Black Men Who Refuse to Date Black Women: TODAY on “Life Changers”

120 comments
October 27, 2011 ‐ By

UDPATE: This show will be broadcasting on Friday, Oct. 28 at 3:00 and 3:30 pm.

Dr. Drew’s set is going to explode tomorrow. On his talk show “Life Changers,” an audience of all black men and women will be crammed into one tiny studio to discuss not just interracial dating, but black men who refuse to date inside their race. Yes. The beating up of the single black woman in the national media continues.

The short preview of Part 1 of the episode below doesn’t show much, but a few typical comments in the interracial dating debate can be heard. For example:

A black female guest tells the men “we’re feeling rejected,” and “we’re tired of it.” A black male guest gets in her face and says, “I don’t like your attitude.” Yes, we have tread these tired waters before. Most of us are over this.

But I feel sorry for this particular woman actually, because she still cares. I remember when I used to feel rejected when I’d hear a black man make a comment to the tune of “that’s why I’m going to get a white girl,” or “that’s why I stopped dating black girls.” The idea that a white woman has something better to offer over a black woman just didn’t sit well with me at all until I finally realized:

That’s his problem, not mine.

Am I really missing out on a guy who puts his fingers in my face or who has to be held back by a panel member (who by the way is the only black male matchmaker, Paul Carrick Brunson), in front of a live studio audience? Is a man who says he prefers white women over black women because they are more subservient really for me? Do I really want to procreate with a man who is more concerned with the texture of his future children’s hair than the mental and spiritual qualities his partner possesses? If a black man can so easily write us all off for the transgressions of black women from his past before getting to know us as individuals, isn’t he the one in need of help?

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  • Katherine

    If everybody would stay with their own race, there wouldn’t be a problem!!! Birds of the feather flocks together. Dogs & cats don’t breed!!

  • Anthony

    This needs to be read: I wouldn’t say the black race is beyond repair, being a black male, I feel all races have their own share of issues back that is another topic, I can agree to disagree on the issue you are stating but drama comes in all relationship there is no perfect couple there are only couples who are committed to one another that have successful marriages, or relationships, we are flawed as a human race regardless of how successful or how much money we have but we can’t be judgemental, There are truly some good woman out there in the world that have good hearts and are waiting for a good black man, we have to do the searching, as it says in the bible a man that finds a good wife finds a good thing, also nice guys need to really learn patience it is one of our strong qualites without it we would be impatient and bitter willing to settle for anything.

    As for the ghetto, dramafide (not sure if that is a word, Lol), loud mouth black woman out there we truly can’t judge them, example if you picture a young girl growing up in a not so good neighborhood who only had a single mom who was uneducated never had a positve male in her life to influence her was raised by television and the bad environments, you can’t really be surprise as to what they become when they get older. Some of these woman need a positive male influence who is nice and charming and not afraid to speak the truth. I have seen honest nice guys turn a so called ghetto girl into a respectable woman who learn the values and respect of a positive role model, now don’t get me wrong I said some not all, but really everyone deserve a chance, we have been so brain washed that we look at looks and body types, I mean we are men after all but we really should be looking at the heart.

    I would so choose an okay woman with a good heart even if she has kids then a very attractive woman with no heart at all. Nice guys there is a time to be nice and at time to be honest, women don’t need a nice guy 24/7. We need to step up cause we sure are good at complaining about not finding a good woman but will not put the effort to give them a chance because they don’t meet our standards, really life is too short to be picky, now I’m not saying settle for anything but give them a chance you will know if they are good for you or not but read the book first not just the cover. Hope this helps any nice guy out there who truly wants to find someone and all the fake nice guys (please stop destroying our endangered species.)

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-Muthapukkin-Tinney/100001244269956 Anthony blak martian Tinney

    “SHAMING TACTIC”

  • Eric

    It has nothing to do with the hair textute. It has to do with black women’s attitudes and personality issues. They choose the thug type guys over the good ones. So no its not the black man’s fault its the black women’s fault. They need to change in this day and age instead of think its not there fault. A lot of black women look good on the outside but its the inside that realy counts and black women as of right now look pretty dirty inside right now. If u clean that mess up then black guys will come to u.

  • Dave Morrison II

    So black men date other races because they want black women to be jealous and black women do the same to make black men jealous..This is why I lost all faith in the black people.

  • JaysabethWaRd

    i hear black woman say im get a white dude thatz going to treat me right but if a black dude do the same thing he weak ,not man enough or just have no back bone black woman today have no loyalty to i my white brothers coming from a black man they just ratz lookin for chesse she dont care bout u

  • http://www.facebook.com/medb.pony Mohamed Bayo

    The issue is that these speak of a dark, and bitter resentment that has simply turned into a hatred that they are ashamed of expressing. When I say hatred, I will break it down. They are a lot of hard working black men and young men alike working towards changing their lives and not making a lot of mistakes that we see in the black community. In a city like New York, polite hardworking black men are looked at like an unwanted step-child by black women whom appear not to know them at all. They try ghetto-like girls and the answer is, “You ain’t bad enough. You’re a soft n*****.” Meanwhile what seems to be the educated and modern black females would reject them and treat them like crap because they don’t have the BMW parked in his garage or making that $100,000+ income. You know what happens to him once he is successful, he will totally decline any black woman’s relationship because she’s simply there for the new acquired material ($$$). I am black my self and I’ve experienced this too, but I’m still hoping for a change of ideologies whithin our communities.

