About That Slave Joke: Leslie Jones And Why We Need To Allow Women The Space To Be Funny

103 comments
May 5, 2014 ‐ By Charing Ball

Leslie Jones II

Well it certainly seems that Leslie Jones, one of the first black female cast members on Saturday Night Live in so many years, has gone straight to work pissing people off for no real reason in particular.

People are mad that she told a truth. More specifically, they’re mad at what she had to say during SNL’s Weekend Update skit about Lupita Nyong’o being named the Most Beautiful woman in the world by People:

Jones: Hello Everybody, I want to come out here tonight and Congratulate Lupita on winning People’s most beautiful person and I agree she is very beautiful. But for me, I’m waiting for them to put out the most useful list, you know what I’m saying?  Cause that’s where I’m going to shine.

Collin: Most useful

Jones: That’s what I said, you delectable Caucasian. Let me ask you a question: If you walked in a club and you saw me and Lupita standing at the bar, who would you pick?

Collin: [ shrugs and stutters]: Well, I…

Jones [shrugs]: Yeah, I know. You would pick Lupita. But let me ask you this: If we were in the parking lot and three Crips is about to whup your a**, who you gonna pick then?

Collin: I would pick you.

Jones: You damn right you would! And that’s my point, the way we view black beauty has changed. Look at me, I’m single right now. But back in the slave days, I would have NEVER been single. I’m 6 feet. tall and I’m strong, Collin. STRONG! I mean look at me, I’m a Mandinga. 

Collin: Well Leslie, you’re not saying that you rather be a slave.

Jones: No Collin, that’s not what I’m saying. I do not want to be a slave. Hell, I don’t like working for you white people right now and y’all pay me. I’m just saying that back in the slave days, my love life would have been way better. Massa would have hooked me up with the best brother on the plantation. And every nine months I would be in the corner having a super baby. Every nine months, I would just be in the corner just popping them out, like: Shaq. Kobe. Lebron. Kimbo Slice. Sinbad. That’s what I’m saying. I would be the number one slave draft pick. All of the plantations would want me. I would be on television like LeBron announcing which plantation I was gonna go to .I would be like: ‘I would like to take my talents to South Carolina. I do believe that there will be lots of opportunities there for me.’ Now I can’t even get a brother to take me out for a cheap dinner. I mean, damn! Can a b***h get a beef bone!? CAN A B***H GET A BEEF BONE!?”

Listen, I laughed. And more importantly, I got the joke. But for those who didn’t get the joke, let me explain:

At the end of the day, who gives a crap what People, which for many moons has basked in the glow of Eurocentric beauty standards, thinks about Nyong’o, or any other black woman’s worth? These same colorstruck institutions have been defining our “usefulness” since our ancestors were chattel on bidding blocks. And it certainly appears that the tradition carries on based on how some folks are willing to weigh our beauty and self-worth in relation to how it twinkles in the white glare. This is a conversation, which some of the best women thinkers have been grappling with for a while (including this piece by Dr. Yaba Blay), so why not a comedienne?

There is also a bigger conversation to be had about the space in which we allow black women to be funny. On a personal note, I consider myself to be a funny person. I love laughing and I love making people laugh – the latter of which I am quite adept at doing. In fact, I have had several people suggest to me (in a sincere way) that I should pursue stand-up. Those comments usually come from folks, who know me and have become familiar with me and the concept of joking. Many other folks, however, don’t get it.

And no, it’s not the joke that is the problem, nor am I just overstating my wit. But I have actually seen and watched folks criticize a joke I made, and then turn right around to co-sign a similar joke made by a man. The crasser or bolder the joke I make, the more uptight many folks get. Even on social media, when I write an “LOL” after my joke, which as we know is the international symbol for “dude don’t take this satirical comment serious,” some will chime in and attempt to insert teachable moments and explain to me the error in my thinking, as if I was really serious. And the treatment gets more condescending, if not borderline violent, in person (I once had a dude curse me out because I made a quip about me walking a big dog while he walked a little dog).

