Update: D.L. Hughley Apologizes For Comments Made About Columbus Short’s Wife

136 comments
April 30, 2014 ‐ By Jazmine Denise Rogers
Source: WENN

Source: WENN

Update 4:29 pm ET: D.L. Hughley has offered an apology for the insensitive comments made about the domestic violence allegations brought against “Scandal” actor Columbus Short by estranged wife, Tanee McCall-Short. His statement reads:

“Last week during an after-show segment of my radio show, The DL Hughley Show, I unintentionally offended some people.

In regards to Columbus Short’s legal issues, I jumped to a conclusion and blamed Tanee McCall-Short; and I’m sorry. My intent was not to quiet victims.
When I did speak of the topic on air, I repeatedly emphasized then, and as I do now, that anyone who is convicted of domestic violence, should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law; and that is what I believe.

Today, as always, the phone lines to The DL Hughley Show will be open. We’ll address this topic with the DL Question of the Day and will discuss it throughout the show today from 3pm – 7pm ET.”

Are you satisfied with his statement?



 

Yesterday, we told you about some pretty outrageous comments made by comedian and actor D.L. Hughley regarding the real-life scandal surrounding fellow actor Columbus Short and his estranged wife, Tanee. Apparently D.L. isn’t convinced that Tanee is being truthful in her domestic violence allegations made against Columbus. In case you missed it, here’s some of what he had to say:

“The star of one of the hottest dramas in the country, chokes the f*ck out of his wife? That doesn’t ever happen. I don’t think it happened first off. Like the time Warren Sapp was getting ready to do the Super Bowl and some broad said that he raped her. There are just as many examples of women lying on men in the middle of divorce proceedings to get what they want, as there are men who actually do anything. My point is if he did what she’s alleging he did, she could still get all that she’s going to have and not bring it up now, when it damages his market value that she’s going to be impacted by. If he loses that job nobody’s living in Calabasas anymore.”

Since the airing of D.L.’s comments, a Change.org petition organized by writer Kirsten West Savali has been launched, urging the radio personality to apologize. According to Kirsten, D.L.’s insenitive words have endangered “the lives of Black women who may be victims of domestic violence by encouraging them to remain silent.” An excerpt from the petition reads:

“We must hold D.L. Hughley and Reach Media’s Black America Web — which through the headline, “Why Columbus Short’s Wife Should Keep Her Mouth Shut,” lends credence to Hughley’s malicious and dangerous remarks — to a much higher standard. One that doesn’t mock the pain of Black women, assumes that we are liars or further endangers us by creating an environment in which our lived experiences with domestic violence are ignored and ridiculed while our dead bodies pile up in cemeteries across the nation.

We are demanding that D.L. Hughley publicly apologize for endangering the lives of Black women who may be victims of domestic violence by encouraging victims to remain silent for monetary gain. We are demanding that he apologize for victim-blaming and perpetuating a culture of violence against Black women.

We are requesting that several blocks of programming be dedicated to Black women, domestic violence and what can be done in the Black community to address this very real issue.

We are requesting that Hughley’s show be suspended until such actions are taken.

If such actions are not taken, we will call on “The D.L. Hughley Show” sponsors to no longer financially support the dehumanization of Black women and the dismissal of domestic violence, one of the most important issues in the Black community.”

You can check out and sign the petition here. Thoughts?

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  • jpowers55

    When will anyone ask Donald Sterling for an apology? I’ll wait.

    • kiki j

      We want his apology? Nope don’t want anything from not even his charity that everyone is refusing. Should’nt compare every situation. I think the Sterling situation is being handled correctly. He dug himself an early.

  • lashonte

    These comments are ridiculous!!! Women do lie. They lie in the courts, media, to their friends, and family and on and on. Men are often mischaracterized by such claims. Get it together women. These claims are not absolute and in fact are often embellished by women.

    • Fraulein Maria

      Your ideology is ridiculous and disgusting. This is why a lot of victims don’t come forward b/c of archaic belief that most women lie about these things. I bet you probably think in all instances of assault the woman was at fault.

      • jpowers55

        So a woman has never lied about anything like that? Ever?

  • flameforjustice

    Never did care for D.L. now I know why.

  • flameforjustice

    Looks like old D.L. is just another prejudiced woman hater who thinks all women are liars and money grabbers. Wonder if he learned that from his watching his own dear mother when she interacted with males in her life including him.

  • flameforjustice

    Just another ignorant black male sounding off on something without all the facts.

  • Yolanda Hinton

    I never really like his act…lately all I hear from him is him degrading black women as if he is not married to one and have daughters…look for ok m to at any minute dib rice his wife and find a white one…pay attention

    • Greg Maxson

      Where did he mention race, did I miss something?

