Women Lie: 9 Little Whities We Tell All of the Time

October 10, 2011  |  
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Have you ever noticed how easy it is to lie to men?

If there is one thing women are just as guilty as men are in relationships, it’s lying. Even though most of them come in the form of little white turn-a-mole hill-into-a-mountain fibs, some are quite deceitful. But, then again, how would we retain our “mystery” if we didn’t? After all, part of the chase is trying to figure us out, right?

Here are a few lies women are notorious for telling:

“I’m fine.”
No, you’re not. In fact, you’re angry—steaming, percolating. Chances are you’ve actually been brewing for a while and being honest means blowing up. Or you’re craving sympathy and using it as a tool to string him along.

“I have a headache.”
Isn’t it funny how migraines sense a bad date coming? Physical ailments are great for getting out of dates. Unfortunately, it’s not a clear indicator that you’re completely uninterested so he will likely contact you again.

“I’ve never done this before.”
We know men like to be the first to dirty a woman up, so we tell them what they want to hear, make them feel how they want to feel. All the while, our experience is quite the opposite.

“I’ve only slept with, like, [X] guys.”
We know that any number over 10 requires damage control. So, most women play it safe and round down. If ever, we may tell him the truth later.

“I’m not really a drinker.”
No one wants to seem like a lush. It’s not cute, especially to men. What guy wants a woman who can drink him under the table? Exactly, so we profess otherwise.

“I weigh [X] pounds.”
I don’t know why we lie about this. Stevie Wonder can see you don’t weigh 130 pounds when you’re 5’2 wearing a size 12.

“I’ll be ready in, like, ten minutes.”
Translation: Take a seat on the couch and turn on the game. You’ll be waiting a while.

“It was on sale.”
Turns out the Miu Miu boots were actually next to the sale items. Whoops!

“I don’t know.”
You know. The truth is you’re not in the mood for any sort of conflict. After a rough day, it’s easier to settle for Chipotle than bicker for sushi.

LaShaun Williams is a Madame Noire contributor and columnist whose work has appeared in the New York Times and across several popular sites, such as HuffPost Black Voices and the Grio. Visit her blog Politically Unapologetic for more on relationships and culture, or follow her on Twitter @itsmelashaun and Facebook.

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