All Articles Tagged "children"
Giving birth is no joke — ask any mother you know and she’ll tell you that while the end result is nothing short of a beautiful miracle, the grueling hours before giving birth definitely take a toll on the mind and body. While giving birth in a hospital has been the norm for some time now, mothers nowadays have reverted to old ways and brought back the popularity of home birthing. Here are 14 celeb moms who gave birth at home.
“Are you and daddy getting divorced?”
I was four years old, sitting on the bathroom floor and chatting with my mom while she soaked in the tub, when I blurted out this question. “No, of course not!” she immediately responded. “Why would you think that?” I don’t remember what I said next, but somehow we moved on to a new topic.
Later I heard her whispering on the phone about what I’d said. She must have been thinking, How did my little girl, the one with the stay-at-home mom and Catholic upbringing, know about divorce? It’s not like my parents were screaming and slamming doors all the time. Their unhappiness wasn’t supposed to be obvious, especially not to a little girl. But somehow, even at that young age, I could sense that my parents were deeply unhappy in their marriage. Turns out they did get divorced—four years later, right around my eighth birthday. The quietly hostile relationship that my parents had when they were married bloomed into an outwardly hostile one during the split, and it stayed that way for years after the divorce papers were signed. By the time my sister and I were pre-teens, our dad had remarried and pretty much vanished from our lives.
Read more about marriage at YourTango.com
“Mommy, where do babies come from?”
It’s a question most parents dread to hear their children ask. Although it’s quite understandable that kids won’t have these answers, the truth is, their mother’s should. Ironically, most don’t.
Results of a controversial new study reveal that an alarmingly high percentage of women don’t know as much about their reproductive health as they should—many think that it helps to have sex multiple times a day and raise your hips afterward when you’re “trying” to conceive. Sadly, they’re mistaken.
Researchers from the Yale School of Medicine noticed so many misconceptions about medicine in their patients, they decided to survey 1,000 women ages 18-40 around the country about reproductive health. The findings, released Monday by Yale and First Response and published in the Journal of Fertility and Sterility, found that 51-percent of women surveyed incorrectly believe that having sex more than once a day would increase their chances of conception. A whopping 40-percent of participants believed lying on their back and raising their hips after sex and using certain sexual positions help with conception, despite the lack of any scientific evidence to back it. Since only 50-percent of women surveyed had ever discussed their reproductive health with their medical provider, we felt it was time for a little doctor’s visit for all.
We checked in with Lubna Pal, MBBS, MRCOG, MS, who is the Director of the Program for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and Associate Chair of Education at Yale University’s Department of Obstetrics, Gynecology & Reproductive Science, to find out what’s really going on here and what a woman hoping to concieve really needs to know.
Read more about pregnancy at Essence.com
Dear Dr. Sherry,
Here’s my convoluted mess of a life: About three years ago I moved to a new city. Six months later, I began seeing a person I worked with during my internship experience. He was a good guy. When we started, I was adamant that everything be kept casual. He really wanted a relationship, but I did not want to have drama at my new work place. He respected my request. I told him that it would just be between us and when he tried to push things further, I quickly, and a little rudely, rebuffed him. He eventually began dating someone else. Since I was the one who decided not to take things further, I understood. He dated this woman for several months. I was eventually promoted and moved to another division of the company.
In October 2012, he began calling again and he told me that things were over between him and the other woman. He and I still work for the same company at different locations, but I am in a leadership position now. Even though I still had reservations about dating him, we began a physical relationship. He came over in November depressed but could not (or would not) explain what was wrong. In December, someone that still works with him told me that the other woman he dated revealed that she was pregnant. I know him. I know he wants to be a good father and make things work with anyone who has his child. I asked him if she was pregnant and he told me “no.”
Fast forward to last week and I see a photo of the girl and the baby, who looks just like him. I asked him again and he finally admitted that he was the father. He asked me to forgive him for lying, but I feel betrayed. I cannot handle this, so I told him that it was over after a year and a half of dating seriously. He asked me how long I thought I would be mad about this. Umm, forever! Then he said that she is here (meaning the baby) now and that we can’t be mad anymore. The baby is four months old.
