Baby Showers For Men? No, Thank You.

February 1, 2013  |  

I love modern parenting. Blended families, stay at home dads, and other perfectly normal ways to raise children that were not the norm not too long ago enrich everyone’s parenting experience. It’s wonderful that our children will grow up in a world with such diversity. I do have my limits, though. I am fully against baby showers for men.

Some people call them Dadchelor parties (or Dadelor parties). I call them one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard of. More dumb (and less funny) than that banana slicer I saw on Amazon. What’s the point?

Is the impending arrival of one’s first born child cause to get drunk and/or hang out with strippers?

Coed baby showers are wonderful. It took two people to make a baby why shouldn’t it take two to celebrate it? I don’t consider them solely a woman’s realm. I’m not traditionally very girly when it comes to things like weddings or baby showers. My husband and I are low key and enjoy spending time together.

It didn’t make sense for me to exclude him from a special event that had a whole lot to do with him. The baby showers that were thrown for me were not over-the-top feminine and had men in attendance. Lovely celebrations of a new life that we both appreciated very much. Nothing gender specific. Just a simple, good time for everyone.

Not once did it cross my mind that perhaps my husband would rather be chilling with some tools at a bar or sitting in a dimly lit room with an overly fragrant glittery dancer gyrating half naked in the near distance. I wouldn’t have married that kind of man. I feel the same way about bachelor parties too. I dislike everything they stand for. I have nothing against drinking or dancing ladies; it’s the message.

If a man believes that the good times are over because he is getting married to me or because our child will soon be born, he isn’t the man for me.

Yes, I’m judging. I think these events are pathetic excuses for today’s Seth Rogen rom-com character-esque man children who never want to grow up and look for any excuse to party. Man up, fools. You’re about to have a baby, not walk the green mile. You’ll see Biff and Todd again. I promise.

Parenthood isn’t a prison. It’s a privilege. If these events were truly about the celebration of a new father they wouldn’t need to be exclusive to males. Shouldn’t they involve the whole family?

It could just be another clever marketing tactic. I almost passed out when I saw the Yankee Candle Man Candle line. For real? Men need their own smells too? What exactly does Man Town smell like? Let me guess: feet, old cheese, and the quiet desperation of another night spent sleeping on the basement couch. Gross. Who are these people?

I’m anti most gender specific things. Men do not need their own candles.  Men do not need their own icky baby showers. Lastly, no man needs a cave unless he is in fact a caveman and in that case he shouldn’t be allowed in any modern dwelling. Alert the authorities or at least your local museum curator.

Dadchelor parties. Innocent fun or pathetic excuse to be party?

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