Garcelle Beauvais Has Moved On From Her Ex Husband’s 5-Year Affair & Is Living Happy
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I have a wandering mind. I know what’s going to capture my attention. This morning it was an e-mail about a recent interview actress, host and author Garcelle Beauvais did with Live Happy for their October issue. I learned a lot about Beauvais which made me wonder even more about her life. So in addition to the info in the article, I did just a bit more research. The woman has had an interesting life so far.
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Early Family Life
During a sit down interview for her appearance on the webseries “Black Actress,” Beauvais said that her family consisted of 5 girls and two boys. She said they had a healthy sibling rivalry. As we reported before, her parents divorced when she was just three-years-old. And she lived with her mom and didn’t get to see her father as much afterward. She told Live Happy, “My mother brought us to this country where she didn’t know anybody. That took incredible guts. She taught me to be independent. She always said to me, ‘Don’t let yourself depend on a man where you’d be destitute if he left you.’ I think that’s why it’s always been so important for me to have my own that no one can take away from me.”
While many of us are familiar of the story of how her second marriage ended, there was a man before Mike Nilon. Before she was an actor, she was a model and had been in working since she was 17-years-old. She met her first husband, producer Daniel Saunders during one of her modeling projects. The two married in 1991 and Beauvais gave birth to their son Oliver that same year. After nine years of marriage, the couple filed for divorce citing irreconcilable differences.
When Garcelle met Mike Nilon she believed she’d found the perfect man to love her and her son. And during their nine year marriage, she believed she had the perfect husband. So, naturally it only made sense that Garcelle wanted to expand their family. The couple went through fertility treatments. It took a toll. Beauvais told People, “It’s hard in every single way: emotionally, physically. Luckily, we grew stronger as a couple.” After five years of trying, three miscarriages and two rounds of in vitro fertilization, the couple were able to have twin boys, Jaid and Jax.
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Five-year extramarital affair
This story might not exactly be news. But it’s so outrageous, it’s worth repeating. Shortly after the twins were born, Garcelle was using her husband’s phone because she’d left hers at home. When she picked it up, she saw a message from someone that said, “I love you.” That was how she learned that her husband of the past nine years had been carrying on an extramarital affair for the past five years. The news came as a complete shock to Garcelle. She told Live Happy, “This was the person I trusted. This was the man I thought was my final stop in relationships. My body shut down. I couldn’t get out of bed for days. There were nights I cried so much it was like the best ab workout I could do. The next day I was sore. If the Garcelle of today could tell that sobbing Garcelle something it would be, “You’re not going to believe it, but you’re gonna get through this. You’re going to get through it.”
As we reported earlier, when Garcelle learned of her husband’s other relationship, the same day she fired off an email to 10 of the couple’s friends explaining what she’d learned. One of those people leaked the email to the media and Garcelle had to address the scandal publicly. In a recent episode of Oprah’s “Where Are They Now,” Garcelle explained why she regretted doing that and how her children and her desire to keep them out of her drama helped her to heal.
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Living with her ex
Beauvais took the interest of her children so seriously, that at one point, she invited her husband to move back in with her at one point because one of her sons was having trouble sleeping. “I’ll tell you, seeing him first thing in the morning? I don’t even know how I did that. I might have hated him at the time but he was the boys’ dad and they loved him.” She likened the time to the embodiment of Michelle Obama’s catch phrase. “I went high. Girl, did I go high!”
In the Live Happy interview, Beauvais explained how she managed to heal from the betrayal of her husband’s actions and the hurt of the fact that her marriage was not only what she thought it was, it was over.
“When you’re going through something like this, all your friends want to rally around you and help you escape. Let’s go to a spa. Let’s go have drinks. And what I found was I needed to be still and let myself feel the pain. I think that’s what helped me recover, perhaps quicker than normal. It was the most excruciating pain I’d ever experienced in my life but I didn’t mask it, I didn’t try to distract myself, I didn’t put a Band-Aid on it. My biggest goal was to be able to co-parent with my ex. Our sons were 3, and I knew he was going to be in my life for a very long time. I didn’t grow up with a dad, and I never saw an intact relationship. It was important for me that my kids did. That was my mission.”
Beauvais also said that she saw a therapist for the first time during the split. Her therapist asked her what was it that she always wanted to do. She answered write. From there she authored her first children’s book. I am Awesome.
During a sit down with Wendy Williams, Beauvais said this when Wendy asked her if she was ready to date again.
“It’s over. It’s done. It’s hard! A man of quality, a man of substance especially in L.A. ?…So I’m taking my time.
When Wendy asked if she wanted to get married again, she said, ‘No. That would be a no.’
And the answer was the same for whether or not she wanted children.
A Lesson on Comparing Yourself to Others
During her interview for “Black Actress,” Beauvais offered some good advice about comparing yourself to others.
“We all get down if we feel like we didn’t get the role that we wanted or our career is not going as quickly or as exciting as somebody else. And I think a friend of mine said to me a long time ago and I’ll never forget, ‘Just because somebody else’s train has moved forward, doesn’t mean that you’re not going to move. We’re all on our own path. We’re all on a journey. Just because somebody else may seem like they’re doing better, you don’t know. You wish people well. But at the same time, that doesn’t mean you can’t do well and you’re not moving forward. So many times we compare ourselves to other people and I’ve been guilty of doing that. I think you can’t because we’re all on our own journey and wherever we’re going to get to, we’re going to get to and every step along the way is bringing you closer to where you want to go.”