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It’s slim pickings out here. Finding a good man is like finding a needle in a haystack on a Wednesday in Antarctica. It’s hard!

And as women, we often feel like we have to follow paradigms we’ve set up ourselves — you know, don’t call him, (wait two weeks, until) he’ll call you — for us to control our emotions and keep our pride. But in the 21st century, the game is a little different. Although men seek the same qualities in women and women in men, the packaging we come in differs these days. Not only are women open to dating men of various ethnicities, but we’re also giving play to the young bucks.

Cougar = “A 35+-year-old female who is on the ‘hunt’ for a much younger, energetic, willing-to-do-anything male.” (According to UrbanDictionary.com)

Only two years ago, Mariah Carey was thought crazy (among other reasons) for marrying Nick Cannon, a man 11 years younger than her. More recently, Shaunie O’Neal, Shaquille O’Neal’s ex-wife and mother of six, has been catching flack for dating a man twelve years younger than her.

Meanwhile, the first thought running through our minds is: why is she robbing the cradle, is she that desperate? And secondly, why is he with her and her baggage, doesn’t he want a more vibrant woman? These questions are at the core of why women avoid a relationship with a youngin. Not only do we fear public ridicule, but we question if a man in his early twenties is strong enough to handle a strong woman.

Funny thing is, the age difference has never been a question for men. Matter of fact, Kimora Lee was 23 when she wed a 41-year-old Russell Simmons. Beyonce, at 26, married a 38-year-old Jay-Z and back in the day Diana Ross was 27 when she had 42-year-old Berry Gordy’s daughter. There’s a complete double standard when it comes to dating, but as hard as the double standard is, finding a quality man who will love and cherish you may be harder.

So don’t fight the feeling! If he’s of age, serious about getting to know you and genuine…Why not give it a try?

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