The Cuffing Season Commandments

October 21, 2011  |  
1 of 9

It’s mid October and cuffing season is in full swing. If you’ve suddenly found yourself booed up and know not of this cuffing season I speak of let us look to the urban dictionary which defines cuffing season as such :

the season in which everyone is getting coupled up usually around when the weather is beginning to change and it is getting cold outside.

Often women get the short end of cuffing season. Autumn ushers in a new season of boo loving, by Christmas you’re pretty hot and heavy but it’s still new so families and gifts aren’t really a priority and before you know it, it’s spring and you’re left high and dry.

I’ve put together a quick list of rules to help you enjoy cuffing season, if you so choose, without getting burned or scorned in the process by thinking you’ve hit the jackpot with Mr. Cuffington when in reality you’ve just found a place warmer for the colder months.

Cuff – Don’t get cuffed

Would you rather be the hunter or the hunted? The hunter lives another day to tell an exaggerated story while the prey is mounted on a wall for everyone to see. If you’re not doing the cuffing, you’re getting cuffed which means you’re not in control. When you lack control, you lack a stake in the outcome of the situation. You’re feeling him, allowing yourself to get attached, while he’s thinking about a Spring Break from you to travel to the Dominican Republic to get a jump start on the summer.

Two nights max

Limit yourself to two nights a week. I don’t care how hard up you are for some loving, anything over two nights is boo loving status. I know you want late nights and early mornings but not with him. He’s just temporary. No need to act wifed up when you’re both just finding ways to pass the fall/winter months.

Hang with your friends and your friends only

Don’t get caught in the friend trap. It will only end in heartache and screwed up boundaries. Once you start hanging out with your new boo and his friends something in your mind starts seeing this as more than just an extended f**k buddy. Come back to reality, he’s just a f**k buddy and keeping friends separate helps you keep the two worlds that will eventually disconnect completely separate.

No unprotected sex

You’re damn right it feels better but it also comes with a minimum 18yr bid and genes you might not be ready to share. Invest in those sensitive touch condoms or even the ribbed ones, those feel good too. Not to mention all the STD’s floating around. Just keep it safe and strap up. No risky games of Russian roulette during this cuffing season.


But maybe you want more than just some hard d**k and a piece of bubble gum. You’re looking for Mr. Right during this cuffing season. Ok, let’s discuss…

Choose carefully

It takes more than a handsome face and a career path to be “the one” right? Well act like it and don’t just fall for the first brother with light eyes and wavy hair. Take it slow. You need to really try and get to know this man before you make the same mistakes you made last year.

Don’t stall the booty but don’t give it away too fast either

Hey, some people get married after sex on the first date, but most don’t so be strategic. There’s no right timeline to have sex but forcing sex just because is never the move. Make sure you and your fella have good chemistry before you do the do. Don’t have the man wait 6 months just because or you might end up as some challenge he wants to knock off. Also, be careful of knocking boots in the bathroom of the random lounge you met him at (it happens.)

Scout places other than the club

You can do the church scene and find you a BMW (black man worshipping), beware of the gay fellas there though. A great place to meet eligible bachelors who aren’t just trying to “beat” are community centered events. Events at your local library, something held by Big Brothers & Sisters, you get my drift. There are often different types of men who hang around at those types of events that are a little more grounded and interested in finding a good woman.

Cook up something like your grandma

Aside from being your gorgeous, ambitious, loving self, can you please find your cooking self? It’s cold and a brother ain’t trying to be trucking it in the cold all the time to eat out. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. It’s more than just an old adage, this really works.

Did we miss any rules to cuffing season, what would you add to the list?

Email nativenotes at or follow him on Facebook/Twitter/Tumblr and check out some his writings over at Notes of This Native Son

Trending on MadameNoire

View Comments
Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN
  • Pingback: Tis the season for..cuffing? |

  • StopThisFoolishness

    Smh. This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever read. This whole concept is ridiculous. Another creation of human ignorance for another person’s feelings. Why subject yourself to be someone else’s puppet because they get lonely during winter nights??.. Hug your pillow.

  • Pingback: Find ABA Bank Routing Number of any bank or financial institution in the United States using our easy to navigate transit number reference.()

  • Pingback: poemas de amor()

  • Pingback: Isla del carmen()

  • Pingback: como hacer un ensayo()

  • Pingback: que es el amor()

  • Pingback: เกม นกโกรธ()

  • Pingback: permanent magnet generator()

  • Pingback: pret auto()

  • Pingback: Kutjes()

  • Pingback: Best Carbonated Fruit Juice()

  • Pingback: credit scores()

  • Pingback: best home workout()

  • Pingback: lower blood pressure()

  • Srj

    You hit all the nails on the head!

