“I Was Scared” Brandy Nearly Cries Telling Oprah Why She Lied About Being Married

48 comments
July 31, 2014 ‐ By
Source: YouTube

Source: YouTube

In 2002, Brandy made a big announcement. She had married secretly and was six months pregnant. Then there was that reality tv show, “Brandy: Special Delivery” where we saw Brandy and her “husband,” Robert Smith together and watched the process of her giving birth to her daughter Sy’rai. Watching the show you could tell something was off between Brandy and Robert– I just never assumed that their whole relationship was a sham.

Either way, on a recent episode of Oprah’s “Where Are They Now,” Brandy comes back to sit on Oprah’s couch (or chair) and explain why she felt she needed to lie about having a child out of wedlock.

Oprah: I asked if you were married at the time and you said you were. Why did you say that?

Brandy: I said that I was married. Because at that time being pregnant out of wedlock was not a trend. It was not something that people praised. It was a sin. And I felt like I could not be honest about that. I felt the pressure of, again, having to be perfect. And I was scared. I thought that everything that I had worked hard for and everything that I worked to build, the image that I worked so hard to build was threatened. And I felt like having a child out of wedlock would ruin my career, everything that I had built.

And I’m really sorry for that because you just don’t lie to Oprah, okay?!

You can watch the video below.

In another part of the interview, Brandy explains why she doesn’t think she would have made it as a celebrity growing up in this day and age because people on social media can be so cruel. See what she had to say in the video below.

You can catch Brandy’s episode of “Where Are They Now” this Sunday, August 3 on OWN at 9 pm ET/PT.

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  • Pablo Cervantes

    What? “Back in 2002″? She is full of bull. Women have been breeding without benefit of marriage since time began. The stigma seems to have diminished in the 70’s…not a mere 12 years ago. Still doesn’t make it right.

  • http://ameliathermop.blogspot.com/ Amelia Thermopolis

    Aww Brandy. We understand. I swear this woman can do no wrong in my eyes.

  • kierah

    I just didn’t like that she carried the lie so far as to have a reality show surrounding it. Lie, but then lay looooowwww. That was too weird.
    Oprah forgave her long ago. Brandy was one of the youngins at the Legends Ball.

  • pow

    Thank you for being honest Brandy, and I understand. Such is the world of celebrities. Also having babies out of wedlock should never be a trend for the general public, the non rich/wealthy, but an unfortunate situation.

  • Mercedes

    I honestly don’t care either and the reason why she’s telling the truth is because the guy she was supposedly married to outed her on Wendy Williams show he told Wendy him and brandy never was married.

  • Cynthia Daniels

    I believe she felt the emotions she expressed and yes, now it is having your baby and by the way congrats in order. We are getting married yeah big deal . 2 days or until 2 years here goes the divorce papers so what. I am surprise it is not being televised the conception process besides showing the most precious maternal aspect of a woman her bare belly to the public like a trophy that is so not private and personal between husband and wife, god did not intend to have us make a mockery of his creative expressions of being with child, my opinion only.

  • MyTruth

    If no one has any conviction to change their sins or not to commit sins we’ll never change. I understand where she is coming from and it shouldn’t have been the norm. That’s the problem now in America. We let too many things go on and that’s why we are the modern day Sodom.

    • http://www.theblackfeminista.com mshenry70

      The problem with America is that we cling to White male patriarchal ideals about women that a woman is supposed be married when she has children.

      • oscardgrouch

        It isn’t white and patriarchal. In all cultures, up until now, you were to be married before children. For black people, who were bought and sold, raped and beaten and had children ripped from their mothers, and families torn apart, we should be promoting having children in wedlock and building strong marriages and families.

        • Kjb

          Wonderful, and totally on point! Do you realize that we have 1,2, and sometimes 3 generations of black people (yes I’m black and I’m only concerned at this time with black folks), where the children have NEVER lived in a home where there is/was a mother and a father, married and living together. And to continue to condone unmarried pregnancies leaves a hole in our communities, that no amount of fame, money and blind acceptance can fill. Sure it happens and will continue to happen, it’s just part of life but to openly accept this behavior (especially with our young girls), is sad, everyone wants to know and have their father and mother together!

          • Jillian

            @KJB, I understand your concern. But I don’t think unmarried pregnancies are the sole issue. One reason is that it’s nothing new. I’ve known men who have married women who already had children and raised them as their own. I personally know of quite a few men who did this years ago. It was considered the right thing to do.

            What’s happening now, in my opinion, is a breakdown in community and familial structure. Yes, as beneficial as public assistance and public housing has been and can be, it really fostered a division in black households, along with other influences. The example shown in the movie “Claudine” where a male figure couldn’t be present in the home or the woman couldn’t get benefits happened. Unfortunately, decades later, it become systematic and you have the situation you have today.

