How You Keep Breaking Your Own Heart

November 22, 2011 ‐ By Julia Austin

"Black woman crying"

Sure, there are a**holes out there. There are some true con artists. They’re amazing listeners. They figure you out. They stare at you like they’re looking into your soul. They know what you want to hear. They even know what to do and say to seem like a saint . And then they screw you. And screw you over. In some instances, it’s really not your fault. But to tell you the truth—most of the time it is. You have to remember that you’re the one choosing the men you date. You’re the one opting to go on date number 2, 3, etc. And you’re the only one who can determine what men will and will not be drawn to you. Honestly, you’re the reason your heart is being broken. But you can change that:

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  • Miss K

    GREAT list!

  • Sass

    There are some people you have no choice but to love from a far because it hurts to much to love them up close…
    and the unfortuanate side effect of ever really loving anyone is you will always love that someone…
    so when the red flags start coming up… RUN!!!!!  and don’t look back…

  • SoTrue

    Is “Jaustin” the writer of this article a man or woman? (No biggie; just curious)

  • Lthur10

    Great tips.. I might need to print this out!

  • Mz_M

    I must admit I see myself in many of these examples.  I think part of the process is recognizing the faults in yourself that we can so easily see in others. Having been that girl who over thinks every situation, who’s been staunch and independent on the outside while going crazy with jealously on the inside I see exactly why my situations have ended the way that they have.  I encourage everyone to get away from the “It’s all his fault” syndrome that never allows you to take responsibility for your actions. You have to be accountable to yourself if to no one else. I actually liked this article I think it was very well written and brought to light the many issues that women go through in their pursuit to find happiness with a partner.

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  • Sukari

    OMG! Many of these are me 🙁