  • Pingback: Dr. Boyce: Did Oprah Help Fuel the HIV Epidemic in Black America? « The Industry Cosign()

  • Chad

    Interesting article! The topic was on point for the season and the writer as much as I hate to admit it, was spot on in there assessment of men during this season! All you warm climate people know about this time of year even though you don’t admit it in your responses;)

  • Aquinettanunley

    People gone do what they wanna do . Obviously with or with out this or any other article . People jus need to do the rite thing and trust in god finding them a mate or someone they are meant to spend the rest of there life with . This is mostly somethin young people do .

  • Adam

    never heard of cuffing season, but thanks to the author(s) for the pic/shout from the Malcolm and Martin community course i led in Syracuse!

  • Shaquetha Imesheion

    Now I see EXACTLY why there’s this sudden influx of man haters & chicks “going gay”… I really do.

  • justbu

    I was just wondering if MN could do something about the pop up ads. I really enjoy this site and I know y’all have to pay bills but they are getting kinda annoying every time I click on something.

  • ray allen

    And don't use the "too nice to date guy friend" that you have no intention of really dating until you find the bad boy that you're looking for and throw the "nice guy" friend away.

    It's why so many former nice guys have razor wire and minefields around their hearts.

  • Really?!?

    It's just sad that there are women walking around with low enough self esteem to settle for a damn seasonal relationship. What is the world coming to?

  • Lawd.take the wheel

    YEP, its' that time of year again!! There will be more CREEPing than Halloween!! The only think I'm "cuffin" is nice big booty and a nice set of breasts!! I've the "ole lady" thing 4 the! Time to fall back on sum….ehem!! Well. u get the picture!



    • millz


  • College kidd

    I’m in college and it gets pretty cold during this time of the year so I would say it’s ok for college students to partake in cuffing season. We’re in school to earn the career of our dreams so why not have a little fun in the mean time?

    • LaLaLaMeansILoveYou

      yes and why not have a little HIV/clap/pregnancy/abortion/emotional issues after you realize he's not serious about you leading to lifelong issues with men to go along with your little fun?

      Excuse me for thinking college students were supposed to be smarter than that. At least I was when I was in college.

      Didn't mean to go off but let me just say this…contrary to popular belief, it's not going to catch on fire if you wait to use it with someone who deserves it. The best things in life, like a lasting, meaningful relationship, are worth waiting for.

  • LaLaLaMeansILoveYou

    Who is the writer of this idiotic article? "nativenotes"…yes, I suggest that you stay anonymous if you're going to continue writing bullsh*t like this.

    Wolves in sheep's clothing…

  • LaLaLaMeansILoveYou

    thanks I thought I was the only one who found the whole premise of this article to be idiotic.

    Way to promote promiscuity without expectancy of anything more among black women, MN. Geared towards black people my *ss. Between these and all the "is our natural hair pretty enough?" articles with the underlying sense of self-hate I wouldn't be surprised if this site wasn't owned and operated by an old fat Jewish man.

  • jasmin

    Never heard of cuffing season. Maybe because I’m from south florida and it never really cold, so we don’t have a need to be cuddled up. Lol

  • jasmin

    Never heard of cuffing season. Maybe because I’m from south florida and it rarely cold, so we don’t have a need to be cuddled up.

    • Chocolate Bunny

      Riiight, I'm from Tampa, FL and I've never heard of a damn cuffing season!

  • Guest

    Please be smart when you cuff…once spring roll around, you could be cuffed for life…

    • guest

      …spring roll…lol….

  • Stanley

    I like this season. That's when there's a lot of coupons for relationship (sex). Every girl gives special. Some as high as 90% off of the summer price.

    • L-Boogie


  • Nina Nehemiah

    The season, come on you know better & you’re smarter! SMH!

  • M3G


  • M3G

    Searching for a “cutty buddy” is like a job hunt.. Check out my post, “NOW HIRING”, to see the requirements and responsibilities at (search Megan, Detroit).

    • L-Boogie

      You are funny.

  • L-Boogie

    LOL! Cuffing season — also known as extended Booty call season.