All Articles Tagged "black women and white men"
We did the men, now it’s on to the women. We scoured the interwebs and our own treasure trove of celebrity knowledge to bring you 15 women who shocked us just a bit when they stepped out with white men.
Lately any time someone asks if I am single, I can pretty much guarantee they’re going to follow that question up with another one—have you tried online dating? I typically respond with a no, because black men aren’t on match.com or eHarmony. (I have absolutely no data to prove that, it’s just an assumption I have about online dating and the type of prospects I would find on these sites.) Although the thinking behind the surge in online dating sites was to simplify the whole process, it’s become clear that the same social norms that are at play when it comes to in-person dating are also at work online—at least when it comes to certain preferences like race.
If you typically meet white, black, Asian, or Latino dates in person, most likely you’re going to look for people of those same ethnicities online. If you’re going online to find “something new,” it may not be any easier than if you were to try the same at a bar, museum, or play. A new study from researchers at the University of California, Berkeley, found that more than 80 percent of the communication initiated by whites was to other whites on online dating sites, while only 3 percent went to blacks. Black members of the same site, on the other hand, were more open to dating whites and were ten times more likely to contact whites.
The results vary slightly from a 2009 analysis of okcupid.com, which found that men of all races wrote back to black women at a rate of 20 percent less than the average. I wouldn’t go as far as to suggest that this means black women are the least desirable of any race online (as this writer does); rather I think this is reflective of the fact that the interracial dating trend hasn’t yet caught on online. Let’s be honest.
Today’s world is an increasingly different place than it was even 20 years ago. But as a whole, our mindsets are far slower to change than the very ground beneath our feet. This is particularly true for women, whom society seems to make responsible for a significant portion of our moral underpinning, particularly when it comes to ideas surrounding dating and sex. Most women go by the rules to protect their reputations.
But do the same socialized limitations apply to the type of person you are willing to date, or more specifically, that person’s ethnic background? Or is there something else keeping you dating within your racial boundaries? Ultimately, it boils down to your own preferences — but you don’t need a Census-scale study to note that a black woman is far less likely, or even willing, to date outside her race than a black man. It’s time to change all that.
I’m fortunate to have the audacity of exercising my options. The fact is, when I step out with a lady who has an “other” background, I’m not worried about what her parents may think. But I am watching for other black women out the corner of my eye, concerned she might view me as a traitor, or go Sister Soulja and make a snide remark. Deep down, I’ve got this nagging feeling she doesn’t understand, nor does she know what she’s missing. Rather than feeling angry, jealous or betrayed, she should join the team.
So from a brutha to a sistah, here are the reasons you all really need to consider trying “something new.”
I am married to a Black man—dark-skinned, 100 percent cocoa. To me, there is nothing more physically beautiful on this earth. Notice I said physically. Outside of that, there are plenty of more financially, intellectually and emotionally stable options. It’s time to taste the unknown. There are just too many—too many bright and beautiful single Black women waiting for their Black prince charming, only to see more and more of them riding off with their porcelain-skinned beauties.
My question is what are you waiting for—a baby and no ring? Black men are obviously seeing a lot in others they like. As an open-minded woman, I can tell you from experience some things about white are right. In no particular order, here are the reasons you should be giving vanilla a chance.