Signs He’s Financially Cheating
No couple likes to talk about money, but after a certain point in a relationship, money talk becomes inevitable. Living your life with someone has to mean having some shared financial goals. How are you supposed to, for example, purchase a house together if only one of you is saving for your half of the down payment? You can’t very well buy half of a house. And how are you supposed to even qualify for a mortgage if one of you keeps her credit card use low and pays it off on time, while the other has accrued a tremendous amount of credit card debt? It’s easy to quickly see how your financial futures become entwined which is why not talking about money is not an option. Of course, there’s no guarantee your partner will abide by the rules. Here are signs your partner is financially cheating on you.
He hates when you throw away mail
He is interested in the dozens of credit card offers that arrive every week, so he doesn’t like it when you throw the mail away. He’s likely signed up for more credit cards than you’re aware of.
He insists on getting the mail
Because he knows there may be credit card bills for cards you didn’t know he had, letters from debt collectors, or letters from banks regarding loans he secretly applied for.
He has you sign for smaller purchases
He always insists your name be on small purchases you need to finance like big screen televisions or a shared car. This is likely because he knew if the vendor ran his credit, you wouldn’t be approved for the purchase.
He has a storage space you’ve never been to
He has a storage space that he won’t let you see. He’s vague about what he keeps in there. He may be storing all of the things he buys on those secret credit cards that you’re not supposed to know about.
He gets mad when you bring up money
He seems personally offended when you bring up the topic of money. When someone is cheating—whether it’s sexually, financially, or emotionally—and you bring up the thing/person they may be cheating with, they usually turn it around on you and say you’re being mean.
Refusal to have a joint account
You’ve been together for a very long time, and it would be pretty useful if, when you needed to make a large purchase for the both of you, you could just do it from a joint account. But he refuses to open one because he doesn’t want you to see the large withdrawals he makes. Or the tiny deposits.
He takes phone calls outside
These could be from debt collectors, credit card companies demanding payment, or loan centers calling about an application he just filed.
He doesn’t want to go out for dinner/travel
Based on what he says he makes at his job and has in savings, you two should be able to go out to dinner a couple times a week. But he always has some reason (other than money) that he’d rather stay in.
He never has cash
If he is living on credit cards alone and doesn’t have the hard cash to back them up, then he won’t have the bills when you dine somewhere that only accepts cash.
He set up a P.O. box
So he can keep his bills and purchases private. This way, you won’t see mail regarding the stock you didn’t know he invested in or the credit card you didn’t know he opened.
He insists on handling the bills
He doesn’t want you to ever see his bills because he buys things you know nothing about. So, under the pretense of “being helpful” he insists on handling all of the bills.
You find out his parents lent him money
You find out his parents lent him money. He didn’t tell you about it, though, and based on what he says, he shouldn’t have to borrow money from anybody.
He resists meeting with a financial advisor
Meeting with a financial advisor is the equivalent to him of taking a very long lie detector test. He won’t be able to tell her all of the things she needs to know, because that would out him.
He’s secretive about taxes
Because he likely has investments and income you know nothing about, expenses you know nothing about, and losses you know nothing about.
He’s suddenly interested in stocks/bonds
He’s suddenly very interested in how a certain stock is doing. Could it be that he invested some of the money he promised to save for a house, in that stock?