Temper Triggers to Avoid in a Relationship

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March 16, 2011 ‐ By China Okasi

Sometimes you catch an attitude in a relationship and it’s very well-deserved. In fact, it might lead you to uncover some more issues that should anger you and some trifling behavior that should alert you of a relationship that needs to end. Other times, however, you may be growing furious over issues that are really non-issues. Here are a few triggers that you can avoid, if your lover is on the straight and narrow, and you agree that you just need to chill:

1. Social media triggers
Please control your temper around your lover’s Facebook and Twitter pages, unless you see a post or a tweet that is very obviously problematic. A girl telling your man “hi” or wishing him a “happy birthday” does not qualify as very obviously problematic. So, put a lid on it, and do not allow the electronic world to overpower the real world!

2. Delayed callback trigger
Yes, people are supposed to call you back when you call them, and they are supposed to call you frequently if you two are in a relationship. But, sometimes, incidents prevent a speedy callback, and it’s possible that those “incidents” are not seedy in nature. Don’t allow the “delayed callback” syndrome that your lover has, to get the best of you. Simply articulate that you need it, and you expect to give it in return. If your lover does not take heed, then you can make a decision as to whether you need to leave. No need to go crazy.

3. Mention of “the ex” trigger
Many people have exes, and many have exes they do not cuss to death. As a result, you don’t need to go flaring your nostrils at the mention of your lover’s ex. Hopefully, your lover doesn’t mention the ex too many times or with too much “unfinished business” fervor, but if he does – just leave. No need to go crazy.

4. “Working late” trigger
Now, if you’re dating a workaholic, lawyer, high-stakes professional or damn-near celeb like some people, this trigger can be hardest to control! Yes, we know. But, don’t let the “working late” scenario get you frazzled or down. Don’t let a busy working schedule deteriorate your temper. Simply study your lover’s work patterns and form an understanding around them. Ensure that even if your lover’s working late, he’s also taking great care of you. If he’s fulfilling the latter faithfully, then no need to go crazy.

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  • Prissy

    VERY good things written in this article! ALL of these are true, and sad because ALL of us have been guilty of at LEAST one of these.

  • Richad Benbow

    This is definitely a good article. I am in 100% agreement.