I know he did not cheat on me but he damn sure lied about his child. He didn’t want me to end things again, but I do not feel I can trust him. I love him truly but this is some Maury mess and we are too old for this foolishness.
I went to the doctor recently and found out that my blood pressure has gone way up and I’m a month pregnant. He used condoms every time; I really don’t know how this happened. I have decided not to tell him. He is going to have to see her and what if things kick up for them again. I couldn’t take him leaving again. I’m tired of the stress. Is it best we cut ties and I raise this baby by myself? Am I being fair? Does he deserve fairness?
Oh, everyone in this scenario is over 30.
My Life’s A Complicated Mess
Read Dr.Sherry’s response at Essence.com
Late Friday night, the pop icon known as Madonna was feeling proud of her 13-year-old son Rocco and his MMA-style workout so she posted a picture of him on Instagram. Many parents are proud of their kids, right? Right. But the problem with her picture was the caption:
If you’re having trouble seeing it, the caption reads: “No one messes with Dirty Soap. Mama said knock you out! #dis[n-word]
Her comments section immediately blew up, both with people criticizing her use of the word as well as people defending her use of the word. Well, it all seemed to annoy Madonna so she took down the original picture but put it back up with a new caption that said:
“Ok let me start this again. #get off my dick haters!”
Hmm. So people who are criticizing you for using what many consider a racial slur are now your haters? That’s an interesting way of seeing things.
But of course, as all things go when celebrities find themselves in major hot water, she then took that picture down too and according to Hip Hop Wired, she apologized for it all on Saturday:
“I am sorry if I offended anyone with my use of the N-word on Instagram. It was not meant as a racial slur…I am not a racist. There’s no way to defend the use of the word. It was all about intention…It was used as a term of endearment toward my son who is white. I appreciate that it’s a provocative word and I apologize if it gave people the wrong impression. Forgive me.”
Be clear: Madonna is not apologizing for using the word, she’s apologizing to anyone who may have been offended by her using the word. This is obviously something she says on a regular basis under the guise of it being a “term of endearment.”
Madonna is also the mother of two black children and many immediately questioned how she speaks around them.
Here’s thing: If you’re going to say something, stand by it. There’s no way Madonna didn’t know that her posting that word would start this type of uproar. If you’re bold enough to use it, then be bold enough to stick by it and keep it up. Apologies are unnecessary when they’re empty and not truly sincere.
What do you think? Is Madonna wrong for using the n-word or is it okay for everybody to use it freely?
I am a 24 year’s old and the mother of 1-year-old twins boys and a six month old son. I have a full time job and I go to school online too. My ex and I were together for four years and now we are just co-parenting. I admit our relationship was unhealthy. We argued, made up and then argued and made up again. At times I even felt unsafe around him. He used to grab me, pull me and corner me. He threatened me many times, even when I was eight months pregnant with my third child. I got out of that relationship with the help and support of my mother.
Now, 10 months later, he calls every once in a while to tell me how he is going to counseling and trying to change his ways. For the first time in 10 months he actually bought food for our sons. I do everything and I did everything when we were together even when he lost his job and I was pregnant. Now I’m slowly moving on, but for some reason I am still thinking of him and feeling bad because I know he is in a bad place and I’m struggling to get my head right for me.
I met a guy I work with who makes me feel like a real woman. He takes me to dinners and makes me laugh and it seems like he could actually providea great future if thing headed that way. The thing is, I’m nervous because I am not ready to commit and somehow I feel like I should be with my sons’ father.
I don’t know what to do or how to move on. I don’t even know if I should move on. I believe because of the kids I feel like I should still try to make it work, especially if he’s making new effort, but then again, I know going back can be the biggest mistake. I’m not sure he will change. How do I get my head right for my family’s sake?
A Young Mother
Read what Dr. Sherry had to say on Essence.com
For some couples, the decision to have children is something that was decided well before marriage. But for many couples, choosing whether or not to have children can be one of their most daunting issues. Because this decisions is irreversible, it’s one that can’t be taken lightly.
Sometimes the argument for parenthood is obvious: parenthood can be infinitely rewarding on many levels. There is no bond like that between a parent and child. Having children can also create a special bond between you and your partner as co-parents and may ultimately lead to the incomparable joy of having grandchildren later on.
