All Articles Tagged "boys"

I’m Gone Marry Him! Teen Crushes We All Had

July 11th, 2013 - By Meg Butler
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Remember being young and boy crazy? We do too. So we collected all of our favorite celebrity boy crushes from the ’90s. These boys made our hearts throb, filled our walls on posters, and were our favorite obsessions. Check out the list of guys every girl went crazy over back in the day. Did we miss anyone?

Building Your Child’s Self Esteem | Mommy in Chief

June 17th, 2013 - By jade
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In this episode of Mommy in Chief, we are discussing how to build your child's self esteem. It is very important as a mother to build your child's self esteem from birth. We also have a special treat for you at the end of the segment. You don't want to miss the cutest little kids expressing how confident and beautiful they are!


Iris L. Johnson, LCSW, PC, is a graduate of Hunter College School of Social Work, Ackerman Institute Externship and Hunter College's Adoption Therapy Programs. Ms. Johnson has served in leadership positions at several New York City social service agencies and has extensive experience working with young children, adolescents, and families who have experienced trauma and socioeconomic oppression. She has presented nationally on issues that impact women and children, especially families of African descent.

She is a mother of two-one biological and one foster care/adoption.

Ms. Johnson maintains a private practice in New York City and Brooklyn, working with individuals, couples, families, and groups.


Want More Mommy In Chief? Watch these episodes:

 Season 3

Season 2

Season 1


Would You Let Your 6-Year-Old Daughter Have A ‘Boyfriend?’

February 15th, 2013 - By madamenoire
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Source: Shutterstock

Source: Shutterstock

From Your Tango

Valentines Day is here, and love is in the air. To be honest, these days it warrants little more than a mention for me and my husband. After 20 years and 2 children together, the over-priced bouquets and twinkling trinkets have lost their appeal. Him doing the laundry every Sunday morning? Now that‘s a major turn-on.—

For our daughter, though, Valentines Day is a pretty big deal. She’s just about 7 years old and, like a lot of little girls, is enamored with hearts and flowers and the idea of love.

“I’m not in love with anyone,” she complained the other day from her carseat.

“That’s okay,” I told her. “You have lots of time to be in love.”

“Well, I was going to get married to someone,” she said, emphasizing the past tense. “But now I’m not.

Read the rest of the story on

Boys?! The President & First Lady Talk About The Girls’ Dating Future In The White House

January 5th, 2013 - By MN Editor
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"Malia Obama pf"

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Malia Obama, 14, has four more years left in the White House before she jets off to the college or university of her choice.

But in the meantime her parents, President Obama and First Lady Michelle, have one major hurdle to cross: boys! The First Couple sat down with People to talk about the possibility of Malia dating in the coming future.

The President was asked about his jokes on having the Secret Service keep boys away from Malia and if she wanted to put an end to those rules. “She actually doesn’t pay any attention to what I say,” he said, laughing.

He went on to share he doesn’t worry too much because he and Michelle have set a strong foundation for their girls. “The great thing about the girls is they’ve got a wonderful role model in their mom. They’ve seen how Michelle and I interact — not only the love but also respect that I show to their mom. So I think they have pretty high expectations about how relationships should be, and that gives me some confidence about the future…”

Amen, President Obama. Read the rest of his fairly moving comments about the girls and what Michelle Obama had to add over on Essence.

Are we the only ones who can’t wait to see if Malia will be dating  – and if so, who – over the next four years?

Pass Or Play? Nicki Minaj Talks Ungrateful Chicks And Gets High Fashion Chic For “Freedom” Video

November 20th, 2012 - By Clarke Gail Baines
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For a little while there it seemed that Nicki Minaj was only going to drop pop joints for public consumption, but every now and again the femcee goes back to her roots and showcases her lyrical prowess by giving us a bit of bragaddacio, as well as an opportunity to vent her frustrations on a track. That’s what “Freedom,” is supposed to be doing for the listener, while the video, which she dropped yesterday, is just supposed to be visually appealing for the eyes, with Nicki dressed in frilly dresses, a crown, ornate accessories and letting the wind blow through her hair. The video was done by Colin Tilley and it’s definitely colorless and more melancholy than anything she has put together in the past. I’m actually feeling it, though I could have lived without the Jesus comparisons (“They’ll never thank me for opening doors
But they ain’t even thank Jesus when he died on the cross”), but she wouldn’t be the first musician to do such a thing, so it is what it is. Either way though, the song (especially the beat) is pretty good, and the video is a nice change of pace after watching people walk around in panties past a technicolor-looking background (a la, the video “The Boys”). “Freedom” is off of Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded – The Re-Up, which was released yesterday. But what do you think of the video? Give it a chance, you might dig it. Let us know what you think below.

So is it a pass or play for you?

