Americans are conditioned to work hard and accumulate stuff. The more money you make, the more stuff you can accumulate. But did you know that materialism can actually make you miserable? This is backed by scientific research.
“Study after study has shown that a focus on acquiring stuff makes you unhappy, hurts your relationships, increases your feelings of isolation and self-doubt, causes you to be less resilient in crises, and makes you more prone to mental illness,” reports Inc.
Of course, most of the time we aren’t conscious that our materialism is harming us. “Seeking more is crucial to motivation and the inspiration to succeed,” wellness advocate Dr. Jameelah Medina tells MadameNoire via email. “However, seeking more and more can lead one to never be satisfied and to always look for something more, bigger, better, faster, newer, and nicer.”
Motivation in itself is a positive thing. But the reason behind your motivation must to be positive and not a need to fill a personal void. “Striving for more can be motivating and fun. It’s only a bad thing when you are striving for more because you think more is going to make you happy. ‘Once I hit this target, I’ll get the bonus and then I’ll be happy.’ The truth is–no you won’t be happy. You’ll feel good for a moment and then, you want more. There’s always more stuff to have and things to acquire, which means the chase never ends and happiness never comes,” adds life coach Angela Winfield.
But imagine if you begin to define yourself by your career and/or your possessions and then one day you’re fired or you lose your possessions in a fire for example. How would you then define yourself?
“When one defines his/her worth with material possessions, the foundation is weak,” explains Medina. “Possessions get stolen, stop working, become obsolete. There will always be someone with more. There is nothing wrong with having material things and even being proud of them. Confusion comes when the material things have the power to make or break a person’s self-esteem.”
But while you’re in the midst of materialism it may be hard to realize. “You can tell materialism has taken over when your health, relationships and well-being are suffering. When you have no time or energy to enjoy the things you’ve acquired and the money you have with the people you love because your time and energy is on getting more, materialism has taken over,” Winfield says.
There are ways to control your materialism. Define and actually write out your values. “Few of us would explicitly say that we value material goods over other things in life, so return your focus to what’s truly important to you by taking time to reflect on your values. Write down your thoughts and how (or if) your behavior lines up to your most deeply held beliefs,” reports Inc.
Along with defining your values, sit down and ponder what you really want out of life. “Start getting curious with yourself and identify what you really want. Start asking why. Why do I want more money? Why do I want this fancy car? Designer clothes? Why? If I die tomorrow, will I have accomplished all I’ve wanted to? Would I have made the difference I want to make? Get in touch with what you really want. What feeling or experience are you hoping you will get by acquiring the next thing?” asks Winfield.
Another way is to focus on giving more than receiving. And start by giving away some of your own possessions. “One can start by giving away older things that no longer add ‘value.’ The next step is to give away things that are a little harder to give away due to attachment,” advises Medina.
Keep your spending in check. Also monitor why you buy what you buy. “Track every penny you spend for a month, and then take a hard look at whether your spending reflects your values. If it doesn’t, think about what’s driving you to behave as you do: insecurity? the need to impress? peer pressure?” questions Inc.
Once you drop your materialistic side you probably will feel happy and even more productive, say experts. “When you aren’t materialistic, you are able to be truly and deeply connected to your work and your life. This connection frees you up to be creative, put your mark on things, make a difference, enjoy the process of work and actually do better work. Ironically, it also leads to greater success and happiness,” says Winfield. “When you are fueled by your personal passion instead of materialism, you’ll never want more because you will have more–meaning, purpose, connection and satisfaction. When you have these, the material wealth is the icing.”
