10 Things They Don’t Tell You About Going Natural

March 26th, 2011 - By Veronica Wells


There’s this “new” movement amongst black women. I don’t know if you’ve heard about it. Not all, but many are abandoning the once coveted boxes of relaxers and replacing them with restorative oils and headwraps inspired by Erykah Badu. You know what it is. It’s a transition to natural. Going natural. If you’ve made the journey yourself read these revelations and see if you agree, if you’re thinking about it, heed these warnings and if you love your bone straight tresses read what your fellow sisters are going through out here.

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  • Lynn

    This article is ridiculous. I have never read Madam Noire and after reading this article, I will never read or visit this website again. How very disappointing.

  • zaksmama

    I've been natural for 16 years, and I tell you, the thing I don't miss at all is spending every Saturday in the salon for 48 hours of decent looking hair, then looking at Hell's Own Coiffure for the next 5 days. I love being able to style my hair myself without a beautician's license or professional-level tools. I love it that my hair can grow past my ears and not look like it's been through a shredder due to over-processing for that bone-straight look. I love not having to fear water like the Devil, even with a perm. Go for a relaxer if you like the look and the upkeep doesn't drive you mad, but I swear I could have bought a car with the money wasted trying to make my hair look passable when God made it beautiful.

  • nauturagal

    When I wore my hair natural, I got more compliments from non black men than black men.

    • maru-chan

      Right??!!?! White dudes have been stepping to me since day one of rocking my 'fro but when I got locked a lot of east Asian dudes, especially Chinese guys complimented me and asked me on dates. I was like "whaaaa?" It blew my mind!!!

      • Jyoung Jm

        I think when white men see a black woman with natural hair they think she’s “liberated” and “free” and will give it up quick, I dont like the assumption and I’m natural at the moment myself but some white men have told me that and I give them absolutely NO reason for them to think that way.

  • http://www.mygmagazine.com Vivian

    Thank You for this! I have been debating going back to my natural or staying with my perm. Thanks for your honesty! :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/APeachJ Ashley Jones

    I've read so many negative comments about the article but what I find most interesting is that every one of the negative posts took the article as saying that if you had natural hair, you was unsure of yourself or if you had permed hair, you didn't love yourself…ppl the article was written to given a different point of view on the journey of going natural!!!!!!! Some of you are so ignorant to the concept of respecting other's points-of-view, it's ridiculous!!!! I for one can agree with many of the points touched on. As an AA woman who works in Corporate America, who is extremely active in sports, and is in her first six-month stretch of transitioning to natural, I have experienced many of the points discussed.

    • http://www.facebook.com/APeachJ Ashley Jones

      I have gotten "the look" from people when walking down the street or in business meetings. It has been extremely difficult for me to maintain my hair especially on those days when I have gone to the gym and worked out. The nap's growing on the back of neck does look like little pubic hairs. I have encountered several black men that do not like women who wear their hair natural! Just because all scenarios don't fit your life, they obviously fit someone's life! Stop being so damn confrontational….There are ways to express your points of view without being so defensive. The author isn't attacking U!!!!! U all sound like a bunch of ANGRY BLACK WOMEN who needs to understand that your hair represents who u are, not the other way around.

      THAT IS ALL.

  • Denean

    Interesting points. I have been natural for about 4 years now and I have to say that I concur it takes a little more effort to maintain, but it's fun at the same time to see your hair thickening back up and seeing your true hair texture. Perming my hair made it thinner, but that's just me, everyone's hair is different. So, no I do not see myself going back to permed hair.

  • Aimee Jason

    Wow! Where do folks get this crap at? I have been natural for 9 years…it will be 10 if I live and breath to see June 2011. I decided to no longer relax my hair due to an experience that had nothing to do with the chemical treatment itself…or just wanting to be me. I had a relaxer put in my hair by a friend and while washing out the relaxer in her drain I had a panic attack. I am claustrophobic so the no breathing space in the drain freaked me out. I had to jump in her shower n wash my own hair out. The thought of the chems touching my skin freaked me and not to mention the length of time the relaxer was left on my hair. So I stopped relaxing after that. I never did the BC. I just went through phases of growth n fall out. But one things for sure I wish i had stopped relaxing sooner…I love my natural texture…it's all me..and like everything else about me…its uniquely me! I find that its all about confidence in you…how you look…what you like..knowing and appreciating who your are. Knowing yourself is a battle sometimes. All I would tell folks that are considering going chem free is don't do it if its just going to be just a fashion trend or statement…do it because you want to…do it because you feel like its time to let go and embrace the natural beauty that God had blessed you with. Treat your mane with kindness and love…and it will love you back! And that goes for any hair type or style. Love yourself…and know yourself…and don't worry about what others may think…they don't live for you. If ya don't like my doo…too bad for you! Peace & Blessings!