As Jones humorously pointed out, Nyong’o is one hot lady. Sure, she may be dark skinned and African, which are two traits that normally and diametrically oppose the accepted Eurocentric standard of beauty, but she is also poised, petite and thin. And articulate too (which is a product of her highly educated background and affluent roots). But one thing Nyong’o is not, is funny. For all intents and purposes, her overwhelming acceptance and appreciation by the dominant culture follows the same trajectory of respectability and comfortability, which is often placed upon “appropriate” images of blacks in the media, by both blacks and non-black folks alike. Just two years ago, we had another dark-skinned woman land on the main stage. Her name was Gabourey Sidibe, and she too is beautiful. She also has one hell of a sense of humor. However, People and its list were not checking for her, nor were many black publications for that matter. And in fact, all anyone ever wants to do is talk about her weight.

Although she too is dark skinned, being as though she is six feet tall, thick in the waist and far from prim and proper, Jones too is outside this new “useful” face of black beauty. She also has a rough edge to her as well. She bounces around the stage and gets in people’s faces. She curses and barks really loudly too. That is okay as there are different ways to be feminine. However, that is not how we’ve been conditioned to think. We have been taught to believe that women and girls only aspire to be lady fem-bots. They’re not supposed to be animated or loud. They’re not supposed to have opinions or be contrarian. They can’t be satirical, goof-offs or act like a clown. And the closest that they can ever logically get to a punchline is by laughing at someone else, preferably a man’s joke.

So yeah, I would say that when it comes to black women, it does seem that not everyone is willing to get, or even consider the joke.

And I truly have a hard time believing that folks would be up-in-arms had this been a sketch by Dave Chappelle. Matter of fact, when Chappelle time-traveled back to antebellum South to hate on a slave master on his sketch comedy show, nobody cared. Nor do they care when tons of black male comedians do jokes about what role they might have played on the plantation had they been there. We accept that kind of humor readily from black men. We accept it because we know that comedy is often a mask for some deep-seeded pain and a space for men to work those issues out.

However, black women were there and a byproduct of it too. Our long transitioned elder grandmothers, aunts and female cousins had stories to tell too. And I’m willing to bet that some of those were humorous as well. So why can’t women descendants place themselves in the middle of plantation life and act out the various roles that they might have played? The field worker. The house slave. The breeder of big black bucks too.

There was a lot to deconstruct in Jones’ joke, particularly the use of the NBA draft to talk about the auction block and the ever-so-topical discussion around black people’s own internalized issues with loud and dark-skinned women (“Can a b***h get a beef bone?”) in general. Those topics are way too long and heavy to go into right now. However, I thought those were valued points, which Jones nailed in her satirical reaction to the People magazine declaration. And I think to deny her a space to articulate that bit of truth (and pain) is to engage in a level of erasure, for the sake of black folks’ respectability and the comfort of white folks.

I mean, what’s really offensive here? That at 6’0″, she would have likely been a breeder in a situation she has no choice in? Or the institution itself, which subjugated her into that position?

The last time this conversation came up about women in comedy, a Facebook friend reminded me that there is no such thing as a nice joke and a huge part of comedy is self-depreciation. And in many respects, he said, women are just not willing to be that vulnerable. This was his justification as to why it is largely believed that women are incapable of being funny. I resisted that notion then, but seeing how worked up folks are getting about Jones’ bit, he might have had a small point.

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  • Emma Greenfield

    But she aint lie, I hate working for white folks and they pay me good money.

  • jeremy

    All I know is that was some of the funniest ish I have heard in a long time. Ironic too, because this is the whitest SNL cast I can recall in my life…half the cast left after last year and I was really surprised to see new white guy after new white guy being added. But, I have to give Lorne credit because this has been a great season and the whole cast is terrific. I don’t think I’ve seen Leslie Jones before, but I’ll be looking for her because she is f’ing hilarious and that bit could go up against anything I’ve seen from Chappell, Murphy, Pryor, Kevin Hart, Bo Burnham, Aziz, or Bob Saggat for that matter. I hope she doesn’t back off or ease up, Jones has the potential to crash through that ceiling and make people ready for that kind of funny from a black woman. She has legendary potential from my brief glimpse of her schtick

  • jayjayy

    It’s beef **bowl**. Sorry, Madame Noire, I couldn’t help myself.. :S

  • Diana Johnson Pitt

    She was’nt funny to me but a joke is a joke,haha

  • Ms_Sunshine9898

    That was hilarious, y’all haters are crazy

    • Beauty In Truth

      Haters because coonery is in poor taste? Are you in middle school? Are you not able to understand the underlying ills and errors of this poorly executed joke? It was a self mockery in lines with newly accepted negro, self depriciating humor, i.e, eddie murphy, david chapelle who eventually left cc. Making fun of your race doesnt make whites think any better of you.

