Social media can bring out a lot of things in a lot of people.
Like a provocative/scandalous side. Hence the reason some young women post half-naked pictures on sites like Instagram and Facebook, all looking for validation from men they’ll never meet.
It can also bring out one’s often hidden political ties. Like the people who you know from your neighborhood but never realized they hated President Obama and Democrats in general. Awkward.
And then there’s that volatile emotional side with a hint of TMI that you forgot about. Like the high school classmate who lets everyone know that her son’s father is a deadbeat on Father’s Day.
And who could forget the troll side? Like the Black guy from college who says, “Why do we care so much when police kill us, but not when we kill one another?” Aaaaaaand block.
And in some cases, social media can just bring out the absolute worst in people. Like your family. While they show one side of themselves in your face at family gatherings, some do the absolute most on social media because they either want attention, or because you never actually realized how big of an asshole they really are. Their behavior is almost block-worthy.
Like the family member who feels the need to debate you on damn near everything you say.
A few years ago, I said that I wasn’t really a fan of Tyler Perry’s For Colored Girls. Not because I have some sort of vendetta against Perry, but because I felt that the stories of some characters were poorly developed compared to others. Around that time, every person I knew thought For Colored Girls would get nominated for an Academy Award and become a modern-day classic (it didn’t). And being the odd voice out, I was immediately side-eyed and called out–by my cousin nonetheless.
“Wow. How do you not like the movie? Those were real women with real stories. Just be glad that you’ve never had to go through anything cuz.”
But, of course, my lack of appreciation for one film about a group of Black women facing personal crises had to be a testament to the fact that I’d never gone through anything and only disliked the film because I couldn’t relate. Thanks a lot, “cuz.”
That same cousin has since made it their mission to get on my very last nerve each and every time I post a status on social media. So I refrain from doing so these days to keep the peace.
What about the family member who throws you under the bus to gain sympathy from fake “friends”?
You know who I’m talking about. The plan is simple enough: Paint the rest of your family members as ungrateful, trifling, conniving, unsupportive, hurtful and narcissistic individuals, play victim, and in turn, get people to tell you how awesome of a person you are and how sucky said family members are in comparison.
Like my friend’s cousin who took to social media to call out “so-called family” she felt weren’t doing enough to support her mother, who is battling Alzheimers. The cousin, who looks after her ailing mother during the evenings and barely likes to, said that if it weren’t for her husband and son, she wouldn’t be able to hold on to her sanity and take care of her mom. They have been her anchor because the rest of her family, including my friend, had allegedly up and left her to do everything for her mother on her own.
“All that my mom has done for all these so-called family members and they haven’t called, nobody checks on her. I do this on my own.”
And as my friend read her cousin’s status in disgust, she was even more appalled to see complete strangers attacking her and the rest of the family based on a status.
“Forget them,” one man said. “You can do this. Your mother is blessed to have someone so supportive on her side.”
“You don’t need them,” another said.
“Let me know if you need anything, I’ll be praying for you, girl,” another colleague chimed in.
Instead of telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, my friend’s cousin soaked up the praises and tainted her family’s name for likes: “Thanks so much for the support. I really needed it!”
And how about the family member who posts all kinds of strange things? You know the ones. When you try to tell them that they’re doing too much, they post froggy viral threats?
You’ve read the statuses. They usually read, and look, something like this: I WISH some body would TELL ME what I can and cannot put on my Facebook page!!! If you don’t like it DELETE ME!!!!! Your lost! Cause I’m grown!”
They’re the same family members who send subliminal shots calling folks everything but a child of God, only to turn around and post Bible passages one minute and WorldStar videos the next. Who can keep up?
Yes, social media brings out a whole different side of people, including family, that you would prefer not to be bothered with. While your cousin or your uncle may seem sweet and tame at the family reunion and Christmas gathering, they might be nothing but a troll on these Internet streets, looking to debate, overshare and write angry messages in all caps on Facebook (because you know there’s no word count on Facebook).
But pat yourself on the back. Despite their shenanigans, you’ve managed not to unfriend them or tell them how you really feel. You didn’t block them. And you didn’t completely abandon your social media pages in order to avoid them. Probably because at the end of the day, it’s just the Internet. And until there’s a button to easily block people in real life, you’re just going to have to play nice and try not take it all too personal.
Or start denying and ignoring family friend requests…
