Why Your Man Shouldn’t Be Your Best Friend

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June 22, 2010 ‐ By Elaine G. Flores

"Dean McDermott"

I’m going to say something: I’m really over the whole “My man is my best friend” thing. I bring this up because I was vexed on Saturday when I went in to get my nails did and had to wait around for some whipped husband who was hogging up the pedicure chair next to his wife getting — I kid you not — a French pedicure.  

The henpecked husband looked a little sheepish, as his wife bossily picked out their matching polish shades (OPI’s Sand In My Suit). Sorry, that is just not a good look.  I’m all for well-groomed men, but please fellas, do it with dignity.

A couple of weeks ago I swear to you that I watched a woman in the tampon aisle going on and on and on to her man about the level of absorption she needed.

Here’s the thing about the “best friend” school of thought, it seems to me that too many women are looking to turn their husbands or significant others into their best girlfriends and then have the nerve to ask: “Where are all the real men at?” This is not to say that men need to revert back to the tiring Alpha Male way of being where they can’t show any emotion or break out of the mold a little bit, but I don’t know that they all need to be running with us to go see Carrie and the girls in Sex and The City 2 either and they most certainly don’t need to be weighing in on the tampon choice.

Here are a few questions to get the conversation going:

If your man is now your best friend, what does that say about your previous best friend who hung with you all those years. Does that person get demoted?

If your man is your best friend, how long are you going to be able to sustain a hot, intimate relationship before you just become buddies? Best friends aren’t all that Hot.

Are fellas really yearning for this kind of relationship with the special woman in their lives or have they just become too neutered and afraid to speak their minds?

For married Madames, I believe that a husband should be a soulmate and the most important person in your world. Mine is, but frankly, that transcends the “best friend” label in my view and makes the relationship much more sacred and deeper than the best friend connection.

A sister I respect said it best: “A man needs to be more of a man than I am.”

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