  • VVV

    So I am laughing hysterically. Shaq, Kobe..HA HA HA HA

  • http://batman-news.com Rhondayes

    Allow them the space to be funny. Now…that’s funny. She has all of the space she wants, but if she hasn’t found it yet, she never will.

  • http://batman-news.com Rhondayes

    The skit wasn’t funny and she knew it. She was struggling to complete it once she realized that there was mostly uncomfortable laughter coming at her. She has to find her moral compass and make her humore accordingly and not based on race assumptions.

    She needs to resign and not because of this skit, but because the only things she’s going to be asked to do is stereotypical humor and not all of it true. She’s going to be loud, abrasive, and rejecting. People are going to be put off by her and it could ruin her career. The white comedians are never given material that negatively stereotype white people. The humor is about straightaced high end people. It’s not all true, but who gives a damn. They’re white, so it must be true. Right? lol

  • oldschoolyrw52

    She was chosen specifically for her appearance. She IS the joke. They are laughing at her, not with her. It’s like “they” are saying, this is what

    the average Black woman looks like. NOT.

  • ariesdollface

    This was a minstrel show, pure & simple. Some people have always found minstrelsy funny; I never have.

    Second, as a woman I absolutely LOATH “jokes” that make light of the sexual exploitation of ANY woman. In her response to all the criticism, Jones took great pains to say that she never “said” the word rape. History and basic logic reveal that “breeding women” constituted rape.

    Finally, the idea that the only way that she, as a black woman, could have a “successful” relationship with a black man is through a white man’s coercion (FORCING him be with an otherwise undesirable black woman) is outrageously insulting to all black people.

    This “joke” is laden with problems! the fact that anyone who writes for or reads this site thinks that this is funny… well, that puts the current plight of black America in better perspective for me.

    Perhaps I’m being “too serious” but IMHO, black people have been laughing about incredibly serious issues (shucking & jiving) for a little too long. Jones is concerned about not having a black man? Perhaps she should make a “joke” that highlights the devastating repercussions of America’s prison industrial complex on the broader community.

    • Fraulein Maria

      You’re amazing.

    • Annalytical

      I agree wholeheartedly. I tried to post a similar comment, but it keep getting deleted. I’d hate to think it’s because my opinion differs so drastically from the author of this article.

  • Patricia

    I don’t understand why she would call herself a b****. Why use that word? I know this is just a skit, that the only problem I have with it when she call herself a b****.

  • The Owl

    This is a conversation, which some of the best women thinkers have been grappling with for a while (including this piece by Dr. Yaba Blay), so why not a comedienne?

    Why not a comedian? Because sarcasm does not flow very well for people who cannot make the relationship of what she is really talking about. I get it, but my white co-workers may not. The person would have had to of either experience or have the knowledge of that situation to make the relationship between what is really happening. Point and simple, if you are black, most likely you will get it because you are well versed in what went on in slavery and can make the link between what happened then is the same thing that is happening now. However, if you are white or a non-white, chances are you are not versed in this because you have not experienced what its like growing up black in America or the details of what happened in slavery. So the meaning is lost in translation and you take the “joke” at full face value and take it literally because you do not understand the sarcasm.

    TLDR
    “Jokes” such as these about slavery should not be told in a sarcastic or comedic way because the meaning can be lost in translation due to someone’s knowledge and culture thus doing more harm than good. It is best explained by people in detail such as with people like Dr. Yaba Blay so the audience can understand what the problem is and learn from the lesson rather than letting the audience to jump to conclusions or assume what the lesson is.