  • thegreatdizzle

    It’s funny who black women are criticizing these black men for doing something that black women have been doing in the media FOR DECADES!!!

    • guest

      how so?

  • Opinionated4Days

    Being fully recovered from my own case of “Waiting to Exhale” syndrome—was wholly devasted @ the age of 20 when the fella I was diggin opted for his European Descendant because in his words; “she’s safer”—I can concur with this brilliant author of this article. “They” ARE doing us Black Queens a favor! On SO MANY LEVELS. And shoot! Nothing against ‘alternative lifestyles’….but let’s just be glad for the men that still even WANT women. Her ethnicity is about as important as her hair color—not at all. Don’t take it personally Sisters. Just be glad if you were spared the psychological rejection that *literally* almost broke my own confidence in ALL men in general. 

  • T_bedford_2000

    Having only recently become aware of the proliferation of BWE web sites and the acronym DBR, my first response was shock at the tone of them. I generally don’t blog and I generally don’t post, but after getting over my initial shock (at the hostile rhetoric) I am looking at these sites in a more nuanced way. If the intent is to reach back into the hood and warn young black girls about the perils they face, then there is some honor in that. But to the extent that some of the patrons of these sites are angry and frustrated and seeking to cause hurt, that is not a good thing. It is true there are too many DBR black men and too many DBR black women. The difference is that the DBR black men do commit large volumes of senseless violence and they do wreak havoc on their communities in ways that the DBR female does not. To be honest, I am not comfortable using the term DBR – it is such a perjorative term. But if that’s the language of the conversation, here I am. It would be a good thing if the young black girl in the hood could have greater dating options. Almost anything would beat what’s right outside her door. But in reality we know that’s not practical. How many young white guys from the burbs are going to go to the projects to see their girlfreinds. Not only would that be unwise for him, it would be unsafe. 

  • LilDove

    Right and everyone’s dream is to live in the “hood”.

  • http://twitter.com/rewith85man Ernest DeBrew III

    I wonder if those black guys really find white women or others outside their race that easily. 

    Sometimes, it can be difficult because of cultural difference. 

    To me, I look at the heart and personality. I do not want to get caught up with race and appearance. 

    That is what really matters.

  • whylie2010

    I think men like this have mommy issues at the root (as far as men who totally rule out women of the same race – Black, White or otherwise). They have to have issues with their mothers to say and behave like they hate women of their own race. Just my two cents…

    PS – I have also encountered White men who have the same hateful attitude towards White women. Again, mommy issues…

  • http://www.facebook.com/schlonte.mcgee Schlonte' McGee

    I almost jumped ship so I can relate some black women are a special breed so a lot of the anger and pain we deal with as black people just leaks into our relationships and personally my dealings with other races is that it is easier because these issues aren't compounded but respected, so I believe that's why a lot of black men will choose to be with a woman of another race. But black women are always going to suffer more in the relationship game just due to sheer numbers they out number black men and that's what puzzles me why not expand your chances for a successful relationship by dating other races because happiness has no color.

  • SayCheese

    I really hate men like the ones on the show. I just hope their White, Asian or Hispanic wife or girlfriend is still allowed to see her family and have a relationship with her Dad or Mother. Or if their kids are treated the same as the other grandchildren that are full Black or White. No one like's to talk about the racism coming from the family.

    Not all IR relationships are the same way. But I notice if the woman White she always gets the bad end of the relationship. Which results in her being cut off from family or her father disowning her because she's with a non White. I want to here her side of the relationship. It might be gold and glitter for him. But if her father doesn't like you (boyfriend or husband) and she hasn't seen her family in years. Something isn't right and it's unfair.

    • Smdh

      I'm mixed and I actually experienced more racism from the black side of my family than the white side. Yes, my white grandparents had a few issues with their daughter marrying a black man early on, but they quickly set that aside & accepted me as their grandchild. It was my black grandparents that were too close-minded to have a white daughter-in-law and half white granddaughter and for that reason I have never had a relationship with my father's side of the family.

  • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

    "The different is THEY don't. Black people's biggest problem is that we can't keep our f**king business to ourselves."

    @Meech Lynn……BRAVO SISTER!

  • https://www.facebook.com/MeechesPeaches Meech Lynn

    Korey, this happens all the time to me. Black men make an actual EFFORT to make sure I realize they're disinterested, and a lot of times disgusted. Then I show up with my white husband and suddenly I have their undivided attention. Suddenly they need to know what I'm all about. No interest before. So my guess is that these are the black men who want what white men have. This is a situation far more about White Men and what they perceive White Men as having, than it is about Black Women. People will never tell you the truth about things of this nature, but they will SHOW you, without realizing it.

