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By The Stir, From YourTango 

As someone who writes about sex and love for a living, I have heard a lot of advice on how to keep the passion alive over the years. One of the first things almost every sex expert will say is that you should continue to masturbate. It seems counter-intuitive, right?

If you are pleasing yourself, why would you need someone else? Au contraire, they say. In this case, it’s more about the feelings masturbation conjures. If you have a little pleasure, so they say, you will want more.

I say: It’s hooey.

Why? Because the fact is, when you satisfy yourself, you ARE satisfied. Full stop. This is a lesson I learned the hard way.

Nothing Wrong With It

Now, don’t get me wrong. Masturbation is a healthy activity for women. It teaches us how to find our own pleasure and ALL women should have a vibrator (or 10) in their nightstand. But, there’s also something to be said for the old adage: “good things come to those who wait.” And yes, that pun was intended. Times 1,000. Because they do.

I know this first hand (oh the puns, they are too easy!) as I gave up the use of my vibrator for a couple months and the results have been astounding. At first it happened by accident. We just became so insanely busy and I was never alone. The only times I even felt any sexual urges were when I was actually in the presence of my husband. So I started saving up my mojo.

Read this woman’s entire story on marriage and sex at YourTango.com 

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