Relationship Debate: ‘I Think My Friend’s Boyfriend May Be Gay’

March 29, 2011  |  

Dear China,

I think my friend’s boyfriend might be gay. He has a lot of female friends (not booty call friends but shopping friends), he’s VERY well kept, and he’s overly sexual to prove his “manhood.” My other friend also saw him in a gay club. Should I tell her?

Sincerely,
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?

Dear Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,
Sure, you should tell her your friend saw him at gay club. No big deal…you’d probably tell her if someone else you know mutually saw you or him or whomever, at some other place, right? So, mentioning where you saw someone is conversational, and a matter of friendly chatting and networking.

Though the place in question is a gay club, followed by what you’re perceiving as mounting evidence that he’s gay, you should probably let your friend do much of the talking when you tell her. You can’t really be accusatory in tone, because being well-kept, over sexual, befriended by many females and getting your groove on in a gay club are part of your evidence files, but they’re not the actual act. It’s important to approach your friend nonchalantly if you’re to discuss her boyfriend’s sexuality. Make it less of a war room than a light-hearted girl talk exploration into the lives of your men…both yours and hers!

I want the readers give you their thoughts on this hot topic as well. Readers, take it away!

Au revoir,
~ Madame C.

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