  • http://www.facebook.com/barbara.codner Barbara Codner

    I can totally understand if a BM with a good head on his shoulders says that he's disappointed in BW and what SOME of us have become. As a BW, I have seen things that I'm not proud of. :-( I can admit that!!

    Fellas if the only BW you know or associate with are ghetto, then shame on you!! That just goes to show how ghetto you are and your willingness to gravitate towards ghetto women. No one is perfect but I personally know BW that are good enough to get to know and even marry. You can bring them home and be proud of them!!

    Now, the BM with the dreads had an opportunity to show his character and he took that opportunity to disrespect the BW in the red dress. Why? What did she say or do to make him believe that was ok?

    The bottom line is: Look at the character of the man making these claims against BW. Most of them are not worthy of any woman.

  • jonnie

    most white men abuse their black women anyway.

    • https://www.facebook.com/MeechesPeaches Meech Lynn

      huh? I've never been abused by a white man.

      I bet you've never assumed anything bad about white on white relationships, have you? Dismissed.

  • http://www.facebook.com/barbara.codner Barbara Codner

    Cheers to you!!!

  • Halima

    Everyone including black men can date whoever they want to date but this black woman bashing has gotten out of a hand a long time ago. I don’t even know why black women would go on that show. Let these bitter bm do as they please. Bw need o stop chasing after them making it seem like they are our only option. I have dated and currently dating a non black man and I have yet come across one that says half the things some black men say about black women.

    • CRAIG

      The HILARIOUS part about this is neither you, nor Evia, can see the forest for the trees. Let me put this way: Interracial dating/marriage, as far as you're concerned, can't happen unless black women are dragging black men through the mud. Still, if it makes you feel better, while there are DAMAGED BEYOND REPAIR black men, there are just as many DAMAGED BEYOND REPAIR black women.

      If you're the wrong Halima, which I doubt, then I apologize for everything I just said, but if ARE the Halima I'm speaking of, you can kiss my BLACK ASS.

  • http://www.recessionproofmarriage.blogspot.com MarriageBlog4u

    Just watched both episodes and still confused. The reality is that black women and men will always have 'issues'. Why? Because as a culture we are disconnected and when you bring that into a relationship it simply will not work. All of these women want to marry black men but the [understandable] anger and hurt prevents black men from viewing them as marriage material. ALL men of all ethnic backgrounds tend to be attracted to women that exhibit a calm and loving temperament and the women on this show today did not show that quality. THAT is why they have a hard time finding a man. Visit: http://www.recessionproofmarriage.blogspot.com

    • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

      Yes I believe we need to first address and resolve the issues we have in our black community before we can move to the next stage of addressing issues with BM/BW, dating, relationships etc….as long as we continue to behave in such a manner it will always keep us divided as a group. Furthermore as human beings we need to stop disrepecting each other and presenting it to the world to see. This behavior attracts the undesirables who believe in the "conquer and divide" mentality. The Dr. Drew show is just and example of that.

      Again, date who you want to date and love who you want to love but I just say do it for the right reasons. Furthermore if you do not choose to date outside of your race that is cool too. Every individual need to decide what path is right for them. I just say have the right attitude and be in the right state of mind when doing it. Clearly there are many people who are not.

  • HARDMIKE

    Well thank you for stating that you believe attractive black women are superficial, however you obvious don't think the same applies to men, if you think about it, do you think upwardly mobile highly desired white men are going to overlook his white counterpart or discount her entirely? Its amazing really when you really think about it, some women will date a type of man they wouldn't date in their own race, for example some women wont date a nerd if he's black because he would be a lame a square or boring but will date a nerd if he is another race because they know that he is the "cream of the crop" as you say. I see the hypocrisy all the time, whites are the biggest abusers of drugs, yet how often do you hear some complain about black men who do? Whites are 70% more likely to commit sexual offenses, a white male is 7 times more likely to molest a child, but you never hear about it. Whites account for more than 85% of illegal drug use, yet no one says a single word about it. Just stop with the bull and admit that you believe that everything european is better, , society, cars, education,skin tone, clothing, homes,hair texture, if you didn't you would not put the emphasis on race as opposed to attributes.

  • caramelchick1

    You have to stand up and fight against it because black women are being treated differently especially in theses stores that have black men sales clerks that have that inpatient attitude toward black women that walk in. They think they are justified and that the law will support their discrimination because of the "black women have attitudes" stereotype and other whites around them will act accordingly feuled off of this prejudiced enbittered black man that dates outside of his race.

