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About six months ago, my sister ran into some financial issues while she was on a trip out of the country and asked if she could borrow some money. I said yes with no hesitation given the situation, and she explained that she’d simply underestimated her expenses while she was away and it wouldn’t happen again.
But it did, a lot.
A week after my sister returned from her trip she returned the money I let her borrow and about a week after she was asking to borrow again. She said the setback while she was traveling had had a trickle down effect with some of her other bills and she should be good after this loan. I told her I understood, and sent her some cash again.
Over the past few months, that type of back and forth has become a constant. Every time she asks to borrow there’s a new circumstance that warrants her need for cash, and not wanting to make her feel worse for having to depend on someone else I simply send her the money, she pays it back, and we move on (until she asks again). The main reason I always lend the money is because of my nephews. I can’t bear the thought of them going without when I have the means to help their mother; however I recently found out that my sister has still been traveling quite a bit over the course of this extended lending period.
I was talking to my mother the other day and she told me my sister was on a cruise somewhere — I don’t think I even heard the location because as soon as she said cruise I became irritated. When my mother followed up with one of those, “That girl stays on the go” remarks, I decided to visit her Facebook page and see exactly where she’s been going. There’d been at least three sets of vacation pics since my initial loan, prompting me to ask my mother, “If she can afford all of these trips why is she always asking me to borrow money?” My mom then proceeded to guilt me with some “Baby Boy”-like line about my sister needing to have a life too outside of being a single mother and saying if she always pays me back on time why do I care.
I’m not trying to create tension between me and my sister — or my mother for that matter — but I can’t deny my sister’s irresponsible approach to getting away (using my money to do it) is getting to me. My family seems to think because I have money I should always be willing to come up off of it, but I don’t travel have as much as she does and I have the money to do it, not to mention no kids. I’m all about my sister having balance but I’d prefer she balance her budget better to do it and leave me out of it. What should I do?
