#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou: Explores The Truths About Emotional Abuse
When we think about abuse in relationships, our minds immediately consider physical violence. Frankly, it’s the easiest to detect. It seems to be the most damaging. Everyone can relate to an attack against our bodies. And, as we all know, it’s a very real issue, across the world. But there are more ways to disempower someone. And aside from the scars physical abuse may leave on someone, the affects of emotional abuse are often very similar. The women and men in these relationships are left feeling powerless, insecure and unworthy.
Dominican-American writer Zahira Kelly addressed the issue of emotional abuse with the hashtag #MaybeHeDoesntHitYou.
In an interview with BBC Trending, she explained the necessity of her message.
“Abuse is often seen as very cut and dry, and only physical. For several years now on social media, on a daily basis I talk about many different forms of abuse and what they look like.”
She said it’s important that people be able to “suss out damaging situations.”
And the BBC article went on to list the ways in which a partner can be emotionally abuse, including putting on a respectable front for other people, mocking you, refusing to see your point of view, using information and things you’ve told him or her in confidence to shame you, and trying to make you jealous.
Several of these behaviors were exemplified in the tweets the hashtag inspired. Check them out below.
#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou but he tells you he'll kill himself if you break up with him.
— Jenny Jaffe (@jennyjaffe) May 11, 2016
#maybehedoesnthityou but he tries to control who you talk to, where you go, what friends you can have, and acts like it's out of love.
— sailor mourn ⚰ (@detricotage) May 9, 2016
#maybehedoesnthityou but he says you should be grateful he doesn't
— audrey phantomhive (@audstronaut) May 9, 2016
#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou but he never lets you forget that he could leave you for someone prettier, less "slutty," less emotional, less damaged.
— Ella D'awwwson (@brosandprose) May 9, 2016
— AzureKingfisher (@Alcedo_Azurea) May 2, 2016
#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou but he threatens your financial security, undermines your authority & constantly tells you you are nothing without him.
— Nengi Willie-Pepple (@RunwayRibbons) May 2, 2016
#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou but his voice is always the only one to be heard and he makes the value of your opinions and feelings seem like nothing
— SM (@floreashelby) May 2, 2016
#maybeHeDoesntHitYou but threw a huuuge raging weeks long miserable fit coz u cut your hair 'without his permission'.
— alienated antillana (@bad_dominicana) May 2, 2016
#maybehedoesnthityou but he pressures and coerces you into sex; tells you that he prefers fucking you when you're drunk+ he's sober
— 👻Jasmine's Ghost👻 (@JasMoneyRecords) May 2, 2016
#maybehedoesnthityou but he tells you to go kill yourself when he knows you're often suicidal
— akwaeke emezi (@azemezi) May 2, 2016
#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou but he threatens your friends, family, or pets. Threatens to reveal person information about you to your peers
— Lawrence Of A Labia (@afrotastic_lex) May 2, 2016