Do You Research Your Man’s Exes?
My last relationship was so hard to let go because we were always off and on. And even when we were off, we somehow ended up being friends…which would eventually turn in to us being on again. It was a cyclical mess. But either way, when I was playing the friend role, before I came to the realization that our communication was rather inappropriate, I heard plenty of stories about his current girlfriend.
Mostly bad stories about how he wanted to be out but could never find the strength to do it. Read: Homegirl put it on him and he couldn’t make it out. Anyway, with all this knowledge about her, I had to see what she looked like. Had to. Who was this sex goddess? These days, all it takes is a name and a mutual friend on any social media channel, this one just so happened to be Facebook, and you can learn someone’s whole life story. More than what I already knew about her. So of course when I found her profile, there were questions I hope the pictures would answer. I wanted to see if he had a type. He didn’t. All of his girlfriends looked drastically different. I wanted to see if she was cute. She was aight. And I wanted to see if there was any signs of crazy. She looked pleasant enough.
A part of me felt a tad bad about stalking. But hmmm not that bad.
Plus, I know I’m not the only one. There’s even a meme for it.
So many of my friends and associates have talked about wanting to see what the ex looks like, wanting to know what type of person she is. Clicking through her Facebook or scrolling through her Instagram, analyzing her fashion choices, trying to figure out what it was he once saw in her. As long as you don’t slip up and accidentally like an Instagram picture, I really see no down side in all of this, just a collection of information.
I guess things can get a little sticky if you’re feeling a little insecure and his ex happens to be a banger. But at the end of the day, you can always tell yourself that he chose you. There was something that didn’t make them a good fit for one another. Then all of those worries have to flee.
Have you ever done research on your man’s ex? Is there anything wrong with traveling down this rabbit hole?