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Bow Wow and I don’t agree on a whole lot. But the rapper, host and sometime-actor made a good point in his attempt to shut down rumors that he is romantically involved with singer Keyshia Cole.
I have to admit there’s some truth to that. We can argue that Bow Wow wasn’t exactly on his A game when he was with Erica Mena. We all remember how he chose to promote himself through his relationship and then, when the relationship went sour, chose to publicly tear her down. We can certainly argue that he wasn’t concerned about protecting his brand or appearing to be a good human being when he was publicly talking about his fiancee’s miscarriage.
But aside from public, C-list celebrity relationships, the idea of a romantic partner taking you off your grind, happens in the real world everyday. There are people, men and women, whose relationships become so important they forget to devote themselves to their personal goals, friends, families and of course career.
Most of the time it’s not even a conscious decision. While I’ve always regarded myself as someone who’s goal driven, my last relationship proved that my resolve could be tested. At the time I was supposed to be working on writing my book, my grandmother’s memoir. This was in addition to my day job. After my 9-5, the hours I should have spent writing, I would spend on the phone talking to him, sometimes about the very dreams neither one of us were actively working towards.
And the crazy thing is, I never really felt anxious, guilty or unproductive. I didn’t realize that I was choosing to invest in the relationship at the expense of myself. It wasn’t until it was over that I noticed 180 degree turn in productivity. So much so that I astounded myself and confirmed that the relationship really had run its course.
Still, being with someone now is even more ambitious than me, who always makes time to practice and perfect his craft, it motivates and inspires me to be and do better.
Really, when it comes down to it, you can’t blame the relationship for a personal choice to put one aspect of your life over the other. When you’re mature enough to fight for what you really want, you’ll be able to put things in the proper order at the proper time.
