By Kariba Williams

Source: honestannouncements.com

Let me start by saying that my friend is awesome. She’s gorgeous, intelligent, independent, and works for a major television network. She comes and goes as she pleases and takes exotic vacations at liberty. As Ne-yo would say, she’s got her own. What she and I can’t wrap our minds around is the fact that she’s still single. She’s conquered everything except for her love life. At 21, we would talk for hours about the type of men we would marry. At that time, her ideal mate was tall, handsome, had a career, owned a nice vehicle, had his own apartment, good credit and no children. Once she found her own career path, she was more than confident that the man she wanted wasn’t too far from her reach. After all, she does have a lot to offer and Mr. Right was probably two office buildings away, right? Fast forward to 2012 and at age 30, my friend will now settle for a man with a good job (maybe a city job if he’s passionate about it), no car, has a roommate, and can still afford to take care of his children while courting her. How crazy is that!? With all of her accolades, my friend now believes that her previous desires in a man may have been too much.

In my opinion, what she wanted at age 21 is certainly more attainable at age 30. Theoretically, she’s right on par with the societal trend. Women are definitely putting more focus on career first and family second. Some women are opting not to have children in the interest of the rat race. However, my friend is not one of those women. She comes from a close knit family and most of her friends are married or in a relationship with at least one child. That alone shouldn’t be an issue, but couple that with her mom’s constant grandbaby rain dance and you have a recipe for a boatload of stress. Outside of the ticking of her own biological clock, she has to hear the question, “When are you going to have children?” The answer to which she always half jokingly answers, “When I get a man.”

The old adage is that you don’t go looking for love. You’re supposed to let love find you. In my opinion, those words are reserved for recital by the people who are already in relationships or trying to get out of one. As a married woman, I can’t even count the number of times I’ve said that to people that are single. To be quite honest, I say it out of habit. Its the same thing that was said to me when I was single. Even then, I remember thinking, “Shut up, you have a man.” However, it’s pretty true. I was not looking for love when I met my husband. I was actually on a man fast (nothing religious, just pissed). I wasn’t initially open to his advances and his shoes were turning me off. Yes, we were so young that his shoes were a factor. Unlike my friend, I didn’t have a serious list with regard to the opposite sex. My husband and I just sort of helped each other develop. Neither one of us had a career at that point and we pretty much just figured stuff out. We did it right, in the traditional sense (marriage and then children), but I feel like my friend has the formula down to a science. Her formula is career and steady finance, marriage and then babies. Where could she possibly have gone wrong?

Logically, she should have men at her beck and call, but it almost seems like she’s being punished for her chosen path. Why is it that she, as a professional black woman, would need to lower her standards to find love? I’ve even considered the intimidation excuse. The single successful black woman usually brings that up as a factor, but that has never been a topic in our conversations. I know that whenever her dating life (or lack thereof) comes up in conversation, I tell her until I’m blue in the face, “DO NOT SETTLE.” I understand why she tweaked parts of her list. She wanted what she believed to be a better chance of finding someone. What I need her to understand is that now, she should expect more. The more a man ages, the more he should’ve attained. It is time for her to up the ante and expect a man with maturity, financial literacy, and a provider of the utmost respect. I know it’s redundant, but I tell her to be patient because the man for her is worth the wait. She’s that project girl that worked her way up and shouldn’t have to feel compelled to keep one leg in the barrel. She’s the bomb and Emmy nominated. Trust, a great man should, and is going to recognize.

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By Patricia Elie

If you hadn’t heard, black professionals are now practicing alternative methods to seeking a date due to their busy lifestyles. I personally have experienced the frustration of going to the club, as well as the after work party and spending countless hours online but finding no suitable counterpart. As a result, I sought other practices to finding a date.

In particular, speed dating has become a preferred option for those seeking to meet a variety of singles at one setting (all in one is fun!). Since many in the black community don’t partake in this form of networking often, some tend to be apprehensive toward the idea of “dating” several strangers in one night. But in actuality, speed dating is not awkward (unless you’re REALLY awkward) and can be lots of fun.
As a host of speed dating events, I have witnessed the mistakes that both men and women make when participating in their three to five-minute dates. From the attitudes they come in with that can turn people off, to focusing too much on themselves. If you’re looking to try this method of meeting up, here are some suggestions that can help make your next speed dating event (or first) not only enjoyable but eventful.

By Charlotte Young

When junior-level business women in New York go to a networking event, they’ve come to expect that career advice and card exchanges aren’t the only thing that awaits them. Much to the disapproval of many of these women, they also get a bonus fashion show.

The Jane Dough reports that just this fall, one of the top investment banks held one such event at Saks Fifth Avenue. After the run-of-the-mill career tips and pointers given by some of the bank’s senior women on staff, the discussion then made way for the fashion show. Models appeared wearing supposedly work-appropriate outfits on a makeshift-runway. As each one sported the high class suits, the women were told not to worry about the short length of the skirts because the models were very tall.

One can only imagine that an event featuring older women advising against wearing high fashion business wear to work followed by a show of high fashion suits available for purchase, was a bit of a mixed message.

Some women see these events as “behind the times,” playing off old stereotypes of the working woman’s purpose and expected appearance in the office. One woman disclosed that not only do these conflicting and borderline offensive events occur often; she even gets some flak from male co-workers about her attendance. The men want to know why they aren’t invited to networking events held at Saks Fifth Avenue.

“The feminism of female bankers today is that we aren’t there to prove ourselves as men, but to make money,” she tells the Jane Dough. “You’re not there because you want to be the breadwinner in order to prove a point. So putting us in Saks Fifth Avenue as a way to bond with other women is just a little warped.”

Jane Newton, an experienced financial advisor, tells The Jane Dough that while younger women may be skeptical of the events, she’s heard many senior women express their belief that women new to the working world don’t know how to dress for the job.

So what is a business-minded, focused young woman of today to do amidst such fashion networking events? Newton says that these budding women professionals need to “pick their battles.” Young women should take any opportunity to network and if they find the fashion show networking events offensive, they should try to find another workplace-sponsor event as a networking opportunity.

(Black Enterprise) — As the economy recovers, air travel and car rental costs are expected to remain nearly flat, and hotel rates are expected to decline in the remainder of 2010, predicts the National Business Travel Association. The NBTA says companies will take advantage of the low travel costs to send employees on the road in greater volumes. That’s great because actually occupying an office to do business is no longer America’s reality. The advent of mobile technology has allowed busy professionals to conduct business from anywhere they choose in the world, whether it be in a car, on a plane, or at a hotel. Here are three mobile technology products that you and your employees can use to conduct business more efficiently while also helping you reduce checked and carry-on baggage.

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