the families from massive funeral and memorial service bills.
Baby Zoey, who is now in the custody of the Belcher family, will be taken care of through the league’s Surviving Child Benefit and health care plan. According to USA Today, she will receive $9,000 a month for the next four years and at least $4,000 a month until she turns 18, or 23 if she decides to go to college.
You can get the story in its entirety over at ESSENCE.
“Deadbeat” isn’t even the right word.
In the great state of Tennessee, three men have provided sperm for 78 children by 46 different women.
How do they pay child support for all of those kids they “fathered”? They don’t.
In a story that just makes black people look bad, Mail Online records the “Deadbeat Dad Roundup:”
- Desmond Hatchett, 33, of Knoxville, has 30 children by 11 different women. (You remember him, right?) He asked for his child support payments to be reduced – even though his paycheck stretched to just $1.49 per child per month. He holds a county record for his number of children and is currently in jail for aggravated assault. He told Fox2Now.com: “I had four kids in the same year. Twice.” He said he does manage to remember all their names, ages and birth dates. Hatchett first appeared in court on missing child support charges in 2009, when he had 21 children. He said he would not father any more – but has had nine more in the past three years. ”I didn’t intend to have this many, it just happened,” he said.
- Richard M. Colbert from Memphis has 25 children by 18 different women. He claims he does not have to pay for any of them as they are all adults. He added, he feels lucky. “Everybody’s not able to have children.” Another man who shares his name said he regularly gets calls from women and children asking for money.
- Terry Tyrone Turnage, also of Memphis, has 23 children by 17 women. He recently filed a petition in court to lower his child payments but never turned up for the hearing. One mother said he had been ordered to pay $279 a month – but the most she had ever seen was $9.
Of course, no woman in her right mind would have a kid with a man who already has children in the double digits. Latoya Shields, one of Turnage’s many babies’ mothers, told WREG in Memphis that she was “floored” when the prosecutor told her that Turnage had 20 children. She says that, though she spent eight years with him, she thought he only had four children.
Now, I can’t imagine what the warnings signs would have been, but I have to believe they were there. Her child was his twenty-first child and he had two more kids by other women after that! She had to know something. I think she was living in denial. LaToya said Turnage was supposed to pay her $259 a month, but the most she has seen is $9 as well.
Attorney Warren Campbell told Action News 5 if a person does not pay child support, the state ends up paying and there is no legal way to stop people from having children.
So many questions remain: Why did so many people choose to have unprotected sex with these men in such a short period of time? Are we going to hear about an AIDS epidemic in Tennessee and be able to track it back to these three men? Do Colbert’s 25 adult children know each other? Did the judge laugh in these men’s faces when they asked for a break on child support?
You would think in a day and age where condoms can be had easier than a stick of gum that people wouldn’t still be getting pregnant willy-nilly by men they barely know.
LaToya said all she wants is for her daughter to know her father. I’m sure the other mothers are telling her to get in line.
Alissa Henry is a freelance writer living in Columbus, OH. Follow her on Twitter @AlissaInPink
More on Madame Noire!
- Can We Stop the Black Male Bashing…At Least on Father’s Day?
- Being Selfish or Being Sensible? What’s So Wrong With Not Wanting To Have Children?
- Looking Within: Am I A Match For The Ideal Man I Am Praying For?
- OOoo Girl, No! 6 Hair Mistakes You Need Not Make
- Don’t Be His Fool, or His Doormat: Excuses Women Need to Stop Making For Men
- In Summer Fashion, White Is The New Black: 6 White Pieces for Your Wardrobe
- You Could’ve Kept That: 9 Movie Remakes and Sequels That Shouldn’t Have Seen the Light of Day
This post only applies to single mothers who were never married and find themselves on an emotional rollercoaster with the father of their child or children. It is intended to be the swift kick in the behind your family and friends have been trying to give you for the better for months—maybe even years.
Most women do not plan or desire to hold the baby-mama title. But, with a 73 percent out-of-wedlock birthrate, nearly three-fourths of black mothers fit the mold. That makes the handling of “baby-daddies” a real issue in our community. Sex is generally an emotional act for women and those emotions are often magnified during pregnancy and continue into motherhood. And what is a hormonally complicated time becomes more emotionally complex when the situation gets real—he’s with other women, he’s too busy to visit more than a few times a month, he’s maybe even hoping you might go for an abortion–the list goes on.
Angry, confused, desperate—some single mothers entertain foolishness that only ends up eating away at their self-worth and esteem in the end.
So to save yourself (or a friend) from further heartache and/or catching a case, here are eight of the biggest mistakes to avoid:
I’m sure you’ve heard the rumors by now that Robert Kardashian isn’t really Khloe’s biological father, and for the most part the talk seemed completely baseless—except for the fact that Khloe looks a lot different from her sisters Kim and Kourtney. But now photos show that she looks a lot like Alex Roldan, the man who is speculated to be her real biological dad.
The eyes, the nose, the lips–they all bear a striking resemblance, and it doesn’t help that her mother, Kris, admitted to having an affair around the time Khloe was conceived. Plus, Khloe’s middle name is Alexandra. Still it’s all circumstantial, aside from remarks from two of Robert’s ex-wives who have spoken out, saying their ex-husband was unsure of Khloe’s paternity.
What’s worse is reports say Khloe already knows Alex, a hairdresser in West Hollywood who has been cutting Kris’ hair for 30 years, is her real father and Kris wants to introduce him as a surprise plot on a “special episode” of one of the Kardashian shows. As sad as that sounds, that’s right up Kris’ alley.
I really like Khloe so I hope she’s handling the news well if it is in fact true. But Kris wanting to profit off of this is just so… Kardashian like.
What do you think about this rumor? Do you think these pics are pretty good evidence that Khloe is Alex’s daughter?
Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.
More on Madame Noire!
- Things Black Mothers Say
- Celebrity Mistresses: The Good, The Bad, and The Trifling
- 7 Curl Defining Products to Get Your Curls and Coils Poppin’
- How to Attract a Healthy Relationship This Year
- 6 Ways to Tackle Relationship Arguments
- He Loves Me: Men Who Just Adore Their Wives
- Evening Eye Candy: Larenz Tate
Uhhh. I imagine that’s the sound Rick Ross made when he was served papers alleging he fathered a 3-year-old boy in Georgia.
According to TMZ, 36-year-old Tyrisha Childers filed a paternity suit in Broward County claiming Rick Ross fathered her son a few years ago and hasn’t paid any child support. As these allegations usually go, Tyrisha is a “destitute” mother with zero income, aside from receiving $694 a month in disability payments, and she claims she has absolutely no money in the bank.
The boss isn’t having it though. He filed papers of his own saying he never even slept with Tyrisha, and certainly didn’t father her child, and he plans on proving it with a DNA test. That should settle things pretty quickly.
This sounds like a Justin Bieber situation, but you never really know with rappers. Still, why would you wait three years to file papers if he really is the father?
Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.
More on Madame Noire!
- For the Cool in You: Classic & Kooky Leather Jackets You’ll Love
- Terribly Tatted Up: When Celebrities Get Ratchet Tattoos for the Ones They Love
- Style Icon: Tina Turner
- Stereotypes That Black People Uphold
- We Are Family: Shocking Celebrity Relatives!
- Let’s Be Real: Things in Life You Need to Blame Yourself For From Time to Time
- Are You A Socially Awkward Black Girl?