Qualities Women Over-Prioritize In Boyfriends

December 28, 2016  |  
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Many personality traits look good on paper (or in soap opera characters), but in real life, they can be a little too much to deal with every single day for the rest of your life. On top of that, a lot of women prioritize character traits simply because they believe that’s what the rest of the world looks for, or it’s what they are supposed to want. Ultimately, all that should matter is what you want.

Then there is the added element of looking for traits that pertain to how a man interacts in every realm of his life, even when he isn’t with you. There is something to be said for a man who is well-liked and respected, but at the end of the day, if you know he is worthy of love and respect, shouldn’t that be all that matters? Here are character traits women way over-prioritize when looking for a boyfriend.

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Shutterstock

Charisma/Leadership personality

You know who else has charisma? Charles Manson, cult leader, politicians, philanderers…I’m not saying all charismatic men are selfish and manipulative, but I am saying that those traits only help a man out in the workforce—they have nothing to do with his ability to be loyal, loving and kind to you.

 

 

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Shutterstock

Well-traveled

Don’t be quick to assume that a man who isn’t well-traveled isn’t cultured. Some people didn’t grow up with the means to travel the world, but they may have still taken every opportunity to study other cultures, attend every international museum, show and book reading, and even taken some foreign language courses.

 

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

Social butterfly

After you’ve been together for a while, you’ll stop going everywhere together, and you will crave slightly separate social lives. Then, it really won’t matter if your partner wants to stay home on some nights.

 

 

 

 

 

istock

istock

Other women want him

This is a rather immature requirement—that other women want your guy. If you are a secure and confident person, you shouldn’t need other women to validate your choice in a man.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Shutterstock

Building an empire

Men who build empires are impressive, to be certain. They are also always on the clock, never home for dinner, and probably won’t get to know their children very well. Those are just some things to think about. Ambition comes in all forms, and building an empire may be a form that isn’t suitable for a romantic partner.

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

Height

Really? You would write off a guy with whom you were compatible on every other level all because you don’t feel comfortable in heels around him? Look around; plenty of couples consist of shorter men and taller women and nobody cares.

 

 

 

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Shutterstock

A great relationship with his family

Real quick: how is your relationship with your family? Oh, you’re still mad at your parents about their divorce, and you and your mom yell on the phone once a week? Okay. Cool. No other points to make here.

 

 

 

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Age

If age will interfere with his desire to have children or do other things that are important to you like traveling the world, then that may be a problem. But if the relationship is running smoothly otherwise, who cares if he doesn’t know about the youngest Kardashian. It’s probably better that way.

 

 

 

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Shutterstock

Wealth, today

Don’t look for the man who has money today; look for the man who has life skills that will always allow him to build wealth. That man can deal with the highs and lows and unpredictability of life.

 

 

 

 

 

"sex pf"

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Great sex

Newsflash: there will come a time when you have sex once a week if even that. At that point, what will really matter is if this person can be your best friend, your partner in crime, and teammate for life. Plus, you can just coach him in the sex department.

 

 

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

Sobriety, or lack thereof

Some women write off a man the moment they see he is sober—believing it will be no fun to go out with him, or that he will judge them. First of all, he won’t’ judge you. Second of all, it’s amazing that he realized he had a problem and tackled it. And third of all, you won’t want to go out drinking for the rest of your life. You probably only have a few years left of that in you.

 

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Shutterstock

Common interests

It really shouldn’t matter if you’ve never even heard of his hobbies nor him yours. What should matter is that he is willing to learn about them and accompany you to them. There are millions of men who are also into Spinlates, but that doesn’t mean you should date them.

 

 

 

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Shutterstock

Having your friends adore him

You’ll learn this eventually; if your friends simply don’t have a problem with him, you’ve hit the jackpot. A lot of women criticize and dislike their friends’ partners. Finding a man over whom your friends will fawn is rare. Settle for a man who your friends get along with just fine.

 

 

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Shutterstock

Never been divorced

Hey, life is complicated. Give him props for recognizing he married the wrong person and going through the painful, complicated process of a divorce, all so that he could live his truth. That’s kind of amazing.

 

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

Good at texting/calling

So long as he explains to you that he isn’t great at texting and calling, but he still makes consistent plans to see you and lives up to his obligations, get over the other stuff. One day, you probably will only call each other once a day to check in, before meeting each other at your shared home.

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

Good dresser

Honestly, men who are really good dressers…there’s just something off about them. They are either too full of themselves or so insecure that they cover it up with nice clothes. Let the guy you date be comfortable in who he is—let him wear the quirky t-shirts.

 

 

 

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Shutterstock

Healthy lifestyle

So long as your partner maintains a weight his doctor is happy with and sees the value in some vegetables and gym time, be grateful! You shouldn’t write off a wonderful man because he doesn’t have a personal trainer or protein powder.

 

 

 

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Shutterstock

His promiscuous past, or lack thereof

So he slept around back in the day. It happens. Maybe you did, too. All that should matter is that he takes no joy in that any more, and really values a committed relationship.

 

 

 

 

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Image Source: Shutterstock

His relationship past

He has only had one or two serious relationships in the past. This freaks you out—does he have commitment issues? If he seems perfectly loyal and trustworthy, then maybe he just didn’t want to settle, and he is happy enough to be on his own until he finds the one.

 

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

He’s a planner

Does he show up to plans? Does he respond to your texts and emails about plans? Does he make an effort and seem engaged when he comes to the plans you make? Great. So you have to control the calendar a little—so what? That also means you get to choose what you do.

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