The Courage To Go On: Taking Care of Children After A Major Surgery

January 19, 2013 ‐ By Kay Hudson

Who will care for your children when you are released?

The naïve social worker looked empathetically at me.

As I lay in my hospital gown, I stared that women in the eye and said:

“I will take care of them – end of story.”

Her shock should not have surprised me. I had just been taken off Propifol (yeah, the meds that Michael Jackson took) and maybe it clouded my vision. I had suffered a bilateral hemorrhage, a stroke. I was given a fifty percent chance of survival. I was told that it was a miracle that I could function – walk, talk, all of it.

Fast forward – 2 weeks after being discharged there were no outward signs of my disability. All that I was experiencing I kept to myself. My mom, fooled by my brave façade had gone back home, my husband to work, and I was left alone for 12 hour long days with a one month old and a 2 year old. What was I going to do?

Expectant moms who had a fear of poop, or anxiety around bathing newborns, after giving birth, we often realize that maternal instincts are just that – instinctual. I had the stroke just a week after giving birth to my second son. I was weak. But my children needed me. Maternal instincts did kick in, but I learned quickly that I had to be purposeful about the way I approached raising my babies.

If you just had a surgery or a major diagnosis that has killed your spirit – here are some of the things that I have utilized throughout my recovery that helped me both emotionally and practically;

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