  • caramelchick1

    So true Korey, well said. If I was the white woman he was with, I would want him to be with me because he loves me regardless of race. It would draw an insecurity if ever a nice attractive black female came around. Alot times they bash to make their white women feel secure that he wont leave them for a black woman who they feel are beneath them. So he learns to bash to feed her racist ego insecurities. I felt this one day I was in a store and this black guy checked me out, and his white GF came up and started hugging him and talking to him to keep him from checking me out. guarantee she got him to bash black women to feel secure that it was nothing to it. Its the same concept when an exgirlfriend comes around, the man has to bash her to make the new GF feel he will never go back to her.

  • caramelchick1

    They mostly speak about black features that they have themselves and act like black features are black womens fault. Didnt God create us all, including black features and black hair? I believe the man was created first and then woman created from the man, so it appears black men if anyone would be where black features and hair started from if you look at it that way. True, we dont need these dudes but they are not going to leave their hate onto black women collectively because they want to date other races..you can do that just like other men of other races without trashing black women and leaving us with everybody looking at us sideways in agreement because we wont fight back. Such judgements have cause black women to be discriminated against and abused. There was this one black guy who assaulted a blac female and his defense was, he dont like black women so its a lie…making it okay to commit a hate crime against this woman because she is black. Their judgements will create us to be devalued and hated by others, cant ignore it

  • caramelchick1

    Black men that date outside of their race act if they are doing something special, as if pretty biracial kids cant be made from a black woman and a non black man. They act like my kid looks better than your black kid because they are birracial as if black women cant make birracial kids with so called good hair. This is why many that have black kids and birracial kids will treat the birracial kids better despite the black kid being of his flesh too. They hate their own flesh because its black and blame it all on black women. But, I refuse to absorb that lying judgement of self hate. Sad but true. .

    • https://www.facebook.com/MeechesPeaches Meech Lynn

      I have bi-racial kids and you better believe they don't see themselves as 'better' because of it. But I'm a black woman. I have noted that bi-racial kids with black fathers tend to be more conceited than the ones with black mothers. Not always, but there is a glaring difference overall.

  • caramelchick1

    They say black women are loud and have attitudes..I have worked with white women who loud and obnoxious and inpatient but black men will say its because they are tired or upset, they refuse to call it attitude. Point is you have to analyze the BS excuses from black men because for every complaint against black women, there are black women that are available that don’t fit their excuses. But they choose to overlook them because its more about race and feeling black is less than and white is better and improved, even when they act in the same manner that they are complaining about. So, the black female bashing is becoming another tired excuse of black men who are full of excuses for everything. Everytime I hear black women this and that..I quickly say “Not All! just like not all black men are dumb, steal, or have guns, so that’s an excuse” …That’s just what you want to do anyway, you have an attitude yourself.” to shut the BS down.

  • caramelchick1

    If that’s their only problem, as they say, then there are many black women with soft hair texture and wear their natural hair and there are white women that wear extensions also, so that is an excuse. There are also Ethiopian black women that have a wavy hair texture, but they are not migrating toward these black women who don’t fit their excuse, so that’s a scapegoat excuse. They say white women are nicer, as if black women collectively are ALL mean- but there are plenty of nice black women. They can date foreign black women who are not native to American ways, such as many African women who are primarily raised to be traditionally submissive to their men, but they don’t, so thats an excuse because such black women are available and they act as if they are not.

  • caramelchick1

    Alot of this black female bashing is a scapegoat for whats really going on. For every reason they say they date outside their race, there are black women that meets those ideals but they act as if those qualities dont exist in black women. If that is true, so that would mean white people are justified about every racist idea they have held toward black men. But black men would disagree about racist thoughts against them, as long as its against black women, its okay. For instance, some complain about black hair and weave- black women did not create black hair and black men have black hair! As if they don’t have black hair and it urks them to even touch black women hair but they have the same hair growing out of their heads! Such idiots.

    • HARDMIKE

      You could replace men with women and women with men and the same would be true. And your comment about weave is incoherent I suppose because you're trying to defend it, gasp, some men don't like women with weave, shocking isnt it?

      • LilDove

        I think it is more about the fact that in the grand scheme of life some of those differences are in reality quite small and NOT JUST RELEGATED to BW’s and not BM and vice versa.
        Every person is different. That’s okay as long as someone isn’t being a jerk and making a fool of himself/herself.

    • SayCheese

      Oh I forgot to mention Cornel West and Don King with their lighting shocked afros. Some people need to questions their choice of hair styles too. Or the why do some Black guys like to wear waves in their hair. Walking around with a stocking cap all day to get waves. I don't want to wake up in the morning and see what looks to be pubes in the sink. Oh wait that's just Black guy hair from their heads.

  • caramelchick1

    You have to debate it because people share offenses and will treat you badly because if someone else offense. So you cant just ignore it, thinking it will go away and take care of itself, but black women will be treated worse by society at large more so because of these negative images that need to be addressed and called out as the BS it is. The balck women just need to adapt their debate skills and try to leave the emotion out of it. These black men have to be questioned and their answers analyzed.