  • Reese

    Great article! KUDOS!!! I definitely could relate to many of the points raised. Transitioned for 2 years (no BC here) and been natural for 9 years.It is not an easy road. Finally someone is keeping it real!!! I do not think this article is meant to discourage women from going natural. Unfortunately we tend to only highlight the positives of being natural without talking about some of the frustrations. I feel this is doing a disservice to those who are transitioning or newly natural because they 1. Are unprepared 2. Think they are the only ones facing some of these issues.

  • Hadasah

    When are black women simply going to love themselves for who they are and how they were born?!!!!!! How is the hair that comes out of the pores of your scalp hard, unacceptable, difficult etc….whose standard do we have to live up to? Who told you that your hair was hard to deal with unless you were comparing it to someone else of a different race or culture. I bet they don't feel that way in Africa…our homeland…where this stuff on our heads come from. Let's all stop frontin' !!! It's not about hair management or social whatever….You were born this way…think about it! Who told you there was anything wrong with your hair…who said it was too tight, tangled, hard, or coarse, or too ethnic!!! Black women have thicker, stronger, curlier, kinkier, or more coarse hair because of their African descent!!! When did this become a problem for a lot of you? It's natural for us to have this hair. In fact all throughout this article everytime you read the words going natural, afro, locks, braids, twists etc…just insert the words being black or being African..We should train them to accept our hair the same way they have to accept our presence, our skin, and our culture!!! Peace

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Shannon-Melanie-Scott/503182843 Shannon Melanie Scott

    Honestly, Natural hair is the best way to go. I can say this because I was relaxed for 20 years (sounds weird cuz Im still really young) and my hair is just about the same length it was before I did my Big Chop (20 months ago). I had medium arm pit length hair the majority of my life never getting any longer just thinner because of the chemical from the relaxers. So in less than 2 years later I'm back at the same length but my hair is SOOOO much healthier and its all mine. Just imagine what the next two years will bring. Check out my Youtube video I'll prove it :D http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-kg6bgwrDo

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Shannon-Melanie-Scott/503182843 Shannon Melanie Scott

    If you saw balls beads of hair dangling off if was simply time for a trim. I've been natural close to a year now and I love it. My hair is back to its original length when I did my Big Chop medium/arm pit length (APL).

  • MsG.

    I have a hard time understanding women who are natural that choose to act out defensively in their online posts. Really the underyling problem is the disunity that we have as black women. we should be celebrating the diversity of our beauty, rather than forcing our ideals on others- and this works both ways. Sometimes I feel that women who choose to "go natural" – and i say this to refer to women who are "newly natural" want to judge others. Women who relax their hair are not necessarily brainwashed, self-hating, unhealthy, vain, or any other negative qualities that sometimes people tend to associate us with. Feel confident about the choices you make in your life. Don't seek validation from others.

  • Shell

    This is a good article that makes MANY relevant points… Maybe I'm biased, but it seemed to take to many anti-natural jabs..

  • a girl named eddy

    This article was spectacular. Thanks for posting

  • hahahahaha

    ok the article is what it is. As a natural, I love my hair and I will leave it at that for now. But no one has commented on the picture of the litte girl getting her hair detangled with a FORK. Ummmm wide tooth combs exist for a reason Ok go back to your debte. hahahhahaha

  • lkanony

    (cont.) Later, the perm became a beauty “fad”. Also note that blond hair color (along with red hair) is looked upon as being rare and unusual, thus, blond hair also became a beauty “fad”. The article is merely stating what DOES/CAN happen when some women get “gung ho” about natural hair. I've been witness to it myself and even been the target of innuendos when it comes to my hair (which YES, I personally prefer perms, wigs/weaves to natural looks) from peers who are wearing their hair natural. Now would it be fair for me or anyone else to discourage THEM from wearing their hair in a natural hairstyle as oppose to wearing their hair relaxed/straightened or in weaves? What may suit some women doesn't suit others….I agree with the article that it's merely a preference, and it doesn't have to imply that a woman with relaxed hair “…doesn't love herself…” In fact, she may be a woman that loves herself enough to know that she DOES NOT need to conform to blond hair or the natural look (ESPECIALLY/PARTICULARLY if it really doesn't suit her BEST) in order to receive acceptance (less judgment) from peers that do, or because “EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING IT”.

