All Articles Tagged "ending a relationship"
Breaking up is never an enjoyable part of the dating game, but sometimes it’s more than necessary. The key though, when you find yourself on the wrong side of a breakup, is making you sure a) don’t have a complete breakdown, b) don’t end up in jail, c) don’t end up in the same situation again. Here are 15 mistakes people make after breaking up, so be sure to avoid them if you really want to be able to move on from this.
One day out of the blue your guy breaks up with you. You’re of course stunned, sad, and questioning everything. The breakup hits you harder than any others before because it was a complete shock. You two were doing fine, or so you thought, and you had plans for the near future. Breakups are hard, but they’re even harder when you are completely blindsided by it. Though you’ll feel plenty of emotions, don’t let yourself get too down in the dumps. Here are some tips and ways to deal with a blindsided breakup.
I’m certainly no expert in the art of break-ups. I’ve had to do it a couple of times and it was not fun. I’ve had it done to me before and it wasn’t fun then either. If the breakup comes about as a result of some indiscretion — cheating, lying, he was married or had six baby mamas in hiding, etc. — then no, there is no need for a “nice” break-up. But when you want to end things on good terms, is there really a “nice” way to do it?
The answer is yes.
Some people chicken out and try to act like a jerk so that the other person breaks up with them first. Or they play some kind of game instead of being upfront so they won’t appear to be the bad guy. But while the thought of hurting someone can be daunting, if you respect the other person, you should do what’s right and let them go for their own sake. The key is to do it amicably and maturely. There is an art to dumping someone with dignity and these nine guidelines are here to help you through the messy business of ending a relationship (the correct way).
During a break up there are all sorts of words said and lines dropped. When a once-good relationship is ending, it’s not uncommon for one of the two people involved to drop the “let’s be friends” line. Though it sounds good at the time, being friends after breaking up usually isn’t a wise idea and here are 14 reasons why.
In your mind the relationship is over. Something irreparable has gone wrong, and you’re ready to go your own way. However, before you can officially make yourself a single lady, you’ll have to first breakup with your soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend. When it comes to breaking up, there are some dos and don’ts that you’ll want to keep in mind, otherwise you’ll end up complicating things and making a bad situation even worse. Here are 14 breakup etiquette tips.
Breaking up is hard to do and no matter if you’re the dumper or the dumpee, it’s never an easy situation. During a breakup there are all sorts of emotions flying around and with so many different feelings go on, you may find yourself saying something that you don’t mean, or something that is completely stupid. To make sure that your breakup doesn’t become even worse, here are 14 things to avoid saying.
In a relationship, there is always the risk that it’ll end, either mutually, or because of you, or because of him. Not all relationships have happy endings and sometimes those ends come after plenty of warning signs and red flags. If you’re in a relationship with a guy that is going down-hill, there are some definite signs to look out for. Here are 14 signs that your boyfriend is breaking up with you in the near future.
Are you being too picky? Is this simply a transitional phase in your relationship? Are you PMSing? These are all perfectly normal questions to ask yourself when you’re feeling less-than-great about your relationship. Nobody wants to fall out of love. We fear it so much, that we’ll make an excuse for every single broken thing in our relationship (even when literally every single part of that relationship is broken) to keep up the facade that things are fine. But sometimes you just can’t deny that you have or are falling out of love. And the sooner you face it, the sooner you can move on and fall back in love with somebody new!
No one wants to be the one to call it quits on a relationship but sometimes it’s inevitable. When it comes to breaking up, there are definite wrong and right ways to do it. Here are 14 tips for a breakup that won’t turn hateful, spiteful, or difficult.
Relationships can be extremely hard, and ending them can sometimes be worse, particularly if the relationship was troubling or even abusive. If you’re not careful you can sit back and think/obsess over all the time that you “wasted” on that individual. Remembering times when you were being used, feelings of anger and mentally replaying over and over how that person screwed you over can sometimes lead you to the land of bitterness.
Now don’t get me wrong, you have every right to be mad. If you’ve invested a large amount of time in someone, the relationship went southward and it started to affect the way you see yourself, I’m not trying to rob you of your indignation. I’m trying to help you so that two years after said breakup, you’re not cussing strangers out in the street for wearing the same socks as your ex.
So go ahead, get angry, listen to those empowerment songs, and throw away his/her pictures. But when you get done mourning and being angry, maybe these few things can help you to bypass the bitter feelings so you’re not trapped in a emotional remake of the movie Groundhog Day:
Get it all out – So many times when things go wrong, we end up rehashing them because we haven’t allowed ourselves to really express how we feel. We feed ourselves a falsehood by saying: “If I don’t think about it then it won’t be that bad.” Actually, it makes it worse. Those dormant feelings will continue to bubble under the surface, just waiting for any opportunity to pop back up. Address how you feel, how things went wrong, why you hate that stupid shirt he/she wore. Get it all out. Once it’s all out, you’ll feel a lot better.
Don’t think about what-ifs – The man who I married (and am now divorcing) was highly sought after at the job where we worked. All most everyday was frustrating for me because I would constantly walk in on these women propositioning him as if I didn’t exist. When we made the decision to end our marriage my mind kept on going back to: “What if I would have just took a step back and let those women have him? Maybe I wouldn’t be going through what I am right now? They would be the ones angry and running after a toddler by themselves while I’d be living some preposterous hyperbolic lifestyle.”
The problem with all of this is, it wasn’t them. It was me. What’s the point of rehashing what could have been? This is your life, this is what you decided and this what you have to deal with. Now, it might not be pleasant, but thinking about the alternative routes that you should have gone down is only distracting you from making better decisions in the future. Forget the what-ifs, just learn better for tomorrow. Like I’ve read somewhere before: “Life is like a camera, focus on what’s important, capture the good, and develop from the negatives.”
Realize that you’re better without him/her – If the person you were involved with was a class A douche, instead of being bitter about all of the crap he did, be happy that that loser is finally out of your life! Celebrate it! For me being in an emotionally abusive relationship where I wasn’t allowed to see my friends when I wanted to after we broke up I remember sitting back thinking: “I can’t believe he used to isolate me like that.” Now I can go, see and talk to whoever I want to! My dorm room wasn’t a prison anymore and I finally had the freedom that I didn’t have. Instead of thinking about how much of a jerk he was, see the great things that you now have access to because he’s gone!
Take Yourself Off the Pedestal – Okay, this is going to be a little touchy for some. But, it’s important. Sometimes when you’ve been hurt, you can sometimes go from feeling bad about the situation to feeling bad for ourselves. That’s only a slippery slope to victimization and wallowing in your own self-pity. Yes, what happened to you was horrible, but feeling sorry for yourself is just going to keep you in that terrible space and validate your feelings of bitterness. We’re working away from that.