        • http://www.theblackfeminista.com mshenry70

          But some people do not want to get married. What about them? As long as they can afford the children they are having, why should they get married?

      • MiaSara

        Its funny how people are always quick to defend what they relate too, but just the other day everyone (including myself) bashed EJ for being a flamboyant queen.
        I hope you have this open mind regarding other areas of society.

      • MayBaby

        What the devil?!?!

  • smh

    It’s still not something that needs to be praised. I never congratulate a pregnant woman that’s not married. No need to encourage that nonsense.

    • Selena McQueen

      That is just plain ole ignorant smfh. And what u just wrote is nonsense Smh

      • oscardgrouch

        Why is it ignorant? Why shouldn’t women want to be married before having a baby. What’s ignorant is the number of black kids born out of wedlock. At one point it was taboo…now it’s just the norm. Sad.

        • Selena McQueen

          No it’s ignorant to say that a person have to be married in order to have kids and then u said the amount of black kids born out of wedlock. Excuse me but there’s black white Spanish Asian and a plethora of other rave who have kids born out of wedlock. Who are u TO judge God and I highly doubt that

          • smh

            I did not say a person had to be married in order to have kids. That would obviously be a lie because plenty have kids without marriage. What I said is that I, PERSONALLY, do not congratulate out of wedlock pregnancies because I, PERSONALLY, do not feel it is anything to be proud of.

          • SJF

            Why exactly should we care about the “plethora” of White, Spanish, and Asian people who are having children out of wedlock, exactly?

            • Selena McQueen

              I see you’re just as ignorant so I won’t even answer u

      • smh

        I don’t believe that ignorant is being used properly. You can say that it is rude, impolite, uncouth, politically incorrect etc, but ignorant is incorrect. Also, it is MY opinion. I do not praise situations that I do not agree with. I would never congratulate a man and his mistress getting pregnant. I would not congratulate a homeless drug addict for getting pregnant. So, why would I congratulate an unmarried couple getting pregnant? The last thing we need is to keep congratulating baby mamas. I only congratulate wives/husbands and MAYBE a fiancée every now and then.

        • Jillian

          @smh, actually, what you said is out of ignorance. The person did use the word appropriately.

          A child is another person, another spirit, coming to this planet. Why not congratulate the mom and surround them with love, hoping that despite the circumstances, the child will prosper. To do otherwise is indeed ignorant, in my opinion.

          People in my family and in my circle and many in my community have all be married before having children. So for me, even in my 30s, it would seem “strange” for me to have a child “out of wedlock.”

          However, that is me. I also know that there are couples who are very committed to one another who may forgo walking down the aisle. And they can probably provide for their children in ways that others could only dream of. A two-parent household doesn’t necessarily mean the parents have to be married.

          And a lot of very successful women are opting to have children on their own because they want to be a mother.

          It’s not so black and white.

          • smh

            Actually, it is NOT out of ignorance. Just because you disagree does not mean that what I am saying is out of ignorance. Your opinion does not discount mine. Ignorance = “lacking in knowledge or training; unlearned; unaware”. I am well aware that she is an unmarried, pregnant woman and I am making the conscience decision to not support that. NOWHERE in my statement did I say that unmarried parents cannot parent successfully and raise successful children. I stated MY point of view, just as you did yours. With that being said, I do not congratulate pregnant, unwed couples. I don’t care who it is. When my brother and his now wife first got pregnant, they were not married. I loved them together and knew they would make great parents, but I did not congratulate them on anything until after they got married. I will not support anything that continues to support the assumptions (and adds to our already soaring statistics) made about black women. I know you see this advertisement about 72% of out children being born out of wedlock…

          • Selena McQueen

            He doesn’t think his statement is ignorant because he refuse to see it as such but I completely agree with u. And who need his congrats anyway life moves on wether he congratulates u or not Smh

            • smh

              Why do you assume I am a man?

              • Selena McQueen

                Honestly I don’t care what u are

  • Taneesha Culture Clash Thomas

    Brandy’s baby hairs be laid!

  • clutchmypearls

    Brandy stayed lying. I remember when she lied about dating the guy from boyz to men. Monica came up the same time as her, she didn’t feel like she had to keep up that perfect image. I wonder why she felt she had to.

    • AllyCat

      She was 15/16 he was 22. Of course she lied or that fool would have been in jail. End of the Road indeed. Also Monica never had a perfect image. She came out sassy, head rolling, dating hood nigs. Brandy was sweet and cute and had a Barbie doll. She was Cinderella for Pete’s sake. She had WAY more to loose than Monica ever did. She had to have been 22 or 23 when she faked that marriage but she was still had an image and cared about being a role model.

      • Lisa

        Thank you. And she was in love with the dude from Boys to Men (yuck) so much so she wasn’t into Kobe when they went to the prom, bet she regrets that.

    • Jam

      Don’t forget about Flo Rida too!