    If we expect people to respect slavery and want them to treat it with the same respect like the Jewish Holocaust, then we need to start respecting it that way ourselves. You won’t find Jews making jokes about how their relatives were prostituted out for Nazi Germany soldiers. You just won’t. We are destroying our own legacy which is why people don’t respect it.

    Just some food for thought.

  • FromUR2UB

    The problem I have with the jokes is the way they’re likely to surface again. You can laugh at her and say, “She’s so crazy!”. But, there are some certain weird people out there who process things differently. They will hear her joke as, “See? I told you black people were better off as slaves. Listen to them pining for the good ol’ days!” It’s not only infuriating, but just plain annoying that they’re always arguing for the “right” to call us ni**er. And, it’s not as though you can just ignore them and an issue wlll go away. They can’t be ignored because they’re like hungry dogs with a bone when they get on something. So, please! Don’t give them an excuse to start with THEIR jokes about slavery. I’m not ready for slavery to be funny.

  • Alexious Johnson

    I was amused….tis all

  • travestine

    I found the opening sketch a lot more offensive than what Leslie Jones had to say. To me, it implied that black women and black organizations are either for sale to, or can be bought off by, old rich white men as long as they throw around enough money. Adding the Dennis Rodman character was pointless, since he’s been a nutjob for decades, but I was really surprised that the black actors would even agree to take part in that sketch. I’ve also been really disappointed at how SNL has been making use of the black actress they made such a big deal about hiring – they clearly have no idea how to write for her. She’s hardly ever seen and when she is, her bits are stereotypical, barely a line or two and usually in the background. From the little I’ve seen, I think she’s probably a lot better than what she’s being given.

  • Fraulein Maria

    What is accomplished when we trivialize slavery? This isn’t only about her but I never find it funny when other comedians do it either. I have theory that the black race, as a whole, suffers from PTSD this supports it.

  • carmatogo

    She demonstrated a from of self deprecation humor. Many comedians use themselves as the ‘pun’ to get laughs. Kathy Griffin being on the celeb D list, Kevin Hart and his height, the list goes on. Personally, I did not find her joke funny. Being black, slavery jokes are just too easy but then again I’m sensitive about ANYONE attempting to make light out of slavery, especially to this extent. I also think about the racist white people with side stitches that find her more funny then we do. But with all that being said, if people found her funny, she did what she was suppose to do *shoulder shrug*

    • Aja

      Dave Chappelle had a big problem with that and couldn’t continue with his show even though he was offered a boat load of money. He saw that certain groups got malicious glee out of some of his skits and used them to reinforce their distorted racist views and stereotyping.

  • Courtney Banks

    There’s a reason why “white” institutions pick certain blacks for certain positions…. I’m just going to leave it at that.

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      You ain’t neva lied Courtney . . .

  • thatonegirl

    The sad part about this is this is a lot of black women’s reality. You can be the smartest, funniest, prettiest and most successful black woman but in this Kim Kardashian world it can be hard for us sometimes to win in the love department. I feel her I’m not mad.

    • Black Male Privilege

      But she’s none those descriptions you just said. What’s really sad she compared being forced to being with biggest black buck on the plantation with equivalent of having a black man to date. That’s called forcible rape in my book.

    • She Codes

      This is only true if you only date black men. If you open your options there is a world of available, decent mates available.

  • Luna

    I loved the skit! And i laughed so hard! See it as it is, jokes. If you get sensitive about this, you still need to overcome something or you’re not ready yet. She reminded me of a family member, sitting together and making black jokes. Not to degrade ourselves, but having fun in reflecting.

  • pumpkinj

    First, people complained that there were no black women on the cast. ok. As a black woman, I can appreciate that. I have been a fan of SNL since the Eddie Murphy days, and I agree that there haven’t been many of us on there. So Lorne Micheals arranges a casting call, strictly for black women. ok, done….now, this talented comedienne is criticized for being honest. Could it have been because she is a black woman, instead of a black man (black men have been doing jokes WORSE than this one for YEARS)?? Sounds like a case of “damned if you do, damned if you don’t”, so I don’t see why SNL would even acknowledge the issue. Either laugh and enjoy or simply DON’T WATCH IT. And of course, there is always a 3rd option; just #STFU. You can never satisfy all the people, all of the time, so why try? Chile please.

