As I sat across from him during lunch, I was amazed at how many questions he asked and how interested he was in me. He told me how he was ready to be in a relationship, have a family, and basically live happily ever after…but not exactly in those words. We even spoke about Valentine’s Day, which at the time, was soon approaching. He told me that he was going to make dinner reservations for us. He had even started coming up with plans for us to hang out the weekend after. He called me “his future” and frequently referred to me as “baby” throughout the date. And while all of this sounds like a dream come true, it was actually a nightmare for me. Why? Because it was only our first date. This guy was charming, but he was also extremely thirsty.
I’m not some young, naive girl who doesn’t know how to handle a nice guy and would rather deal with a ‘bad boy.’ I want my partner to be both nice and a gentleman. What I don’t want is a guy who just met me and is trying to ‘wife’ me all in the same day. Besides it being unattractive, it’s also creepy.
We have all heard that nice guys finish last. I disagree. Nice guys only finish last in relationships when they’re dealing with a woman who doesn’t truly appreciate them. So yes, I do believe that gentlemen prevail, but thirsty men who jump out the gates too fast? Not so much.
Okay, maybe I should have been flattered that this guy was so into me so soon. As much as I’d like to think that I’m just that girl, I know he would have put his bid in for any woman he found attractive that would give him the time of day. He was not that into me. He was simply into the idea of me. Homeboy wanted a family and he wanted one fast, and in no time flat, he had me pegged as a great prospect to help him obtain all that.
Some may argue he is a guy who simply knows what he wants, but his approach was much too strong and came too soon for me. And on that date, he even hinted that he had been told several times before that he comes on too strong. His response to the ‘haters’? He is a man who goes after what he wants. But despite his reasoning, I knew his infatuation was more about finding himself in a relationship than me.
Don’t get me wrong, I love a man who knows what he wants, and I appreciate a nice guy. In fact, I want a nice guy; but being so forward with someone you just met is not a good thing. No one wants a person who appears desperate.
So while I don’t believe that nice guys finish last, I do believe that the thirsty ones do.
