‘Reed Between The Lines’: Show Weighs in on Natural Hair

October 19th, 2011 - By Brande Victorian

 

 

On last night’s episode of the new BET sitcom “Reed Between the Lines,” Dr. Reed (Tracee Ellis Ross) and her daughter Kaci (Zoe Soul) had an interesting exchange about natural versus relaxed hair. Ross’s character bursts in on Kaci preparing to give herself a “box perm” after her daughter’s love interest tells her that he loves her hair straightened (when she’s wearing a wig for the school play and after her mom pressed out her long curly hair with a hot comb).

Ross’s message to her daughter in the episode is two-fold: one, it’s ridiculous to change your hair for a boy; two, it’s ridiculous to change your hair texture permanently when the hair you have is beautiful the way it is. She tells her:

Once you relax your hair it is never the same. Never. Never. The curl pattern isn’t the same, the texture changes. It will take years for your hair to grow out to the same length. A drastic change like this is something you really need to think about.

Despite how tired I am of the natural versus relaxed hair debate, I think this was an important message for young girls and mothers. While the mother is clearly on team natural and wanted to warn her daughter about the harsh effects a relaxer could have on her hair, she still told her daughter that if she wanted a perm after she thought about it she would take her to a professional to have it done. I like the fact that she didn’t make up her daughter’s mind for her, as many women say their mothers did for them when they permed their hair at very young ages.

I can remember asking my mother for a perm because I was tired of having my hair pressed every week and having my “kitchen” touched up because it never lasted. My mom told me I had to wait until I was 13 to get a relaxer, and I did. Of course, there is also the issue of self-acceptance that you can never beat into young black girls’ heads enough to prepare them for the negative messages they will receive from the media. Tracee Ellis Ross’ character did a great job of building her daughter’s self esteem.

Check out the clip from last night’s episode below.  Was this an important message to put out for black mothers and daughters? What do you think of the series so far?

 

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  • bre

    i am so tired of talking about black hair. if you want a perm PERM IT! If you want to have natural hair don't PERM IT!! having versatile hair is something that makes us unique. we don't have to look like everyone else, nor do we have to keep the same style for weeks or even days.

    we have to find other things to talk about! there's more pressing issues in our communities

  • IllyPhilly

    Was she talking about it would take years for her hair to grow back to that length because she would have to chop it off and start over?? That's the only part I didn't like if so. Black women can grow lengthy hair just as fast as other races. My sister and i have hair to our butt cracks and we're both black as charcoal and don't wear corn rolls or greasy scalps. Hair is not all about the chemicals on the outside. Eat Right!

  • Mila

    My daughter is 5 and I love her natural hair and she does too. She loves her fro, her twist and braids. Yes it is a challenge sometimes but when I look at her with her Big brown beautiful eyes, thick eye brows and full pretty lips it is so her. My mom gave me a jehri curl when I was 5, I got a relaxer at 11 cut my hair off at 18, went back to a relaxer at 21 and then at 24 natural just seemed to be me. I love my locks and my daughter appreciates my beauty. She always asks me mom can I have hair like yours I just tell her you have to wait until your 13. In the meantime keep loving your fro and she does.

  • rainbow

    Black hair in its natural state should be sprayed with some kind of detangler before combing it.

    • Princess Grace

      After years of caring for my daughters hair, I just found this out. I made a mixture from almond oil, aloe vera gel, tea tree oil, conditioner and water in a spray bottle and it worked miracles

      • http://www.facebook.com/erikalilliannaperez Erika Lillianna Perez

        What are the proportions of the items you are using in this mixture? 1/5 of each? Also, what kind of conditioner are you using in your mixture? I really want to try this!

    • Stace

      RIGHT. And combing should truly be kept to a minimun if the coils are very tiny. Combing it too much is the issue. Knots can easily be removed with your fingers. Tight coils end up getting seperated and tangled ans bushy when a comb runs through them. If you let the coils do what they naturally do, and let them clump together, with the assistance of product or plain old WATER, which is free lol, you'll be fine. I finger detangle mine and find that all that combing and detangling was a waste of time!! I have 90% less tangles now than when I was detangling before, during and after styling. And my curls behave much better :-) The information IS OUT THERE. There is no excuse for Black women to keep saying I would love to go natural but it's too nappy/hard to comb/not easy/too hard. Just as we learn over time what clothes look best on our body, how to care for our skin, etc, this is just another part of that…

  • Noiree etBelle

    As a child of about 5 hair was a battle ground for my mother and I: every morning preparing for school took an hour longer because I would be screaming and crying as she combed and styled my natural hair despite having attended to it the night before. In the end she and I were traumatised by my pain and she made a decision to treat it with chemicals. From the age of 5 to 11 I had treated hair. At the age of 12 I grew out my natural hair and kept it. I was older and able to take care of it myself. I have treated it twice since getting into my twenties but I was never pleased with treated hair and I am back to my natural. It's requires more care both before going to bed and in the morning. But it is my crown and I wear it with pride and joy. It has taken me a while to accept this, straight long hair was all I wanted because those are the images I saw. I'm natural now and loving it!!!

  • Noiree etBelle

    As a child of about 5 hair was a battle ground: every morning preparing for school took an hour longer because I would be screaming and crying as she combed and styled my natural hair despite having attended to it the night before. In the end she and I were traumatised by my pain and she made a decision to treat it with chemicals. From the age of 5 to 11 I had treated hair. At the age of 12 I grew out my natural hair and kept it. I was older and able to take care of it myself. I have streated it twice since getting into my twenties but I was never pleased with treated hair and I am back to my natural. It’s requires more care both before going to bed and in the morning. But it is my crown and I wear it with pride and joy. It has taken me a while to accept this, straight long hair was all I wanted because those are the images I saw. I’m natural now and loving it!!!

  • jasmine

    regardless of your hair's texture, you have to be committed to its care if you'd like it to be healthy. since relaxed hair has been the norm for many black women since a fairly young age, many wrongly assume that it's easier to manage. if you've been relaxed for decades, obviously you're going to adopt hair care habits suited to relaxed hair. if you're going from one relaxed to natural, you will need to adjust your routine. it doesn't matter whether you learn to care for your hair from your mother, sister, neighbor or a stranger on youtube, so long as you find something that works.it's sad that so many of us have been brainwashed to think that our natural texture is some unwieldy, exotic beast that needs taming by chemicals.

  • http://fabwtalk.blogspot.com fabwtalk

    Darn it, I must have fell asleep on this part. I actually like the way they approached the topic so good job writers. As for the show, it's slowly growing on me and I'm enjoying it. Just would like to see more from Malcom Jamal Warner as I know he has it in him. Overall, good family show.

  • Princess Grace

    the problem is not acceptance but facilitation. Natural hair is gorgeous but you have to be very commited to the management of it. As a natural I love my hair but have a really hard time finding REAL products to take care of it. The show may have touched on the selfesteem portion because she is willing to change for a boy but in real life everyday so many women end up at home, on the web learning to care for thier natural hair. Mother go to the relaxer for conveinence but the daughters learn a far more harsh lesson by the relaxer

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