    • GUEST1

      Exactly! A serious case! Black make comedians can get away with anything in black comedy. Black Women Nawl! Dave Chappell did a race draft and these ninjas are still laughing. It was a joke and lmao at it! I’m also tired of us speaking for other groups of ppl. “Jewish ppl would never” umm yeah you clearly did no research before that false statement was typed.Since when do you care about the plight of Jewish ppl and the Holocaust. So I’ll add a bye Felicia to your child please! Lol

      • pumpkinj

        High Five Guest1! Up top! lol You are clearly a 5 percenter like myself. We have to understand that sheep will be sheep, nothing we can do about it. let them “baaaaa” on with their resentment towards truth. lol

  • brian

    she does not have a man cause she is not attractive and has a manly persona. Has nothing to o with her being black,thats just excuse ugly women that don’t know how to act around a man use. And she isn’t very funny

  • BBULJ

    it was not funny and no one watches SNL, do they?

    • pumpkinj

      Clearly they do, since it’s been on the air since 1975. Let’s see how long shows like “Love that Girl” and “The Rickey Smiley Show” last. Feel free to marinate on that one. :)

      • Guest

        just gotta be an a$$hole, right?

  • moniqhar

    I don’t see any thing to be upset about other than the skit it self (delivery) wasn’t funny.

  • Angel89

    The joke wasn’t really making fun of slavery people…she was making fun of the relationships, or lack there of, between brown men & women (I hate saying black lol) of today & during those times…& it’s very accurate and funny lol

  • guest

    I’m not one for comparing Black folks to whites, Asians, Hispanics, or any other cultural/racial group, but I’m going to here. You will never, I mean NEVER, find Jewish folks joking, laughing, making fun of the Holocaust. They take their past seriously, reverently, and have a ‘we will never forget’ mentality about it. Whatever differences or disagreements they may have among themselves as a people, on THAT issue, they stand together. It would be nice if Black folks could have the same reverence for our history, and not treat it like a joke. To this very day, we still suffer from the effects of slavery — in numerous ways. Personally, I don’t think we’ll ever really overcome the effects of slavery totally and completely, but we sure as he// shouldn’t be joking about it. Black folks . . . smh . . .

    • charingb

      Springtime for Hitler for two hundred, Alex…seriously, the Producers is one of the biggest Broadway musicals around and Mel Brooks got filthy rich doing that very thing you’re talking about.

      • SailorMoon

        The Producers was a parody of a parody. The play/movie wasn’t about Hitler, it was about two producers trying to turn a profit by creating a show no one would want to go to.
        Just like Hollywood Shuffle, it wasn’t about black coons running around Hollywood it was parodying the racist Hollywood system.

        • charingb

          Um, okay. A parody of a parody. So you are saying that the Producers was a joke? Just like the Leslie Jones joke?

    • SMH

      Um that’s straight up not true have you seen Curb your Enthusiasm? Larry David constantly makes jokes about his culture up to and including Holocaust jokes. smh

      • charingb

        Adding on, Jerry Sienfeld, making out during Schindler’s List. Or Sasha Cohen, Throw Jews Down the Well skit…

      • guest

        Nope, haven’t seen “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” so if Jewish comedians are making fun of the Holocaust, I stand corrected. But my point remains — Jewish people have a respect and a reverence for their past that binds and unites them. Black folks?? No such thing …

    • CedarHill

      I think I get what your saying. Even though EVERYTHING she said was true, she told it in front “company”. But jewish comedians make fun of their horror as well. She’s speaking about her experience as a darker skinned sister, we cannot deny her that. The bigger issue is how some black men & women relate to each other.

  • Gabie Aldrich

    I LOVE Her! She’s hilarious!

  • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

    I’m offended by her hair not her humor. Why not have a nicely done natural style and not this I stuck my finger in a light socket and went with it look? Did they run out of time during her blow out?

    • Gabie Aldrich

      Come on now! Leslie is hilarious! and talented and you went straight to the “WTF happened to her hair route”.

