Dumb Excuses People Use To Cheat
Cheating is a very complicated thing…or is it? If you listen to some cheater’s explanations and logic as to why they thought it would be okay to be unfaithful, they can be quite convincing. After all, they did get someone to sleep with them when that person likely knew they were in a relationship—so cheaters clearly have a way with words. But all the manipulation of language cannot make the person who was cheated on feel any less terrible once the act is over. Some might even say that infidelity is a feeling, more than anything else. A person can feel like they’ve been deeply betrayed, even if their partner hasn’t had sex with or even kissed somebody else. And once your partner feels that way, you can’t really talk him out of it. Here are really dumb ways people rationalize cheating, that just don’t work.
If you got a pass
Maybe you and your partner have a deal where if you ever run into this celebrity, or are under certain circumstances (on international ground, etc…) you’re allowed to cheat. Maybe if your partner says you have a pass, just so long as he approves of the person, you think you can cheat. But if you do take him up on that, don’t be surprised if your relationship is never the same again. Just because you have a pass, doesn’t mean you should take it.
If he cheated first
What’s that saying again? Two wrong’s don’t make a…very unhealthy and volatile relationship whole again? Ah yeah, it was something like that. If he cheats, and you cheat to get back at him, you just added two to four years of couples counseling to your already long bout in therapy you were going to need to get past the first infidelity.
If you don’t have sex
So you just kissed or you just did some other, errr, stuff. Do you really think that will leave your partner thinking, “Oh. Well so long as my partner didn’t let the guy put his penis inside of her, I feel like I can totally still trust her. There is nothing intimate about interacting with someone’s genitals in the other ways. We’re cool.”???
If you don’t make physical contact
Maybe you don’t make physical contact at all. But you’ve sent a lot of messages about the type of physical contact you’d like to have. You’ve had email sex, text sex, Facebook messenger sex, Skype sex…just about every type of cyber sex possible. Just because you didn’t have skin-to-skin contact doesn’t mean your partner won’t feel betrayed.
If you don’t tell the person you like him
Maybe you don’t even tell a guy you like him. But you do share with him very personal information about yourself and your relationship. You flirt with him like crazy, send him some rather revealing photos and say everything shy of, “I want you.” When you say, “Nothing ever happened!” do you think that will comfort your partner? Your partner who found a photo of you in a bra and panties that you sent to another man with the caption “Thinking of you?”
If you haven’t stated that you’re exclusive
Sometimes you can get away with this excuse. But should you really have to state you’re exclusive with somebody—somebody you’ve been dating for months, seeing most nights of the week, and meeting the friends and family of—to know you probably shouldn’t sleep with someone else? Do you really feel there was no type of loyalty or obligation there, all because those little words weren’t exchanged?
If you’re not married yet
This idea should have died a long time ago, along with the concept of “giving a bride away” and asking for permission from the father to marry a woman. They all play into the same concept that when you marry someone, they own you, and before that, you’re “Free.”
If it’s an ex
Someone you had to wrap up old business with, huh? Maybe that’s an excuse. Or hey, I’ve even heard people say, “If I don’t sleep with a new person who I’ve never slept with before it’s not really cheating.” I’m not saying it’s okay—I’m just saying I’ve heard it.
If you’re on a break
Just one question: when have you heard of someone having sex with somebody else, while on a break from their partner, and that not ruining absolutely everything once they got back with their partner? Exactly.
If you were drunk
Some say you’re not yourself when you’re drunk. I say you’re more yourself than ever and you let out your real desires and show your true character. When you’re drunk, you don’t have your usual faculties that stop you from doing stupid things and people can see what you’d really do if you felt uninhibited. If you cheat drunk, you’d cheat sober one day.
If you were in another country
What does that have to do with anything? Were you in another body, too? Did your soul take over one of the local citizen’s bodies while you were in Japan, and so you were allowed to cheat? Just because you were trying all new things doesn’t mean you were allowed to try a whole new person.
If he was sexually neglecting you
Sometimes people point to sexual neglect within their relationship as an excuse for cheating. But being unsatisfied in a relationship doesn’t give you an excuse to cheat. Then you just have the issue of why you and your partner weren’t having sex, in addition to the cheating, to deal with.
If “It’s been over for a while, we just haven’t ended it”
Again: being unhappy in a relationship is no excuse to cheat. In fact, people act as if that’s so unique—to cheat because you’re unhappy at home. That’s the main reason people cheat! If you do that once, you’ll do it again, the next time you’re unhappy in your relationship.
If you haven’t said, “I love you”
Once again: why do you need to exchange words like, “We’re exclusive now” or “I love you” to understand that it would seriously hurt the person you’re dating if you slept with somebody else?
If it was just one time
You don’t have to have a full-blown affair to cheat. When you cheat, you cross a line. You only have to cheat once to cross that line. Once you’re over that line, the person you cheated on really doesn’t care how far you crossed it.