Shutterstock
First and foremost, let me say that snooping is not something I’m proud of. But now and then, I get nosy. I don’t think my boyfriend is a liar or a cheater, but just to have peace of mind, I occasionally snoop.
A majority of the time, I don’t plan to snoop on him, but when the opportunity presents itself to be nosy, my eyes wander.
Like the time I really did need to check my email, and when I went to login to Gmail, he was still logged into his account. I opened one or two emails that looked less than spammy, business-like and work related, and was pleased to see that the coast was clear. No shady business. No thirsty chicks lurking. No inappropriate messages or suspicious proof of purchase/confirmation emails. And as for that one message that popped up with the name of one of my best girlfriends, it was about the details for a birthday soiree they were trying to throw for me…
I felt bad about that at the time, but the good news is that I was able to fake a look of honest surprise at my birthday party a month later, which was fabulous by the way.
But back to the messiness.
I’ve also looked at some text messages. The trick is to catch him slipping when he’s in the bathroom. If he takes a magazine with him (time for No. 2) or is preparing for a shower, usually, the coast is clear. Again, I didn’t intend to go through the phone, but when a message came through and the name on the phone was unfamiliar, you know I had to do some investigating.
Did I or did I not say that I was nosy? Stop judging with your facial expressions, please and thank you.
There was one suspicious message from a young woman who said she was glad to see him at the bookstore. But before I could go through heart palpitations and let the rage flow, she went on to say something about planning to send in a book recommendation that she told my boyfriend her husband raved about. Another coast clear.
And yes, I’ve gawked at some receipts from time to time. If he really didn’t want me to look at them, he would shred them. Am I right?
And there was a time that I flipped through a few notebooks he keeps when he was off at the gym. Unfortunately, I can’t spill the tea on what was going down in those pages. Not because the information was especially embarrassing or heartbreaking, but because my man writes in chicken scratch. Beautiful man, ugly handwriting.
Like I said, I’m not proud of it. And I’ll admit that my nosy behavior came about from my experiences in a few past relationships. I trusted the wrong men and they were messing around with whomever they could find. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know I should do better, especially since my current boyfriend hasn’t given me a reason to be so suspicious. But it’s a process to trust, a hard one, and until I can fully get through that process, my eyes will continue to wander. And if I keep playing it safe, he’ll never know…