      • folamix

        Seriously, that’s like folks dissing the female gymnast about her hair……smh

        • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

          That isn’t anywhere CLOSE to comparable. Gabbie was on TV doing gymnastics. Her hair looked NORMAL for a gymnast. Pulled back and secured with hair clips. This woman’s hair looks unflattering and like it was purposely done this way to make her look crazy. Y’all better get hip to the underlining shade being thrown here. That’s not a natural style, and I for damn sure do not see any black women I know rocking their hair straightened and sticking straight up on top of their head.

          • folamix

            Oh yes it is. Rather than focusing on what she said, people go straight for the hair. In Gabby’s case, rather than focusing on her accomplishment, people went straight for the hair.

            • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

              To be honest, the combination of her self deprecating “comedy” skit and her unattractive and unflattering hairstyle I stand by my stance that it was done purposefully that way to make her look as crazy and ‘comical’ and also unattractive as possible. There are plenty of straight styles that would have actually flattered her its a pity the hired hair professionals (you know SNL employs people specifically do do hair and makeup right?) didn’t see fit to do her in one of those styles.

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  • ladyday429

    WOW! Craaazy girl, Good 4 her pulling this skit off. You have 2 be able 2 deliver & that she did. U dont have 2 like it. Lets be real theres some truth 2 it.

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  • Doug White

    It has always been stunning to me how few people ‘get it’ about societal standards and how worthless they are. Thank you for ‘getting it’ and for articulating it so well. Great article!

  • greentea516

    I found the humor in it and got it. Ebony did a piece with an opposite viewpoint to Ball’s basically and it was bashing Jones more than understanding her SMH

  • SouthernBelle

    Thank you so much for this post! That’s the problem when folks find one line and take it out of context. You could almost say this was here Aint I a Woman speech or Aint I Pretty too

  • brazen

    That was funny. twitter is starting to now sound like a forgotten spacetrip. what happened now?? man, lol

  • Black Male Privilege

    Wow people on here cosigning this? It’s wasn’t funny point blank period.

    • carmatogo

      I agree. Yes, black people can joke about black issues, but she took it to the next level.

    • 1Val

      Co-signed.

    • ariesdollface

      “Wow people on here cosigning this?”

      ikr. that fact alone saddens me

      • Black Male Privilege

        Wow why was my comment deleted I didn’t attack anyone. If you as author can’t deal with the amount likes I might have because it disagrees with your primary premise then you need to get tougher skin.

        • Annalytical

          I keep getting deleted as well. This censorship of differing opinions is ridiculous.

        • ariesdollface

          i can’t believe they deleted your comment!!!! wow! wait…let me check for mine, lol

  • Taneesha Culture Clash Thomas

    i love this chic…been a fan of her comedy for years

    • Gabie Aldrich

      Me too!

  • http://therealmacoya.tumblr.com/ Coya

    Yes this is funny. I was watching her doing stand-up one time and she used the same joke with a lady in the audience. People need to lighten up. Not everything is a race issue. We’re a diversified world growing more and more as the years go by.

    Some things can be said that weren’t meant to be offensive but are taken as such. Sometimes people can use better judgement with their decisions and what they say, but who wants to walk around on eggshells all day. Especially being a comedian it’s just all about how you look at it.

    That’s why I try to be as careful as I can when it comes to what I say. People can be so quick to take offense when it’s not really necessary. And then she’s black at that…. C’MON NOW..lol

  • aguy

    That sh&t was funny . Yes , i laughed too , out loud, might i add. But once again , we’re taking about what entertainers do ………they entertain . Either watch it or dont. She has what it takes to be a cast member, let her show her talents.If it becomes a weekly incident of the “race bashing” …THEN start calling and emailing NBC.

  • MonicaT

    HILARIOUS!!!! Yes this was funny lighten up its a joke! I think she is so funny. I’ve sent her comedy in the past!