At the same time, raising a child is an enormous task and its intensity cannot truly be imagined until experienced. Parenting means an incredible energetic, emotional, and financial commitment. Every aspect of life changes when parenting and this new life will account for much of your time. It may even define you!
Exploring the question of whether or not to have children can bring your deepest values, joys and fears to the surface. Start the conversation well before you plan to start your family to make sure you two are on the same page. Here are four of the most important considerations to talk through with your partner.
1. It can’t be about your friends.
The decision of whether or not to have a child needs to be made solely by you and your partner. Yet the pressure from others can cloud your thinking. Just because others around you are starting families doesn’t mean it’s the right time for you. Don’t let the desire to maintain your friendships by ensuring you are in similar lifestyles be a factor in making the best decision for you and your partner. Ask yourselves, “Why do we really want children?”
It’s also not your parents’ decision. Many couples feel pressured by their parents who want grandchildren. Your parents may want grandchildren and be disappointed if they don’t have them, but they’re not entitled to grandchildren. Conceiving out of guilt is not going to serve anyone in the long run. Ask yourselves, “Are we ready to make parenting our top priority? If so, what sacrifices are we specifically ready and willing to make?”
Read more about family planning at YourTango.com
Well, it looks like DMX is trying to clean up parts of his act. The rapper recently cleared up one of the debts owed to one of the mothers of his children.
DMX’s (real name Earl Simmons) rep, Nati, told TMZ that he and Patricia Trejo have settled this child support battle. Though he wouldn’t say how much Simmons paid Trejo, the outstanding bill was for about $1 million dollars and he allegedly knocked out a chunk of it. That $1 million owed was for over 10 years of back child support and they had been in court for quite some time fighting.
X’s passport had been seized due to the large amount of money owed but according to Nati, he is now in Europe doing shows. It makes sense to to go overseas and do shows because he hasn’t been booked consistently here in the States in years.
Clearing up the financial troubles as it pertains to child support is great because surely the mothers could use it, but one must also wonder if he’s working on fixing the relationships with his children too. I suppose you have to take things slow and maybe one day he’ll be able to build relationships with them.
Let’s just hope he doesn’t get behind on support with her again because he still has financial issues with the other mothers.
A new study on fathers’ involvement with their children reveals that Black men are more active in their child’s life than ever.
Out of the Black fathers who live with their children, 75 percent help with tasks like bathing and diapering, compared to 60 percent White and 45 percent Latino. The study, which involved 3,900 men between 2006 and 2010, also showed that 35 percent of Black fathers who lived with their young children said they read to them daily, compared to 30 percent of White dads and 22 precent of Latino dads.
In addition, the study found that Black fathers who lived outside of the house were at least as involved as other dads who didn’t live with their kids, or more so.
You can vote and check out other people’s point of view over on ESSENCE.com. What do you think? Do Black fathers get a bad rep? Is it that one bad apple spoiling the bunch thing?
Monica has logged a ton of miles on her journey to becoming one of R&B’s elite solo acts.
The veteran songtress has also gained plenty of wisdom along the way, which she uses to keep peace in her personal life.
Strength, courage, and wisdom make up the formula to Monica’s success and longevity in the business. These qualities also provide solace to the Grammy award winner, despite her ex-fiancé’s refusal to pay child support for his two young boys. Unlike many single moms, Monica has the means to give her children the world, and then some. But that doesn’t excuse the father of her children, Rocko, from not stepping up to plate, she says.
Nevertheless, the Atlanta native has managed to blend the family she started in her previous relationship, with her new husband, NBA veteran Shannon Brown. And news recently broke that the happy couple is expecting their first child this fall.
“People always ask me, ‘How do you make a blended family work?’ It is what you make it. The first order of business as parents is we gotta respect one another,” Monica told Jermaine Dupri on the latest episode of his reality webseries. “I don’t believe in the court system. I’m not steppin’ in no court house, I’m not callin’ them people.”
She continued, “Let me explain. This is my thing. I’m sure every situation may require something different, but for me, I feel like a real man will be man enough to assess the needs of his child, and make sure that it happens. I don’t need to call you and I don’t need to call them people for you,” Monica reasoned.
For more insight on Monica’s blended family, read on at EurWeb.com