Chicago’s Urban Prep Does it Again; Every Senior College Bound

April 2nd, 2012 - By MN Editor
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For the third consecutive year, every single senior at Urban Prep Academy, the only all-black, all-male charter high school in Chicago, has been accepted to college, school officials announced.

The academy also said that 83 percent of its first graduating class in 2010 has re-enrolled in a second year of college, a rebuttal to critics of the school who have charged that students aren’t always ready for college, reports the Chicago Tribune.

Critics have also suggested that Urban Prep squeezes out students with academic and discipline problems who other schools have to work with. Urban Prep officials acknowledge that this year’s senior class of 85 was almost twice that size when the boys started out as freshmen.

But Urban Prep CEO Tim King, in a meeting Thursday with the Chicago Tribune’s editorial board, vigorously denied that troubled students are forced out or encouraged to leave.

For more information on how these young brothers did it, visit


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XXL Staff Suspended Over Too Short Video

February 16th, 2012 - By Brande Victorian
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Once Too Short’s “Fatherly Advice” video went online last week, the viral disgust spread like wildfire. Later the same day the video was removed from XXL’s site, but many said that wasn’t enough and they demanded that the publication’s editor-in-chief, Vanessa Satten, be fired. So far that hasn’t happened, but the staff responsible for uploading the video has been suspended.

On Monday, XXL and Too Short issued an apology for the clip which went up last Friday. For XXL’s part, the EIC stated she agrees with those who were angered by the video and relinquished responsibility for the posting:

“I do not see all content before it goes live. When I saw this video, I was truly offended and thought it crossed the line. I had it taken down immediately. I am disappointed that an employee decided to post it and I am putting internal procedures in place to make sure content like this does not go on the site. The video goes against my value system and represents poor judgment on behalf of the individual who posted it.”

And Too Short was basically, Too Short:

“I want to apologize to anyone I may have offended with the XXL video interview I recently did. When I got on camera I was in Too $hort mode and had a lapse of judgement.I would never advise a child or young man to do these things, it’s not how I get down. Although I have made my career on dirty raps, I have worked over the years to somewhat balance the content of my music with giving back to the community. Just coming from a man who wants to see young people get ahead in life, I’m gonna do my best to to help and not hurt. If you’re a young man or a kid who looks up to me, don’t get caught up in the pimp, player, gangster hip-hop personas. Just be yourself.”

Since issuing this statement, the internal procedure has meant suspension for those who were responsible for producing and posting the video, and development of a new method of uploading to make sure this doesn’t happen again. Vanessa Satten also wants to make it clear that she is in no way down with the “fatherly advice” that was shared, saying in another statement that as soon as a reader made her aware of the video she had it taken down.

“As a woman, I in no way find the content of the video acceptable. To think I would ever approve anything that would harm women or endanger children is absurd. Under no terms should sexual assault be tolerated, nor do I endorse making light of it.”

Since comments are closed on both statements, it’s hard to say whether this will satisfy the public, but I’m curious why the content of the video wasn’t discussed before production began anyway. Sounds like someone is passing the buck. I vote no more Too Short videos period.

Do you think Vanessa Satten should be fired over the Too Short controversy? Is suspension enough for the XXL employees behind the video?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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No Girls Allowed: School Under Fire for All-Boys ‘Red Tails’ Field Trip

February 13th, 2012 - By Brande Victorian
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There was already plenty of controversy surrounding the lack of black women in the George Lucas Tuskegee Airmen film “Red Tails,” but now a school district in Dallas is catching heat, and possibly, a case for sending about 5,700 fifth grade boys on a field trip to see the movie, and excluding girls.

According to a teacher, the trip was a part of black history month, and the film was chosen because it was something that boys would be interested in, as the movie is about historically significant African American men. Of the choice to exclude girls, Independent School District spokesman Jon Dahlander, said:

“There is only so much available space at the movie theater, so the decision was made for boys to attend the movie. Girls stayed at school but principals were given the option to show them ‘Akeelah and the Bee.’”

Title IX funds were used to cover the cost of the nearly $60,000 field trip, which included $32,000 for the cost of movie tickets and an additional $25,000 for bus rentals, not to mention paying substitute teachers to instruct the girls who were still in the classroom. Title I money is used for educating low-income students, but because Title IX prohibits schools that get federal money from gender-based discrimination, outside groups are questioning whether the provision has been violated.

The American Association of University Women told the Dallas Morning News that the field trip was a case of “separate but unequal,’’ and a statement by the Dallas district’s board of trustees saying that they thought boys would enjoy the combat movie more than the girls doesn’t do much to to nullify that stance.

I actually think sending black boys to see the film as a way to instill pride as African American men would’ve been a great idea, but the fact that the district didn’t even think that deeply and made the trip more of a “boys play with guns, girls play with barbies” situation, makes it hard to justify the exclusion of female students. What year is it, 1950?

