Would You Hire Someone To Write Your Vows?
Vow writing is one of those anxiety-inducing tasks that brides and grooms have the option of removing from their wedding to-do lists altogether, if they please. It’s not unheard of to opt not to share personal vows and most guests won’t even think twice about the fact that you recited traditional vows. Still, many of us choose to challenge ourselves and our partners by deciding to speak from the heart. Of course, anyone who has ever attempted to write anything knows that getting your thoughts down on paper isn’t always as easy as it sounds. But just as with anything else, there are professionals available to make the vow writing process a lot easier. Alicia Ostarello and Angie Sommer, the women behind Vow Muse, offer professional writing services for wedding vows, best man and maid of honor speeches, and any other oral, wedding-related presentation that you can think of. Recently, I was able to catch up with the writing duo to find out a little bit more about professional vow writing and how it all works.
What are some of the reasons someone might want to have their vows professionally written?
There are a lot of reasons! Some clients reach out to us because they just don’t have time to write their own vows — it’s a daunting task. But many clients seek us out because they know how they feel, but they aren’t sure how to put those thoughts into words. When it comes to writing about complex and deep emotions, even good writers struggle. There’s so much to the feelings that surround love! Alicia often jokes that when she gets married, she’s going to ask Angie to help her write her vows. And other clients really don’t know what they want to say, so we work with them to help them discover the right words.
What is done to ensure that vows have a personal touch even though they’re being written by someone other than the bride or groom?
A lot of our job is listening. Every time we write vows, we start by talking to the client. We ask them a lot of questions about themselves, their partner, and their relationship. We want to know our clients as people, and understand the nuances of their courtship and commitment. When we know all this, we can create vows that are personal and touch on inside jokes and memories the two share. We also include revisions in our process and encourage honest feedback, so we work with our clients to make each set of vows word perfect for them.
What would you say to someone who feels that reading vows written by someone else is impersonal?
It’s totally understandable to feel this way. But if we’ve done our job right, you won’t feel like you’re reading vows someone else wrote. You’ll feel like you’re reading your vows. No good writer works alone (even we work as a team on every project). Heck, even the President has speech writers who take his ideas and get them to sound great. The best writing – and thus the best vows – comes from collaborating and editing, and our process is in place to ensure that we are able to write vows that are true to you. All that said, you should always do what feels the most comfortable and right for you.
Would you consider hiring professional writers to pen your wedding vows? Why or why not?