“I Never Wanted Kids:” Aisha Tyler Says It’s Okay To Choose A Professional Life Over Motherhood

September 3, 2014  |  

HuffPost Live

Last year on “The Talk,” host Aisha Tyler openly shared with her co-hosts and viewers that she struggled to conceive. Married for 22 years, the Daily Mail reported Tyler wasn’t able to get pregnant after going off of birth control and she also has a tortuous Fallopian tube, making it harder for sperm to reach the egg for fertilization to occur.

After the tearful revelation on the show, Tyler decided to share her story with more media outlets to let women know it’s okay if they don’t have children. Yesterday on HuffPost Live, Tyler spoke to host Nancy Redd about the validity of women choosing a career over parenthood, saying:

“It was important to me for two reasons, three actually. The first one was that I have been a professional woman for my entire life and I think this is a relatively new issue for women who have chosen work over family, which is a completely valid choice and no one should ever feel embarrassed or regretful about that. It’s a valid choice. Men never have to make that choice. It’s one that I’ve also embraced fully. I never wanted kids. I loved what I did. I was really passionate about it. And then my husband and I got to a place where we were like ‘Well we’re going to run out of road soon. If we’re going to do it, we should try it now.’ And we started to get into it and when we found out that it was going to be difficult to impossible, it really was a choice to stop. I feel like I wanted families [and] couples to know that it was a valid choice not to get on this crazy merry-go-rounds of IVF and [spend] tens and tens of thousands of dollars.”

And for people who still shout “IVF” as if it’s the answer to all fertility problems, Aisha added this reminder:

“People who do what I do for a living can afford that stuff, but most people can’t. They mortgage their homes and they break themselves. And by the way, most of them don’t get pregnant. We only focus on the Cinderella stories. We don’t focus on all the people that don’t do it. And I wanted people to feel — men and women — it’s okay to say, ‘I love my marriage, I love my life, I choose not to have children.'”

Although Tyler and her husband stopped trying for children of their own, she has not confirmed if they will adopt in the near future.

Watch Tyler’s segment on HuffPost Live, below.

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