  • Truth Hurts

    I doubt that yo uare qualified to make a judgement like that , you dont know what you're talking about, you're just another chick running your mouth.

    • https://www.facebook.com/MeechesPeaches Meech Lynn

      "just another chick running her mouth." That demonstrates the intellectual capacity of a 4 year old. I guess when you're too dumb to actually retort, you reach for some pre-fabricated insult that you think insulates you from having to think.

  • http://twitter.com/CocoRashaan @CocoRashaan

    I could not care less ! Neither do I date black men anyway !

    • Scribble

      Then aren't you as bad as the guys everyone here is complaining about?

      But, unsurprisingly, no one has said anything to you. The double standard lives on….

  • kakaruchi

    who cares??? I can't believe there are black women that waste their time on this mess. Let them go. Here's a secret….THERE ARE OTHER MEN. I hate when black women see a black man with a white women and get bent out of shape. "That Coulda been my man". Coulda, Woulda and Shoulda! Get over it. Things happen for a reason. Maybe those type of men aren't for you. Maybe yours is coming. LOL Maybe not. O well. Life goes on so live it

  • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

    @Justanotherguy….Preach it brother!

  • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

    Amen sister!

  • Over It

    I'm so over it….I don't see one black man that's with a white woman who I'd want for myself. *yawn*

  • lala

    Damn!!!!!!! what i have been trying to say for years, you just said it korey, i need to print this ish out!!!! Thanks for this uplifting message korey

  • http://www.facebook.com/XxWarriorGoddess1981xX Natasha Hope Thomas

    I'm over this black men saying negative stuff about black women anyway, they're just being ignorant to generalize us just because they seen what other black women do like talking loud and cursing. I glad I have a black boyfriend who doesn't generalize and he's been with a couple of black women who did him dirty. Date whoever you want, just shut up if you can't stand BW.

    • HARDMIKE

      I suppose you fail to see the irony of your statement.

  • paula

    Who gives a rat's a@@ what these DBR (damaged beyond repair) BM think, want or refuse to do. We BW have moved on from this insanity.

  • http://twitter.com/CandiiRainz Candii Rainz

    It's sad that these men are playing into the IGNORANCE of racism against their own race! But come on…how RELEVANT IS THEIR OPINION. Black women are BEAUTIFUL! All WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!! Men like them really hate themselves, and are negative and insecure, and any woman that ends up with these type of men should be very careful…..to say the least.

  • Keep it Real

    They should do a show about white and nonblack men who REFUSE to date black women but date every other race of women. Those black men are not alone. lol

    Secondly BLACK MEN HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF FOR DATING INTERRACIALLY. British Black men and Black men in EVERY industrialized country in the world are dating white and non black women 3x the the rate of Black American men. Non black American men are dating white and interracially at 2x the rate of American black men. I will say it again. There is not as much resentment and hostility from British black women and black women around the world because non black men are open to dating and marrying (30% of British black women marry interracially) those black women. U.S.-born Latino men, we find that intermarriage rates are much higher. Nearly, (46%) of married, U.S.-born Asians, and over half (39%) of U.S.-born Latinos men are inter-racially married, and most often, the intermarriage is with a white partner. Yet, daily blogs and TV shows complaining from their women. This gender conflict in the U.S. from black women and is about American black women dating and marriage options. Let's find out why these men of other races won't date and marry American Black women at the same rate they do other industrialized countries.

    • Keep it Real

      Correction

      Yet, NO daily blogs and TV shows complaining from their women.

      • Reese

        But also I think it has to do with more availible men for them in there race to date. 30% of black men have some kind of record and we don't want to deal with. You take away 30% of any other race's of men it will impact them the same way because alot of people only date withen there race.

        • Keep it Real

          Ok, but to be fair how many black women can you eliminate from the dating pool. See it works both ways. How, many black women are obese? How many of them are on aid with multiple kids uneducated, unskilled and unemployed. Honestly, that's why some of these non women date black men. They have less competition.

          I'll be the first to admit that a lot of black men are bums but only 19% of black women have a degree. Half of them are obese OR with kids.

          • DeepThinker

            But these same black men that snub their noses up at obese black women, will date an obese, unattractive white or hispanic woman, with no money so what's your point?

            • Keep it Real

              When I see a black guy with a fat white woman I think the same thing I think when I see a black guy with a fat black woman. That was the best he could do. Doesn't mean he wanted a fat woman he probably just wanted a white woman and a fat white woman was the best he could do. There are some guys who want fat woman but most who prefer all things equal that same woman curvy instead of fat. JMO

          • Korey

            I have a degree and about to go for another one. And I am not obese, matter of fact I am on the thin side. And there hasn't been an occupant in my womb. And yet… I'm unattached.

            What's your point sir?