  • Jackie Johnson

    It sounds like her Mom/manager was the one pulling the strings to her. Brandy just had to go with it .

  • Joan

    What does she mean back then it wasn’t acceptable? But back in 2002, a lot of people had kids outside wedlock in the US. It was never that big a deal! Or are we talking about a different planet here? I don’t know why she felt the need to lie unless she’s just a pathological liar who lie about the simplest things. It makes no sense to me.

    • JustSteph

      Well she was in the public eye and she was young. Just because many people had kids out of wedlock doesn’t mean its right and therefore should be praised. She had an image that she wanted to preserve. What is deemed ‘ok’ to some, maybe the opposite for others. However, I still like Brandy at the end of the day.

      • joan

        @disqus_K8DpJpwCOJ:disqus, so why the hell did she feel the need to lie about being married? That is such a major life event to lie about! So let me get this straight, it’s alright to lie that you are married just to carry on a facade and deceive your fans, but there it’s a taboo to have a child out of wedlock? Sound twisted to me! How is anyone ever gonna take her seriously or believe her ever again? Like someone said on the thread, this is not 1950s where such things were frowned upon. It was 2002, and like I said, it’s been happening. This is what happen when people pretend to be something they are not. They usually fall flat on their faces! P.S, BRANDY LIE ABOUT EVERYTHING. IT’S JUST WHAT SHE DOES!!! Ugh!!! I’m disgusted!!!!

        • JustSteph

          Perhaps in her family (and plenty others) having children out of wedlock is frowned upon. She had young fans and didn’t want to ruin her reputation. If she said “I’m pregnant and not married” she would have been seen as loose (maybe). She was young and scared. If you (or anyone else) was scarred bcause she lied about being married in order to hold some amount of dignity, than ya’ll are a little too invested in this woman.

        • Annette

          Even in 2002, at that time, I can’t remember another celeb who was a role model type, having to come out and say they were pregnant out of wedlock.

          Society was actually very different about this even in 2002 compared to now.

    • Renata Barnes

      Exactly. This was not 1850 or even 1950. I think that there was something more to her lie. I seem to recall that this guy was married or had gotten divorced or separated due to his relationship with BRande. She was the jump off who it seemed like, was about to be played. Then her reality special with her being pregnant, i think MTV or VH1 carried it, showed he a few days or weeks before the birht of her baby. I remember seeing the father and he seemed less than enthused or even involved. The next thing I remember hearing was that it was some kind of spiritual marriage. Her image? Well she left us all hangin’ when she broke out on “Moesha” so her shine was already a bit dulled. Haven’t heard much from her lately.

      • Lisa

        The something more to that lie was her momma as manager, her good girl image, and not being married. The press never did their homework on her story, like publishing the so called marriage license. Say what you want, but their momma made sure Brandy and Ray J stayed working. From Moesha to Cinderella to new music. She even threw Ray J in the mix, lol.

      • Lost Soul

        She plays on the show The Game.

    • blackrose

      We were all raised differently and in my home it was not something to be praised so I understand where she is coming from. Even at 36 if i was pregnant and not married that would be the hardest conversation I would have to have with my parents.
      in 2002 celebrities were not having kids out of wedlock in public like they are now. Today both black and white celebs are having kids and no plan of marriage.
      70 something percent of black children are born out of wedlock. Excuse her for not wanting to represent the stereotype

      • oscardgrouch

        I’m damn near 40..probably won’t/can’t have kids, but if I did, without being married, I wouldn’t want to have that convo either. LOL That is a No-No in my family as well and not something to be praised.

        • KjB

          I know exactly of what you talking about, I don’t think anyone in my family would be ok with any young lady having a child out of wedlock. Not to say it hasn’t been done, but NEVER condoned , especially the younger they are. Yes, it’s easier to lie about being married first, then conceiving a child than to simply be pregnant and have to explain the who, what and where to your family, fans and public at large. Not good to judge one’s decisions, unless we’ve walked in someone shoes. I understand totally Brandy’s position.

    • DoinMe

      This is a little different from another interview from Brandy awhile back. In that interview, she said that it was her mother her forced her to pretend she was married because of her image and too much money was on the line. Brandy said that she wanted to be honest about it because people would still accept her and see her as being more human and relatable, but her mother wasn’t haven’t it. They even tried to pair her with Kobe Bryant but he wasn’t into her. Again, another one of her mother’s made-up public image stunts. But when she continued to lie, it all blew up in her face.

  • Jam

    she also lied about having veneers, what else is good??

  • JHudson

    I always loved how Brandy carried herself. I always could relate to her when it comes to that “perfect” persona, others labeled you to be. It’s hard and i still commend her for being honest that she was scared about it. That takes guts.

  • dagr8

    I understand where she is coming from especially with her good girl image. But I may be the only person to not care if someone has a baby out of wedlock. What matters is whether the two parents can take care of the child and get along to raise a sane human being.

No thanks