Why I Got My Tubes Tied
At the age of 26, I made the decision to have a tubal ligation, or what is commonly referred to as a woman having a her tubes tied. A lot of people who became aware of my decision wondered why I’d take such drastic steps when there were so many non-permanent contraception methods available on the market. My most recent birth control method had failed me and I wanted to have something more permanent done to avoid any future issues.
Most medical professionals are unwilling to sterilize a woman prior to her thirtieth birthday unless she has more than one child. I considered myself a viable candidate for the tubal ligation procedure because I had just given birth to my youngest daughter the year before and she was born prematurely. She is the blessing that came from my contraception glitch. Due to her prematurity and my struggle with pre-eclampsia, a genetic counselor strictly advised me against getting pregnant again without consulting a physician first. I honestly had no interest in having more children, so the consultation wasn’t be necessary. The only consultation I was interested in was on how to take a permanent step to avoid any future unplanned pregnancies. If I wanted my girls and I to have a shot at having an economically sound future, I’d have to make a commitment to not bear any more children out of wedlock.
At the time, I was in a relationship, but wedding bells were not ringing ; in this modern age men don’t marry a woman simply because she’s pregnant. That notion is from a bygone era. It seems we’ve become content with being “baby mamas” and “baby daddies” and we accept it as the new normal. This was a new normal that just doesn’t sit well with me. There was nothing I could do about the past, but I knew I had to do something to secure our future. While I had little power to control over whether or not I would get married, I did have more than enough power to choose not to continue the dysfunctional cycle of having unplanned pregnancies.
A mentor once told me, “the rich get rich and the poor have babies.” It took me years to understand what she meant. There I was, 25-years-old, with two kids born out of wedlock and her message was finally clear. We do ourselves a great disservice when we bring children into uncertain circumstances and create more mouths to feed than we have the ability to earn income to support. I decided I’d had enough and boldly declared no more kids.
Shortly after making my decision, I arranged an appointment to have a tubal ligation procedure done. My gynecologist was initially hesitant to grant me the procedure. He tried to dissuade me, saying I may want to have more children in the future and would not be able to. I assured him I loved the children I had, but did not want anymore. If for some reason I did have regrets about my choice in the future, it was something I was willing to live with.
I had the procedure done and with it came a sense of peace. I could finally focus on building the life I wanted for myself and my girls without the fear of an unplanned pregnancy looming over me. I eventually did get married to my youngest daughter’s father and we are both happy the choice I made.
Have you had your tubes tied? Why’d you decide to do it?