            • Keep it Real

              Only 19% of black women have degrees. that's less than 2 out of 10 in other words 81% of black women don't have a degree. If you add no kids and weight proportion to height you're the exception to the rule. Only maybe 10% of black women fit into your category. The issue with you is probably not that you can't get a man the issue is that you can't get the type of man you want. The question is why is it that the men you want don't want you? Maybe it's all the loser black men, however nothing is stopping you from dating outside of your race. Now, if you also can't find a non black man. You probably might want to reevaluate and make some comprises on your man requirements. Maybe you don't meet the requirements of the type of man you want.

              • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

                Maybe its the fact that our society has change greatly and is breaking down so badly therefore it may be the type of men being produced. I am referring to all race of men. You ever thought about that?

                • LilDove

                  Agreed.

      • Reese

        But I agree they can date who they want to date. But you would be surprised by how many of us are aproached by non bm. And are marrying nonbm. The faster growing ir couples are bw.

    • Reese

      Or non bw who refuse to date nonbm because there are alot of them. You do know that ww don't date bm at the same rate they date hispanics. And Asian women don't date bw at the same rate they do bm. Bm can date who they want. I have no problem dating nonbm and neither do other bw and that is why most women on the site are like so what.

      • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

        Exactly…….They doing there thing and we doing our thing. Again, its there chose and I personally do not have a problem with it.

    • https://www.facebook.com/MeechesPeaches Meech Lynn

      You're one of those black men who get pissed off when they see me with a white guy. I can honestly say that I'm going to begin to enjoy that because of you from now on…

    • LilDove

      I don’t mind interracial marriage/dating. But when a guy sums up their reasons up to really petty things that occur in people regardless of race. Well maybe it’s time to seek out different options and DO something about it first instead of bashing out of emotional judgment.

  • DeepThinker

    From what I've seen they are not pulling the 8-10s of other groups either unless they are rich and even then do they rarely pull an above-average looking non-black woman unless she is dirt poor and/or uneducated. NEXT!

    • Boomboomroom

      Exactly!!

  • Jay

    I cared for a while but not at all anymore. Be with someone who wants to be with you. Be with someone who values you.

  • Marcus

    Isnt this what MADAM NOIRE pushes to black women every day. This site is filled with why white men are better than black men threads and Madam noire wants to actually try to make this a case of a few house negros who dont date black women into an issue.

    The irony of this kind of a thread on a site that pushes the same thing is comedy. Black men have different tastes in women like many black women who only date white men, which is obvious from this site and its many articles. To ascribe this case to all black men is comedy but that is what this site does.

    Madamm Noire Has no place to even make this an issue because that is all Saddam Noire writers and editors really talk about. The site pushes and exemplifies the same thing that these black men on that show exemplify and I have read the same statement in articles on this site that have echoed what these men have said. The difference is that this site is a black female site which pushes that message and wants to take umbrage at others pushing that same message.

    So give us a break, this site is so two faced when it comes to black men that anything these writers write should be taken with a grain of salt. A site that pushes the same a forum about being angry at black men who state the same thing that I have read in Saddam Noires articles is almost the height of hypocrisy.

  • Da Da

    Hey, DAT's DEENA JACOBS from dat Kim Kardashian big booty H8R rant up there!!! This is gonna be funny!!!

    • Jazzyphay21

      The dude with the dreads is crazybrah or crazybra from youtube smh I'm not surprised about his stance

  • Miss Charlie

    For every black man that refuses to date a black woman, there's another man of another race willing to give us a try. They are out there. A bit hard to find, but out there!

    • Geroge

      Hard to find because they ain't out there.

  • msknowitall

    It’s unfair to categorize all black men based on the ignorant views of 5 black men. Date whomever you want, case closed.NEXT!

  • dvine

    what i don't understand is why this white man decided to do a show about black men hating black women.. who does that.. oh , someone who needs ratings.. will they do a show about white men who hate white women next?!

    • Likewaterforchoc

      Because this topic is all the rage now. Because it is open season on black women. EVERYONE seems to be concerned about black women's dating and marriage prospects or lack thereof. The media feeds into this machine by perpetuating the thought that black women in general are undesirables.

  • bhillboy37

    It's BS- how all the women comment on here about black men refusing to date black women but you all applaud when a black women says she refuses to date black men. A lot of black women who frequent this site and talk bad about black have an outlandish sense of entitlement and fairness. It's fair for bw's to call black men broke, cheater, uneducated, undercover gay and everything else but you all get your panties in a bunch when you get it like you give it. I personally don't date or mate with white women but I can see why someone would because you all are irrational to the UMPTEENTH DEGREE. The Dr. Drew show could have easily featured bw's not into bm's as well. Every other day on this site there's a story designed to divide bw and bm by playing up bw's best attributes and playing up bm's worst attributes and for the most part, black women are the main ones on MN cheering it on. Saying black men aren't worthy or are inferior to white men. It just astounds me that black women can be so pissed at this article and the Dr. Drew show when you say the same things about black men as these black men say about you. In my opinion you are both out of your minds.

