All Articles Tagged "crushes"
If you were to ask Madame Noire herself who was her celebrity crush, you can easily guess her response. Oh yes, it would be Idris Elba: the man we love to love. But instead of getting lost in our dreamy-eyed fantasies about Mr. Elba, we decided to once again take to the streets of New York to find out which celebrities you fantasize about.
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“I don’t see it.” That’s exactly what I say each time the following names are brought up in a conversation about hot men in Hollywood. While many women, even followers of this site, swear up and down that these brothas are delicious and could “get it,” I’m always reading their comical comments, scratching my head and thinking, “Wow…really?” I’m a fan of most of these individuals, but you won’t see me throwing my panties at the computer screen for ‘em. But hey, whatever floats your boat, right?
Ever since Beyoncé upgraded this brotha, people have been saying for years that he’s got it going on. Got what going on and in what way you ask? I can’t say 100 percent, but you can probably blame it on June Ambrose who made him re-evaluate his fashion choices, and the business sense he cultivated on his own, which helped him reach an audience outside regular hip-hop fans, invest in NBA teams, push a fashion label, be the head at Def Jam for a while and more. That in turn helped him rake in more and more money, and a lot of women find a man good with money to be attractive. For the most part, he seems to be a pleasant and sweet character, especially when he’s with his lady and baby girl. But all that talk of “Jay is looking good as hell right now!” just because he put a fitted cap on evades me…
Hey loves! I hope you’ve been having a great weekend! I’ve got some music news, wedding news, movie news and more for you! Of course, a celebrity is throwing shade to their peers…surprise surprise. Check it out!
by Marissa Ellis
We often hear about how men love the chase. That theory comes up whenever one tries to explain why a certain male suitor loses interest after a woman gives up the goods after a first date or why when a woman makes the first move, it kind of backfires (in the end).
But this whole coveting what you can’t have is not just a male phenemonen, it’s one experienced by the ladies as well. Unfortunately, when women have that issue, the backlash is felt much more deeply. Since it’s more acceptable for men to pursue and go to great legnths to win the object of their desires, they’re not seen in a negative light for pursuing. But, they do suffer when they get what they want and still want what they can’t have. Which means they’re on to the next.
I myself have this problem. It’s agonizing actually. To want someone just because you can’t have him. What it means in my life is that I’m never satisfied with a relationship and when I’m out of a relationship, I’m stuck with experiencing crush after crush after crush. After many years of going through this, I know how dysfunctional and damaging this tendency of mine is. It was proven recently when I went out with a guy whom I had an intense crush on. Usually, I’ll keep my distance from crushes so as to maintain that feeling of yearning. This time, I guess the feelings were mutual. We went out a few times and wouldn’t you know it, I fast became disinterested. So where does that leave me? Searching for the new object of my desires and back into this cycle of agony and yearning to no end.
I’ve tried to explore what it is that makes me so dysfunctional when it comes to relationships. From reading online about this particular problem, I did discover that I do have some sort of commitment issue. Duh. But why? I’m not sure. My parents, although not in the greatest of relationships, have been married for over 25 years. No commitment-phobes in my household.
What I do know is that I have the same problem many people have when it comes to unhappiness. And that is that I tend to compare myself to people I don’t know or to out-of-reach celebrities. I don’t compare myself to the actual couples I know but to the best couples I’ve ever met. What I’m doing now is trying to remain concious of the fact that my way of thinking is not conducive to my overall mental health. It’s a day by day process but hopefully, soon enough, I’ll break this cycle.
Have you dealt with a similar problem? How have you coped?
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How bad does it suck to have crushed on someone hard only to see them years later looking more busted than a crusty truck on the side of the road?
Happens all the time! Not only does it happen with everyday people we went to school with, worked with or lived around, but it definitely happens with our celebrity crushes (oh, MJ…). One minute a star can look so fine, be so talented, or so funny that you swoon over their posters, then the next, they can end up looking like Humpty Dumpty after the great fall. The ladies around here have all had us some Slick Rick-ish “Teenage Love” moments with men we knew we would never get our hands on, but now that they’re older, that might have been a good thing…