Most of us know Somaya Reece from her time on Love and Hip Hop New York. She was, of course, one of the OGs of the franchise, starring on Season 1 and Season 2 before leaving the program. You know, before things got a little too theatrical…
A lot has changed for Reece since then. She’s dropped down from a size 18 to a size 6, she’s dealt with a lot of personal issues and let go of pain from the past, and she’s even found love–with a woman.
A majority of these significant changes took place after joining the new E! reality show Famously Single. And while it sounds like a cheesy dating show from the title alone, it’s actually quite deep. Stars who have been on reality TV programs and struggled with their relationships get therapy from Dr. Darcy Sterling to help them get to the root of what has been holding them back from finding love. And during filming, Reece was able to unpack a lot of baggage. During the NBC summer series preview, we talked to Reece about where she stands with her sexuality, why she’s doing reality TV once again, what spurred her to lose the weight and keep it off, and how she made her haters her elevator.
MadameNoire: What persuaded you to take part in Famously Single?
Somaya Reece: Before I did this show, I was going through an entire period of soul-searching. So I was single. And I realized I got caught in a whirlwind of work. There was no balance. There was no dating. I was like, “I’m single, and I’m not dating.” And then I realized I was blocking myself, and I knew why. I didn’t really identify with it all the way, but I have dated women before. I just haven’t been public with it. I was on television, and everyone was making a mockery of same-sex relationships. People go on TV and will act like they’re gay for pay. So I really wanted to make sure that when I was ready to speak about that, people knew how genuine that is to me. And if you dig back to a bunch of my mixtapes, I’ve been talking about it for years. It’s nothing new. But women, I feel, need to be protected, so I’ve always protected my relationships with women. And when the show opportunity came about, I was kind of going through a couple of things that you will see. And I was considering therapy. But you know, in our Black and Latino community, mental health is always overlooked because people call you crazy for wanting to see a therapist. I don’t know why that is for us, but that’s what it is. You’re shamed for it.
MN: So it was emotional turmoil and wanting to open up about your own sexual identity that prompted you?
Reece: It was really two things for me. I thought maybe I can use this as an opportunity to talk about a couple of things that I never talked about. At the same time, I could get therapy. So why not? I also thought this could be groundbreaking for the community. To see that it’s okay to get therapy. You’re not crazy or needy for wanting it. And you don’t have to be in such a deep, dark place to want it. And then as it was going along, I realized there were a lot of other things I hadn’t dealt with and I was putting things in a bottle. I’m talking 12 years of pain.
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MN: So what was it exactly that made you want to be open about your feelings for women?
Reece: The sexuality thing came about because I was actually about to be outed by an ex-girlfriend who’s mad. So I was like, “Let me beat this chick before it comes to anything.” I’m not ashamed of it, and I don’t have to label myself. But what I definitely didn’t want was for someone else to tell my story. You know? I have known since I was seven or eight years old. I had a very good idea that I liked women. But I didn’t know that I liked women then. I just knew that I felt funny and happy around them. And you’re 8; you don’t know that that means that you like them because you’re not even sexual yet. But I just knew there was this happiness I would get with women, versus men. And when I really identified with that, that’s when I understood what that meant. And I’ve had relationships you guys didn’t know about it. And some with other public figures you guys didn’t know about it. There’s been a lot of relationships that I kept very quiet. And there’s only a few that came out because of one reason or another. But my current girlfriend just totally changed my perspective. She’s very private, and no one suspected or knew. So I wanted to be respectful towards her feelings too. But we didn’t get in a relationship until after the show. So I’m really happy. She makes me feel like I’m on top of the world. And I’m just going to live in my truth. Why do I have to hide? I’ve been living this for a long time.
For me, I’ve always just been like, “Just don’t label me.” I believe love is love. So if I fell in love with a man or I fell in love with a woman, I’m not confused. I know love is love. But what I have identified is that I’m definitely much more connected to women.
MN: So if you were single and a man approached you, would you entertain him or are you solely into women?
Reece: I mean, I can acknowledge God’s creation [laughs]. I can acknowledge it and appreciate it, but I’m truly not interested. But then again, my current relationship is the first one that has really made me feel like, “I don’t care if anyone knows. I don’t care.” I love her so much, and I can’t wait for you guys to hear and see everything. I’m totally in love with my girlfriend; I totally see myself marrying her and maybe having children, which I’m scared about, you’ll see why on the show, but we’re really heavily considering a lot of heavy commitment things.
MN: Another thing I wanted to speak to you about was your weight loss. You look amazing! What spurred that change and how did you do it?
Reece: We as women often go through yoyoing. On the show, I discuss how my eating disorders started. I had many. All of them. Across the board. So I had gone through years–if you Google Somaya Reece photos for the last 10 years, skinny one year, big another year. Skinny one year, bigger another year. Skinny, skinny, skinny–bigger. But then I had a heart scare. That’s what really took it over the top for me. And then I was on Love and Hip Hop Season 2, and I was overweight. People were making fun of me: “Oh she got fat, she lost it.” You know how people talk. But what it came down to was that I decided I needed to learn how to lose weight in a healthy way instead of going through the diet, and the binging, and the purging. And again, in our community, we don’t talk about these things. It’s always this taboo thing. So I decided that I was going to start blogging about it. And I did, and it gained an audience. And I was happy that I could help other people because I want to leave a message. My message is that you can overcome obstacles, you just have to try. And that developed into me creating the Get Slim detox tea. I am the owner and creator. That’s mine. And I now own seven natural weight-loss products under my company, ThisFitsMe. And it all stems from a temporary downfall. Now I’ve helped people lose thousands of pounds. I’ve helped my girlfriend lose weight. I mean, this is what I want to do for people. So it really stemmed from hate. People were hating on me so much; I had my heart scare, and it was just a lot going on. So it saved my life because I’m not supposed to be here. I’m very grateful and glad. But now it’s a whole new issue, trying to keep it off. And I’m in love, girl, so you know I done gained 5 pounds [laughs]. But I’m fine with it.
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Check out Famously Single when it premieres this summer. It debuts on June 14 at 10 p.m. on E!