    • reese

      99% of us This is another reason why bw date out is because their belief that bm no longer want them. And they are using these articles as proof that bm no longer want us. I think it is another perception difference. I think the message is aimed at bw who refuse to look outside the race because so many are single and they are attempting to help bw. But I think the problem is overstated here. Or maybe it is a justification for some bw who are dating outside the race or want too. You might disagree on whether it is true, but that is the perception that some bw have.

      • reese

        Some how the first part of the article got deleted. 99% of us don't care if you read the articles.

  • AllyC

    LOL, they ARE ugly!!! Get out of here with that. Have you ever noticed that it's usually mostly unattractive black men who won't date black women??

  • jjac401

    Well said sista!

  • Candy

    Why do women fall for this? Why do these bitter men make you angry? I'm just fine if these men with obvious issues would like to stereotype themselves into a smaller dating pool. I enjoy dating all races. A couple years ago in the club, i was smiling at this one good looking guy. All of a sudden, this black man comes up and says, 'sorry, i don't date black women'. I had to ask him who cared. Turns out i was smiling in his direction! Never mind the smile was for the cute Korean guy behind him. He got all offended when i told him that, but i got the guy i wanted to come over later, so i forgot all about him.

  • GUEST

    AND YOU ONLY NEED ONE MAN TO FALL IN LOVE AND MARRY…NOT A PANEL OF BROTHERS WHO ARENT WORTH DIRT PROFESSING THERE LOVE FOR YOU…SMH

  • GUEST

    im mad these girls even did the show…..THE MORE BLACK WOMEN GO ON THESE SHOWS THE MORE SOCIETY THINKS SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH US..I AM NOT GOING TO DEFEND MY FEMENITY TO DUDES WHO ARE CLEARLY MISGUIDED…AS FAR AS IM CONCERNED THIS TOPIC AND SUBJECT IS DEAD…AND I SUGGEST ALL YOU SISTERS DUE THE SAME…AND THAT INCLUDES YOU ALSO MIS MADAM NOIRE STOP WRITING ALL THIS NEGATIVE ISH AND POINTING OUT WHAT SOCIETY THINKS OF US…

    • virtualvenus

      Who care what "society" thinks of US…. Do you think you're wonderful…Yes, then you are. Case closed. Please women, do not look for any man for validation of how wonderful you are. This the very "society" that says that black women are too sexual…which is it? Are we too sexual or it is that no one is "checking" for us? Can't be both. Please do not let anyone shape your identity. I have no issues with a black man dating a white woman or any other woman, but please do not kick us on the way out. Please do not forget where you came from, but to them their mother is probably the exception to their "all black women are _(something stereotypical and stupid no less_________" rule. SMH

    • Reese

      I agree. And they kill me talking about we are hurt. Who is we?

  • DeepThinker

    The article was well stated. I am more irritated by the black women that continue to play into this divide and conquer trap. It makes bw look really desperate, begging for some dumb arse BM to love and accept them. Why not flip the script and only check for those checking for you. Why take it personal what a complete stranger chooses to do?__I believe black women that are struggling with this need to dig deeper and get to the surface of the problem. Maybe these women are seeking validation from these black men due to the lack of validation/relationship they had with their fathers. No matter what you do not everyone is going to like you back and appreciate what you have to offer regardless of skin color. If you know you are womderful eventually someone else will think so too. __As for the black men on this panel, if I were a non-black woman I would run for the hills. They are demeaning these women too by openly stating that they see these women's color as a pre-determinant for who they are without even knowing them. In a way they are being bigots. I know my white female friends would be mad if ANY man would assume they are "easier", submissive and did whatever their man thought they should do.

  • guest

    I refuse to date black men, so no big deal to me…

    …and they weren't all that to begin with…

    • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

      I agree 100% and I just posted something similiar on another thread about "divide and conquer" of the black community.

    • guest

      um, you wrote all that for what?

      i still don't date black men. and i'm not into this fake unity black folks like you like to stir up whenever a black person doesn't with the herd mentality.

      deal with it…

      • John

        You an angry female, I have a hard time believing that a white man puts up with your mouth and anger. You should be cooking and cleaning and STFU and maybe you could get a man worth anything.

        • LilDove

          It’s crap like that in any race that would make a person turn away from someone of their own race. Geesh.

      • LilDove

        @7a7d95af0e43ab828040cb4a31295c2b:disqus  It’s been posted more than once.

  • Rastaman

    If I heard a black man say he does not date black women, my response would be OK!
    End of discussion and no one would even consider having me on a show to refute his declaration. This spectacle is only possible because they found black women who felt a need to confront these idiots.

    I can only conclude that the “single black woman” spectacle persists because black women are easily baited into conflict. These programs and article are all intended to elicit drama and conflict and what has been determined by media outlets this subject attracts many who are willing to engage in drama.

    Want to end these topics, ignore them and see how quickly they disappear.

    • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

      @

      @Rastaman……..exactly and I said the same thing about another article on MN. If you ignore this mess I bet MN will change there tune because some big wig is getting off on this. I am just as guilty for reading this mess which will end.

      r

    • johnnie

      Black women like drama that's why they pick thugs and drug dealers.