    • KIR12

      Honestly, I did laugh at the Crips and Shaq part when I saw it. But I disagree and didn’t laugh at her reasoning for being man-less. Point #1 She was never viewed as a black beauty!!! Not before slavery, during slavery nor after slavery. Some women are just not attractive ladies. Secondly, She’s 6 foot, unfeminine, overweight, has a bad body, busted grille, loud, ghetto, masculine and aggressive and she’s in her mid to late 30’s but somehow blames black men as the reason she doesn’t have a man. The author then blames complexion as the main reason she doesn’t have a man. Really…… wow!?!! You all need to forget what Black Feminist have been telling you. It’s a lie. Black Women get to decide what men they want and are attracted to. Black Women don’t also get to decide what black men want and are not attracted to in a woman.

      Leslie Jones just has too many negatives. Complexion is not even close to the main reason she doesn’t have a man. Funny thing my guess is even with all of those negatives she probably could have gotten and probably had a BLACK MAN at certain points during her late teens and early 20’s. When a black woman has as many negatives as she has and is also over 35 it’s a wrap as far having interest from men. Her courting time has passed. Leslie and black women like her might find a husband but it’s a needle in a haystack at point. Don’t wait until your 30’s to look for a quality man with a good job to be your husband unless are you’re a straight banger and even then it’s risky.

      • blah

        u missed the point

        • ZeroFuxGiven

          Of course he missed the point, every conversation he’s ever had on any blog is anti-black woman. click on his name and all of his postings come up. He’s a troll, ignore him.

          • KIR12

            Translation, I disagree with your comment so I’ll deflect.

            • ZeroFuxGiven

              You can disagree all you want. By the way, thanks for proving my point.

        • KIR12

          Why don’t you tell me what I missed.

      • She Codes

        Uh… you do realize that it was a made up skit, right? You don’t know if she ‘has a man’ or is even straight for that matter in real life.

        • KIR12

          Did you read her Twitter rant explaining the skit? Of course not.

      • Guest

        are you married to a woman? if not, then please STFU about women’s prospects of marriage..thank you.

        • KIR12

          Black women prospects? Today 31 percent of African American women by their early forties have never married as compared to only 9 percent of White, 11 percent of Asian, and 12 percent of Latino women in the same age group. Those are child bearing years! In the 1950’s, the majority of black women married in their twenties and had a higher marriage percentage than white women.

          Men and women are NOT equal. Black women have a short period of time when they have the most options for picking a eligible husband. 21 to lower 30’s. My guess is 80 to 90% of ALL black women unmarried after 35 never marry. My guess is 80 to 90% of black women over 200+ pounds never marry regardless of her age.

          • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

            No boo. over 90% of black women WILL have married in their lifetime . . . . .

            • KIR12

              You know that’s not true. Stop counting black women over 55 who got married in their 20’s 30 years ago. lol You all look at what I write as hating on black women. I’m just trying to warn a lot of these YOUNG black girls that the Black Feminist fantasy of men chasing after them in the mid to late 30’s is a lie. I see young girls working low pay, low skill jobs thinking they can wait until 30 to start looking for a husband. A woman is one bad relationship in her 30’s from waking up 35 alone with limited quality men options.

              The percentage of black women over 40 who get married is extremely low for a number of reasons. Limited available men, appearance, kids, weight, poverty, attitude stuck in their ways ect…

              • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

                May I encourage you to take a STATS class sometime in-between your continuous admonishments of black women? I don’t need to “stop counting” anyone. Seeing as 90% of black women will have married in their lifetime I cannot see why you persist with your argument.

                • KIR12

                  I wish that were true.

                  It’s called commonsense. Black women don’t get married at the same rate as they did 30 years ago. Simply, black women are not marrying at the rate in their 20’s and black women over 40 are not marrying at an increased rate to make up the difference. Commonsense shows that’s going to leave more black women UNmarried. You might disagree with my approach but why lie?

                  • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

                    Who’s lying? as yours are guesstimates at best and do not refute the stats I provided. But sure I’ll let you run with your agenda that black women are not getting married. Cool. Neither are black men . . .

                    • KIR12

                      census()gov/prod/2011pubs/p70-125.pdf

                      Never married for 55 and OLDER is currently 13%. But here’s what you have to understand. Women 55 and OLDER marriage rates in 2009 are not going to BE THE SAME as women 55 and OLDER marriage rates in 2029. Why because the women 55 an OLDER in 2009 were in their 20’s pre 1979 and married more and at a younger age. Most were in there 20’s in 70’s, 60’s and 50’s. Hopefully you understand that. This is why I’m WARNING these young black girls about what’s going on.

