There’s a lot of spitting and cussing about wll.i.am’s comments during an Elle magazine interview about how “tacky” it is for single women to have condoms in their homes.
I mean, really. It’s soooo tacky to have some forethought and desire to preserve one’s health.
But I guess it’s not “tacky” that 73% of black children are born out-of-wedlock, many of whom were conceived because some black woman also believed it was tawdry to protect her vagina just in case her and her date got caught up in the heat of the moment. And how crude of her to not want to be vulnerable to the high incidence of STD and HIV transmission within the black community? Who the heck does she think she is, a white girl?
“His attitude is exactly that judgmental and condemning attitude that black men have about black women’s sexuality. It puts black women in a box and makes the woman have to pretend to be something she’s not in order to meet the approval and acquire the affection of a man,” says Deborrah Cooper, relationship expert, radio personality and operator of SurvivngDating.com.
The sad truth is that young black women are force-fed this bull-donkey in church, and well-meaning family members that ‘good girls’ don’t buy condoms. And when you get knocked up because there were no condoms in the side table, you can say it “just happened.”
The performer said this in his interview: “I just think, like, if you’re into someone and you guys get to that level, then that’s something you should converse about together and say, “Hey, maybe we should get some.”
Huh. Okay; so you’re hot and heavy with a guy, clothes are off, and certain body parts are…uh…activated, and you expect people to stop getting down to have some type of DISCUSSION?
What do you think about women who have condoms, Madame Noire readers?
Christelyn D. Karazin is a health writer and the co-author of Swirling: How to Date, Mate and Relate Mixing Race Culture and Creed (to be released February 2012), and runs a blog, www.beyondblackwhite.com, dedicated to women of color who are interested and or involved in interracial and intercultural relationships. She is also the founder and organizer of “No Wedding, No Womb,” an initiative to find solutions to the 72 percent out-of-wedlock rate in the black community. Join the #NWNW conversation on Twitter.