  • Mmhmm…..

    @ DarkCarmel

    That's what I say. Good riddens! Bye! I mean, why would I want to date a black man with a f*cked attitude and a negative mentality like that anyway? I mean, they're doing black women a favor. Let the other women deal with that foolishness because I don't need that drama in my life.

    • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

      @Mmhmm…..exactly, why even have that type of toxic man in your life?……like someone said on here if you want to date someone from another race that is cool but do it for the right reasons. Don't degrade your women for all the world to see ranting like a lunatic. I do not see any other men from other races doing this.

      I have dated good and bad BM and there is plenty I could say about the issues with them. But I would never ever degrade or belittle them in front of the world to see. I would also never Iever say I would only date men from another race because BM is this and that. If I met a non-BM and connected it would be for the right reasons not the wrong ones. So I guess after this statement I will now be label another "bitter/angry BW"………….the song has become tired and BORING!……….NEXT!

  • http://twitter.com/DarkCarmel @DarkCarmel

    I say good ridden to damage goods…..they are clearly doing us a favor.

  • Ashley

    What I don't understand is how these Black men can generalize like that. I have dated quite a few bad Black men but I didn't say "I hate all Black men, I'm going for white (or Asian or Latino etc) men" I said "I don't like that type of Black man"

    If you like white women that's cool, my issue is when they don't like Black women… that speaks to a deeper issue.

    • Keep it Real

      They should do a show about white and nonblack men who REFUSE to date black women but date every other race of women. Those black men are not alone. lol

      Secondly BLACK MEN HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF FOR DATING INTERRACIALLY. British Black men and Black men in EVERY industrialized country in the world are dating white and non black women 3x the the rate of Black American men. Non black American men are dating white and interracially at 2x the rate of American black men. I will say it again. There is not as much resentment and hostility from British black women and black women around the world because non black men are open to dating and marrying (30% of British black women marry interracially) those black women. U.S.-born Latino men, we find that intermarriage rates are much higher. Nearly, (46%) of married, U.S.-born Asians, and over half (39%) of U.S.-born Latinos men are inter-racially married, and most often, the intermarriage is with a white partner. Yet, daily blogs and TV shows complaining from their women. This gender conflict in the U.S. from black women and is about American black women dating and marriage options. Let's find out why these men of other races won't date and marry American Black women at the same rate they do other industrialized countries.

      • Keep it Real

        Correction
        Yet, NO daily blogs and TV shows complaining from their women.

    • CRAIG

      I've asked myself the same question whenever I've read about black women promoting the JOYS of dating/marrying white men while bashing black men in the process. This is a war that's going to go on-as if black men and women don't have enough on their plates, already-because it's too much like common sense to just date/marry outside of your race without bashing your own in the process.

    • Mereallietechltd

      they are insecure!

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-Muthapukkin-Tinney/100001244269956 Anthony blak martian Tinney

        And so are you!

  • Kayla

    those men are ugly anyway. i wouldn't date them even if they were into black woman. white woman can have them. and i hate shows that showcase stuff like that. there are plenty of black men out there who can't get enough of black woman. the problem is woman like that are single and waiting at home for their black prince charming, to come sweep them off their feet, when they are busy dating and exploring other options. look nothing wrong with having a strong black man, but i be damned if i didnt take advantage of this fine buffet of different types of men god blessed me with.

    • blocparty86

      Seriously? I don't think it's fair to say that these men are ugly because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. They are both wrong; you don't need to explain your preferences to anyone and the women have no right to get upset about them dating outside their race. There is someone for everyone.

      • Kayla

        i said they were ugly meaning i find them ugly

        • That's Wright

          More ugly inside (as well as outside). The one in the pink shirt seems to have enough attitude for everyone on the panel.

        • Really?!?

          The only reason u find them ugly is because they don't want you!

          • Opinionated4Days

            Nah…..more like their UGLY demeanor and manner in which they elaborate upon their ethnic preferences.

            • KAYMAN

              “REALLY?” Is correct his statement. If they were on there saying how they only date their strong black African queens…etc etc you’d be saying how wonderful these guys are. Keep it real!!! Even if you do find them ugly, you only feel the need to come on here and express that unless you felt some kind of way about their dating preference. It’s typical sour grapes.

    • cleojones

      it is always those types that like to talk about a sista.. the throwaways that no one else wants but a white woman..

      • Smdh

        Soooo you're saying white women don't have standards? That's a pretty ignorant statement

        • Mereallietechltd

          they both share the same insecurities, therefore; they recognize and identify with each other.

          • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anthony-Muthapukkin-Tinney/100001244269956 Anthony blak martian Tinney

            The insecurity of being “OPRESSED”.

    • caine

      You sound just like typical black girl. More concerned with how a guy looks and tramping yourself around trying get all you can get. “fine buffet” right? THIRSTY like the rest of them. Ill stick to latinas.