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Somebody call the Maytag man because never in a million years would I have expected all of this to come out in the rinse.

I’m talking about Quentin “Funky Dineva” Latham and Michelle “ATLien” Brown. You know, the dynamic blogging duo mostly known for their exposés on Chateau Sheree?

Yeah, them. Well, they’re not friends no mo’

It all started when Brown, who runs the site Straight From The A, took to Periscope and basically had a meltdown over allegations that her former BFF trashed the townhome she was renting to him.

As Brown tells it (and a blog posted the following day after the Periscope meltdown), she wasn’t trying to air him out but “my emotions got the best of me and the video (which should have disappeared after 24 hours) was placed on YouTube and my emotional moment has now become fodder.”

She also adds, “Hell, I may as well join in on the tea party…”

Well, that’s the spirit. And here’s the video below:

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I’ll try to summarize it for those folks on a Cricket wireless plan. Basically, the 13-minute long video features Brown and her friend Joy going from room to room in the townhome, surveying the damage they claim Latham did to the residence during his two-year lease. From the video, some of the alleged damage includes warped floor boards, bleached carpets and piles of dog mess everywhere. Also, Brown points out that her washing machine and dryer are missing.

After filming more of the damages, Brown turns the cameras on herself and gets emotional as she tells her Periscope audience, “I let a friend move in – I’m about to cry – I let a friend move in, no security deposit. You know what that friend did to me? That friend did not pay rent for three months. I had to put my friend out. So now my friend is mad at me because I had to put him out.”

On her blog she also alleges drug abuse might have played a part in Latham’s alleged troubles and adds:

I never intended to go through with an eviction and was hoping that he would ‘do the right thing’ all the way up to the day the Marshal’s came to put his belongings on the curb. I even called and told him they were coming.

In the end, throughout years of helping someone earn a living and providing them with tools that COULD have made their bank accounts flourish, I got in return a townhouse that looks like a crackhouse and stolen appliances.

After all these years of blogging, my ‘friend’ still walks out the house looking homeless, doesn’t have a car, and on top of that… didn’t pay rent for months.

So, NO… this is NOT a blog beef. This is a FRIEND hoping and praying that their FRIEND gets help for whatever ISSUES he is going through.

Unsurprisingly, Latham would respond with a scathing blog post – and alleged receipts – of his own, claiming Brown is lying and falsely accusing him of theft. The post is rather long, so I’ll try to summarize it the best I can. Latham acknowledges that he had fallen behind on rent but attributes it to depression and financial problems caused by the recent passing of his mother. He also said that because freelance checks don’t always come in on time, that was another reason he was frequently late on rent. However, he thought Brown understood as much, considering she has never made mention of it being a problem before.

And Latham denied destroying the property and said that Brown was a daily visitor to the house while he lived there. Therefore, if there was any damage, she would have certainly said something before. Likewise, Latham also denied owning her any money other than a couple hundred dollars he claimed he didn’t pay once she started the eviction process against him.

And the washer and dryer? Well, Latham said that he didn’t have them, nor did he want them. As proof, he posted a picture of his new front-load washing machine and dryer.

As to why this massive airing of grievances is happening now between two gossip bloggers who were once thick as thieves? Latham writes, “When it boils down to it, Michelle is mad that I don’t want to be her friend, has moved the hell on, and she can’t take it. It’s eating her up so bad that a bitch is over here lounging, drinking, and eating good, that she had to start more unnecessary drama. But per her email, its no drama only business.

We all know I am far more entertaining on camera than Michelle will ever be. I can easily do a video and read Michelle and reveal embarrassing things about her, but for what? For why?”

Nevertheless, Latham did a video (with the wig off):

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Messy, right?

I’m not going to lie: I adore Funky Dineva’s no-nonsense approach to tongue-wagging (the recent Jada Pinkett Smith read still has me in tears). And I used to live for Straight From The A recaps.

But with that being said, it’s quite ironic that two bloggers who basically made pretty decent careers for themselves airing out everyone else’s dirty laundry are not only airing out each other’s (and their own) dirty laundry, but also arguing over a damn washing machine and dryer.

If that is not a sitcom episode waiting to happen, I don’t know what is.

Still, I wish them the best. Based on everything I read, both Latham and Brown’s relationship could have benefitted from more honesty. For instance, Latham should have been more open about his feelings, in particular, why he felt the need to become distant from her. And Brown should have spoken up sooner about how she felt about him always paying the rent late.

But if I’ve learned anything from this hot mess tea, it’s that you should always get a deposit and a receipt – even from friends.

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