                      You can see a dramatic increase 24% in never married black women by just going down to black women 50 to 54 for 2009. Highly unlikely many of these never married women find a husband.

                    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

                      So in other words I’m right?

                    • KIR12

                      You’re right if the woman is 55 or older! lol If she’s 35 or younger you should be looking at the 35 to 39 group. The rates compared to Whites, Latinos and Asians ARE SHOCKING. I’ve seen articles stating black women marry later. There’s zero stats to back that up. Let’s be honest there’s a reason a lot of these black women are never married; Poverty/Welfare/Low skill low pay job, Overweight, unattractive, kids, unfeminine, promiscuous, attitude ect… add on to that these black women are now over 35 and to think those percentages are going to change drastically is self denial. Fast forward My guess is in 2029 this report is going cause the alarms I’m sounding right now. Those 35 year old women will be 55 or older and my guess is their never married rate is going to be about 35%. Add to that black women who divorce and not remarry and it looks even worst. This only makes sense for people who believe you can’t have productive communities without MEN IN THE HOMES.

                      Never married
                      Black women 39%
                      Hispanic women 15%
                      White women 13%
                      Asian Women 10%

                    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

                      Would you mind throwing up the STATS for men, black men, getting married? Seeing as most people marry people within their race, and in most cultures it is the men who do the asking it would seem that black women are tragically not married because black men don’t want to. But its not surprising when you throw up the employment rates in different ethnicities Black men are the least employed and therefore the least likely to get married. Oh and the breakdown of the incarceration rates would be appreciated too. But we can of course blame it all on black women and their bad attitudes. LOL

          • http://batman-news.com Rhondayes

            You still missed the point of the article. However, let’s go with the numbers you provided.

            There are a total of 40 Million Black people in America. 50% are Women. I won’t discount any of them. You say 1/3rd have never been married that would total appr 6-7 Million Black women. wow.
            As for white women there are…hell I’ll be conservative and say 100 million and you provided me with 9% that’s just over 9 million. Shut up. lol…

            btw, don’t get me started on the number of obese white women there are. that number is larger than the total number of ALL BLACKS in the UNITED STATES.

            • KIR12

              I hope you’re not college educated. You really think 9% is worst and will have more of a negative effect on a community than 30%? Too stupid for me to even waist another second replying.

              • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

                *waste* :)

          • Ms_Sunshine9898

            I’m tall, about 6 feet, and I”m well over 200lbs. I’m happily married to a great man . . .

            • KIR12

              Don’t hold me to that most women over 200 are not 6 ft tall plus you’re attractive and take care of yourself. You look like a slightly older Jordan Sparks. You don’t look much over 35. I’m sure you’ll find someone if you’re not already married.

          • Guest

            answer the question-ARE YOU MARRIED TO A WOMAN?? Is she in the age range that you specified? If you and those who think like you are not marrying these ‘young girls’, why are you talking about their marriage prospects after they get a certain age?? You’re not doing your part and you wanna talk? Again STFU about it. Thanks

            • KIR12

              wow scared to show your real name? smh No not married and no kids.

      • Orgullosa De Ser

        uh…em hemm! But who died and appointed you god? Have a seat…explain the bevy of beauties out there without a man then god!

        • KIR12

          I didn’t say I was God. I just gave an opinion just like everyone else.

          My explanation, they held their cards to long. Those beauties had tons of black men chasing them in their teens and twenties. YOUNG attractive black women have to fight black men off with a stick. lol

          • Orgullosa De Ser

            you need prayers…

      • Laurie

        You clearly missed the whole point of this piece, so I won’t even do you the honour..

        • KIR12

          Seems like a lot of other people also missed it. lol You might want to read her twitter rant explaining HER reasoning.

    • folamix

      I think she put a comical turn on a sad fact and got her digs in about the NBA as well

    • 1Val

      I’ve seen her comedy also. Its sad that she really is a one joke comedienne lamenting being single. At least she knows that she is ugly and resembles a man. If she had new material perhaps she would be funny.