What do you think about this “Red Tails” field trip? Should the school district be held accountable for excluding girls from seeing the film?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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Too Short Gives Disgusting Fatherly Advice About Girls to Middle School Boys

February 10th, 2012 - By Brande Victorian
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Too Short never claimed to be a role model and I’m not sure why XXL is making him out to be one, but for some reason the magazine has given him a platform for “fatherly advice” and in his third lesson on the birds and the bees, he’s giving middle school boys some disturbing tricks on mind manipulation to “turn little girls out” and essentially take advantage of them sexually. Here’s what he said:

“When you get to late middle school, early high school and you start feeling a certain way about the girls… I’m gonna tell you a couple tricks. This is what you do, man. A lot of the boys are going to be running around trying to get kisses from the girls, we’re going way past that. I’m taking you to the hole.

There’s a general area down there, a little spot that girls have that feels really good to them. Don’t kiss them down there yet, that’s later in life. But this is what you do. You push her up against the wall or pull her up against you while you lean on the wall and you take your finger and put a little spit on it and you stick your finger in her underwear and you rub it on there and watch what happens. It’s like magic. You gotta find her spot, they all have a different one, but it’s somewhere in there. Just go for it. When you feel like it becomes a little more moist that’s when you know you’re doing it right.”

I personally think his advice is pretty irresponsible, yet somewhat expected from a raunchy rapper such as himself, but XXL really shouldn’t promote this type of foolishness for young boys, particularly when he’s leaning heavily toward aggressive sexual behavior played out against pre-teen girls.

Check out the clip and see what you think. Should XXL take this down?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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Does Labeling Toys By Sex Promote Gender Inequality?

December 14th, 2011 - By Brande Victorian
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On the surface, the change from pink and blue labeling marking girls and boys toys to red and white signs; and the organization of toys by interest rather than gender inside Hamley’s toy store in the UK, looks like a simple store remodel. But a gender equality movement is staking a victory claim in the store’s facelift, claiming that their internet campaign is what motivated the store to remove its stereotypical labeling.

Gender apartheid is what blogger Laura Nelson said Hamley’s, which she also referred to as “shamleys,” was previously guilty of as she explained the horror of a pink girls floor “filled with fluffy objects” and a boys floor that was “all action and adventure.” Citing the dearth of women in leadership positions in the UK, Nelson says it all starts with toys:

“There are many contributing factors, and one is conditioning of children from an early age. Deep-rooted in our society are stereotypes that dictate to women and men and influence them on the roles in society that they are expected to fill.

“There is an underlying current of expectation, tradition and what is accepted as the norm, and it sets

down different paths for different genders which often becomes a reality.

“The toys that children are exposed to play a major part in this. From birth, boys and girls are bombarded with stereotypes; boys are allowed to be more aggressive and climb trees, while girls are encouraged to be passive and play with plastic teapots.

“Even the name that Hamleys uses for its beauty salon, ‘Tantrum’, is consistent with the stereotypical ‘hysterical’ woman – unsuited to leadership and far better aligned with the domestic role and fussing over home and appearance.”

Nelson considers the gender-neutral color scheme that now characterizes Hamley’s to be a “milestone,” tweeting: “Still can’t quite believe it, the campaign worked!!!!!!”

But she says she’s not done yet, “We still have work to do on the nature of the toys themselves.”

Nelson is right, there’s still a lot to do to achieve her group’s mission because even Hamley’s denies that her campaign had anything to do with their store’s redesign. It’s somewhat hard to believe as Nelson’s campaign has garnered quite a bit of attention, but a store spokesperson insist consultants and customer surveys revealed the store’s directional signage was confusing, therefore their intention was merely to improve customer flow. If that claim is true, should stores be listening to the gender apartheid campaign?

Dwindling the lack of women in corner offices down to the root cause of receiving an Easy Bake Oven at the age of 5 is a stretch, but the idea of socialization that it speaks to certainly is not. There are several cultural norms perpetuated on boys and girls that have long-lasting effects. Still, I’m not sure the responsibility of that socialization lies with toy stores. After all, it is parents who purchase toys for kids and who decide whether a video game is too violent for their child or the clothes that come along with a Barbie doll are too revealing. Several parents in Jezebel’s write up of the story even commented that they’ve purchased toy kitchens for their sons and don’t pay attention to gender labels anyhow.

Hamley’s caught some bad press for its store design as a result of Nelson’s efforts labeling it “sexist” when I don’t think that was necessarily at the root of its design. What I see happening is a trickle-down effect that will find any store with a boy/girl toy aisle guilty of gender discrimination when ultimately it is parents who will have the greatest influence on their child’s balance of femininity or masculinity and there’s not much you can do to police that. If you’re going to attempt to get at the root of gender roles in society you have to start with patient education about their influence on their child’s view of male-female roles.

What do you think about the connection between sex-assigned toys and gender inequality later in life? Should stores like Hamley’s be pressured into removing gender labels? Will it make a difference?

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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