Signs You’re Too Nice And It’s Ruining Your Life
Signs You Are Too Nice
Some people believe there is no such thing as being too nice. Those people are too nice. If being nice to somebody else requires you to be mean and disrespectful to yourself, then if you think about it, you’re not being nice—you’re just the one getting the bad end of the deal. And, unfortunately, when you’re too nice, you attract people who are looking for people they can step all over. This ranges the entire spectrum of relationships from boyfriends to friends to colleagues. If you’re too nice, you may even become a punching bag for some of your friends or partners when they’re under stress because they know you won’t put them in their place. Have a little faith in yourself; if you feel the urge to be a little nasty to somebody, they probably deserve it. After all, you’re usually so nice.
Here are signs you’re too nice and it’s ruining your life.
You go out with somebody who has canceled three times
If a guy has failed to make it to the first three dates, then clearly he is either not that interested in you, not that interested in dating in general, or remarkably self-involved or flaky. In other words, that’s not someone you should want to date anyway. And you can go ahead and tell him as much when he tries to plan date number four.
You are unbelievably busy
You cannot believe how your calendar becomes filled up five months in advance. It happens because you never say not to any invitation, including invitations to help people move or paint their apartment. You can look at your calendar next time and say, “I don’t have any time set aside for myself that month so, I gotta say no to this one.”
You attract needy people
You attract people who always need to vent, always need advice, and whose lives are always in a state of disarray. This is because nobody else will tolerate the fact that these people do not change and do not learn from their mistakes—nobody but you. Instead of telling them the world is wrong and they are right, try telling them what you actually think they should do. They’ll probably go away because these kinds of people don’t want to hear the truth.
It drives you nuts if someone is mad at you
If you even presume somebody might be the tiniest bit mad at you, it keeps you up at night. In fact, you’ll harass that person until they talk things out with you. Guess what? Some people are dumb, selfish, have no perspective and will get mad at you no matter how nice you are. F*ck ‘em.
A lot of people owe you money
This is a classic sign of a person who is too nice. The fact that people haven’t paid you back your debt is a sign that people know you’re the type of person who won’t push the issue, so it’s mostly people who can’t pay you back money who ask you for money.
You give a lot of rides
You find yourself driving people to the airport or home after a night at the bars a lot. You’re pretty sure you drive more than most Uber drivers do—but for free.
Your boyfriend hasn’t planned a date night in months
Because you keep saying, “It’s okay. I totally understand spending time playing video games is more important. And I totally get that you need to save the date night money for getting drinks with your friends—it’s your money.” NO! STOP! If you’re a priority, he’ll spend the money on date night and not his boys.
People call you crying a lot
Sometimes you wonder if your number is listed as a grief assistance hotline because half the time you pick up, somebody is crying. That’s because people know you’ll drop whatever you’re doing to be there for them if they’re crying, and some people take advantage of that fact.
You’ve dropped a date off…on another date
One first date asked you to drop him off on another date. You told yourself it was fine because, hey it’s not like you’re monogamous or he owes you anything. He does owe you something though; a little human decency.
People are shocked by your kind gestures
People are often genuinely shocked by your kind gestures. That’s because you’re probably too kind and too generous, to the point where people aren’t sure they should accept your gesture.
You pet sit a lot
You sure do spend a lot of time pet sitting, and particularly for friends who have pets that are very demanding. Like geriatric cats that need medication every fifteen minutes and incontinent dogs who need their diapers changed.
You do all the dishes at a party that isn’t yours
When you’re at a party, the other guests know they’re off the hook for helping clean up because you will actually stay there, awake after the host has gone to bed, doing the dishes.
You are behind on your own errands
Your own life and personal tasks are in disarray because you let everyone else’s needs come first. You can’t remember the last time you just got a hair cut or bought enough groceries for three days.
You have unexplained stomach aches
That would be the giant knot that has formed in your stomach from every time you swallowed your tongue.
You become b*tchy when you’re drunk
Your true thoughts have to come out somewhere! And they tend to find their way out of you when five shots of tequila are in you.