    • Belmoun Ibolele'

      @ Ikanony, I respect your opinion regarding the preference issues when it comes to black hair. However, The majority of black women who perm their hair do it for lack of self-esteem. Yet, black men are responsible for all that mess. Black people in the past and until now, have never been seen by the world with a positive view when it comes to beauty, therefore, we try to assimilate with the European standard of beauty. Subsequently, that effects us in every way possible. Black athletes in general prefer to have children with women who are light skin/ curly hair. To make matter worse black people are more racist against themselves than any other groups. that's the reason when a person such as myself who is pro-black speaks, a lot of people give me the crazy look, because it's not common for black people to to show love and admiration toward their hair and skin color. Blacks always want to be lighter in complexion and definitely wish they had curly hair. You can't be be truly free, until you reject the European standard of beauty along with their religion and the names the gave us. Although, slavery has been over, but the fact still remains with the names with carry today. We should have changed our names a long time ago.

      • Dmommie

        Belmoun Ibolele, every minority group has issues with regard to the European standard of beauty. The light skin vs dark skin complex is prevalent in Hispanic, Indian, Asian and even white folk. Permed hair does not equal lack of self esteem. Personally, I would prefer short, relaxed hair to long ,unmanageble natural hair. My hair is extremely thick and coarse. Have you considered the fact that perhaps black women choose to relax their hair because it makes their hair easier to manage? No, I don't love hair that it hurts to comb out and that I have to spend countless hours to maintain. Don't be so judgmental.

        • http://www.demeriese.com Demerise

          If your hair hurts to comb it out, then you're not using the right products to style it. You can't use the same products on natural hair that you use on relaxed hair. Natural hair also requires a lot of moisture too. I used to have a thick afro also, but after I did some research on how to take care of my hair it was plenty manageable. But I do feel you on wrestling with thick hair, that's why I just locked my hair. Best hair decision I've ever made.

  • lkanony

    I like your point in regards to White women dyeing their hair blond. But in a way, this point becomes contradictory to the rest of your comment. You see, you're making a point about women "inhancing"/changing their look but it seems to state it's "O.K." for White women to do as they please with hair alterations but the Black women shouldn't feel comfortable doing the same when it comes to perms and weaves. Personally, I feel that blond doesn't even suit all White women the same way I feel all natural hairstyles don't suit all Black women, but women do it anyway. Remember the perm was initially invented to make natural hair more manageable. Later,

  • MsT

    Well I for one thought it was a good article. The author was trying to make a point that going natural aint all “peaches and cream” for a lot of people. It is difficult. And all the ppl who have been natural for years this article wasn’t for us. It was for those who are going natural now, and some of the unforeseen difficulties they might encounter. If you were used to the idea that “nappy= ugly” (like many of us were, before thinking of going natural) the transition stage can be difficult as far as learning to accept your hair as is. And I totally agree with her that a lot of natural women are on this high horse, and they wanna convert all black women. But let’s face it, not all women look good natural!!!! Yep, I said it. Us black women like for our hair to LOOK nice. Now I do believe that most women look better with natural hair just bc I like big hair, but few women look better with straight hair. If that’s their preference, who are we to tell them otherwise?? It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that anything that burns your scalp, and can leave sores and blisters is bad for it.

  • BeaMea

    I remember that!!! Skuddles the Seagull. Well damn now i feel old…lol.

  • Alexis H

    To me it sounds like we didn't even read the same article. This article in no way bashed natural or relaxed hair.(It actually seems more PRO-natural) It simply explained some of the difficulties of being natural. Being natural is no walk in the park. Kinky hair IS difficult. It's delicate, easily tangled, and prone to dryness. That's not to say relaxed hair is easier because it too has it's challenges. But obtaining healthy natural hair can be done and is BEAUTIFUL! Also, once women have become naturally successful with their hair some DO tend to get over zealous and try to force there natural hair views on relaxed women who don't want to hear it. At the end of the day hair is a personal choice. Relaxed or natural. Both had their pros and cons. As a natural woman, I personally liked the article.

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