  • lockstress

    wanted

  • lockstress

    Yup…if we wante to hear from an azzhole we would have farted!
    SHut up forever DL with your ignorant arse comments.
    Don’t take your hatred of your momma out on every woman.

    • tusher

      I just hollered in the middle of my office on that one! LMAO!

  • Patricia

    I don’t even listen to DL Hughley. I wish he would think before he speaks. It seems like he never does that.

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  • 9Boots

    Y’all already know I signed this petition! I couldn’t wait to do it!

  • Sydvixen

    Like D.L said to me a few months ago..” if I cared what you thought, I would be following you” and with that said Mr.Ugly correction Ughley.. I see you retracted That statement… I told you … Some things aren’t meant to be said publicly.. but Now it matters? Umm Humm

  • FromUR2UB

    He looks like somebody caught him and beat him in the eyes.

    • lovechild

      Lol xD

  • TrillProphecies93

    It seems that 2014 is the year black men seem to feel they are above black women! Let’s not forget a black women brought you into the world! DL goes in on black women on a daily! Only weak brothers do such things. They go on talk shows, blogs, internet boards, and make movies about how much they hate their own women! I’m shocked more people don’t find it sickening! I don’t understand where all the self hate is coming from, spewing hate about black women is not going to make them white or grant them acceptance. Its just gonna cause white to laugh at them all call them fools , they don’t disrespect their own women for black women do they? White men don’t put black women on their albums, write songs about them, go on media and complain about white women to say black women are any other race of women are better…just black men…!

    • scandalous7

      the worst are black male comedians

    • mmmdot

      Well that’s where it comes from… internalized racism and self hate. And the only people that many black men feel they can take it out on is a group that is supposedly even lower then the social rung then THEY are, which is black women. I’ve heard black men constantly make sanctimonious comments and degrading “jokes” over black women wearing weaves while ignoring the fact that the white/ non-black women they put up on a pedestal often use hair extensions and hair pieces. Not to mention white women often dying their hair to the point that they literally can’t remember what their natural hair color is–is that “natural”? I have also seen black men say that just because they have more interracial relationships/marriages and are racially fetisized for having big black dxcks, that they and every other racial group are more desirable then black women. It’s like they don’t know or care that they are being objectified and that black women have hundreds of years of experience with that and are more cautious about dating interracially. And it’s like these dumb fxcks don’t realize that other races of men *DO* hit on us. Hell, I got hit on by a white pharmacist going to pick up a prescription. But I’m not a DUDE, so I tend to think shxt through with the *big head* first.

      I don’t know wtf is going with some of these black men today but they need to stop this shxt and realize that black women *ALWAYS* freaking hold them down. If they were subjected to an instance of racism, black women will be the first to defend them, but what about *US*? How come they don’t put other black men who publicly degrade black women in check? They need to deprogram themselves from whatever America is telling them about black women. I don’t actually give a fxck if black men date interracially and I know many other black women who don’t either–I just want them to stop *PUBLICLY* dumping all over black women to justify their attraction, fetish, whatever for white or non-black women. They especially need to stop dissing brown and dark brown black women (like Lil Wayne’s gremlin behind and A$AP Rocky who are both dark THEMSELVES. SMH.) I will always stand up for the black community and black people, but I cannot and WILL not tolerate racialized misogyny from black men.

  • TrillProphecies93

    We should demand a apology from all of these sell out black entertainers! Self hate is never pretty and when you use your status to spread it makes things even worse. DL like the countless others behind him have an extreme dislike for black women and its sickening. I don’t believe his apology at all but hey…this rodent always shows exactly how he feels we should know its not genuine.

  • bkenya

    This is an attack on black women and on ANY woman who is or will be in the future of victim of domestic violence. He is a public figure, who is spreading a message of hate and doubt, so that women who are in danger will not report it or may not be believed, because of him. While, he may not influence everyone, one death or women in fear of her life is too much.

  • sha

    It is his opinion and she did not like it, so what! He is not that dam influential that it will now cause a spiralling affect of women not reporting violent acts because of DL. Really, yeah lets just stop it. HIs point as stated “My point is if he did what she’s alleging he did, she could still get all that she’s going to have and not bring it up now, when it damages his market value that she’s going to be impacted by. If he loses that job nobody’s living in Calabasas anymore.” In other words if it was about more money during divorce shut the hell up because what you are doing is cutting yourself short. NOW, that is everyone’s choice as to what is most important. Apparently, it was important for her to ruin his career as she should have known something like this will do. Of course it was all his doing but you know what I mean before the – you are blaming her for his actions – repsonses.

