Ask A Very Smart Brotha: How Do You Know When It’s Time To Move On?
Shanally: What does a guy means when he says “I want to be in a committed relationship with you but I’m not ready ”
DY: It means he doesn’t want to be in a committed relationship with you.
Porusuchi: I know this sounds silly but I’m dead serious. My guy watches twerk videos sometimes. No big deal but I told him as long as he watches them I will be posting my own. He gets angry. Am I wrong? Should he be mad about this? Or is it justified?
DY: You probably should have stopped at “I know this sounds silly…”. If you have a problem with your man watching twerk videos, fine. But “Well, I’m just gonna make one of my own” is a terrible response. I mean, if he had a porn habit, would you start “hanging out” with Brian Pumper?
Byanca: Why do guys think it’s okay to play with a girls feelings? How hard is it to be upfront and tell her that you’re not ready for a relationship instead of dragging her along?
DY: For many people (men and women) dragging out a lie is just easy than telling the truth. Thing is, it’s not actually easier at all. The lie takes more effort and energy, and leaves more broken hearts/collateral damage. But people believe it is, so they continue to do it.
Brittany: Thank for your advice in advance. How do you know when it’s time to just let a relationship go?
DY: When you find yourself asking that question over and over again. (And you’re welcome!)
Chanelle: Why do some men cheat, go through emotional panics when its over, just to do it again when given a chance?
DY: If you took them back before after cheating, why wouldn’t they think you’d take them back again?
Kris: Do guys who break up with a girl still have some feelings for her?
DY: Sometimes. But, usually, when a guy initiates the break-up, there’s no returning from that.
Pittsburgh native Damon Young (aka “The Champ”) is the co-founder of the ridiculously popular VerySmartBrothas.com Their first book “Your Degrees Won’t Keep You Warm At Night: The Very Smart Brothas Guide To Dating, Mating and Fighting Crime” is available at Amazon.com.