  • Moira

    Take him off the air! If they can fire Imus over the nappy ho comment, then DL needs the boot as well. We go after non black people for comments like this all the time.. DL needs to be fired

  • blogdiz

    Watch Black women fight this fight alone .Ironically just a few days. ago Donald
    Sterling made some racist remarks about black men (some of them quite wealthy I
    might add ) and the outcry and support of well thinking whites and the black
    community was (including BW ) was given , expected and even taken for granted

    Interestingly when ever BW find themselves under attack by misogynists or have any issues regarding racism, sexism or colorism to deal with they are ALONE No white feminist will lean in / out or sideways no white liberal will be outraged the same BM that BW were defending tooth and nail only a day ago have gone about their business unperturbed by this and other daily denigration of BW .In fact I fully expect many BM will be the foot soldiers in the assault with their all too familiar words used to silence BW voices …gold digger , bitter low self esteem , thirsty angry overly sensitive etc

    None of us know what is taking pace in the Shorts marriage including Hughley , but what
    we do know domestic violence is no joke thousands of women are maimed and killed by their partner and many of then threatened to do so before . How any well thinking person can condone Hughleys insults are beyond me …. This is just so tiring

  • Sherl D Glover

    Mr Hughley has freedom of speech, and if thats how he feels then let him say that, I’t not promoting any thing against black women to keep quite, most women are making false accusations to get what they want. People can’t say what the feel these days.

    • blogdiz

      Donald Sterling also has freedom of speech People can say whatever they want but there are consequences

    • NIk

      Most women are making it up huh? Did you just pull that lie out of nowhere or did you copy it from somewhere? DId you know most cases of abuse, both sexual and physical, go unreported, largely because people like you will always find a reason to cast shame upon the victims of these crimes and create a hostile environment for recovery. People can say whatever they want these days and days in the past, but that doesn’t make what they say immune to judgement or critique.

    • CTROCK

      He promoted exactly what you just said! – that most women are lying. The truth is Most Abused women don’t report what happens to them,either because they are ashamed of it or they think they can change the man and it will get better. It never does.

  • Guest

    Who wants a forced apology? He obviously meant the BS he was spewing. How about we just hit him where it hurts and not give him any more shine. No more listeners, viewers, site hits, etc.

  • Nita

    Let me find that petition so I can sign it!

  • Taneesha Culture Clash Thomas

    i surely will sign it! not that his apology will make any difference what he said he meant…he’s an azz!

    • lovechild

      Yeah I guess it would be somewhat satisfying to make his go before the public to address his fawkery. Personally I want his pockets to hurt more than his pride. :-)

  • lovechild

    Meh, I would sign if it were a petition to get rid of his lousy radio broadcast. Since his show is for public consumption then we as a public have a say in what “product” we would like to consume. I have not one f___ to give about an apology, he said what he meant and meant what he said, and he has made hateful remarks targeting black women time and time again. I am all for freedom of speech but I also have a right to not have hate speech leveled at me for being black and a woman. The Jewish community has done it and the gay community has too, black women need to do the same, because this ish is getting out of hand.

    • 1Val

      If there isn’t a petition we need to create one. This is my issue with Steve Harvey’s of our community who love to run their mouths policing black women’s behaviors while permitting black men to run amok. Its just like racism is only an issue that most blacks not white people see. Black male sexism is only an issue that black women see and protest while black men remain eerily silent.

      • lovechild

        I agree, I have not heard a peep from any men with a public platform checking DL for his commentary. Black women are left to fend for themselves. I would like to know how to start an online petition.

        • 1Val

          Are any black men with a public platform talking about abduction of Nigerian girls? DL Hughley seems mild compare to hundreds of black girls forced into human trafficking.

          • lovechild

            Nope, none that I know of, in their eyes black women and girls are invisible until they are chastising or criticizing.

            • 1Val

              Its pitiful isn’t it? Sigh!

      • mmmdot

        “Steve Harvey’s of our community who love to run their mouths policing black women’s behaviors while permitting black men to run amok.” WHEW GIRL YES! The perfect description of the type of sanctimonious, uneducated, and paternalistic black man that literally tap-dances on my last nerve.

  • soisaid

    DL should take that petition and wipe his azz with it… you want disrespect of women, turn on your local radio station or video stations and listen to todays rappers disrespect women till your ears fall off.

    • NIk

      But why should he wipe anything it? Because there’s worse? Because that’s a really low bar, or are you saying something else?

    • mmmdot

      I don’t know why the fxck you think we should only concentrate on ONE particular kind of black male misogyny and sexism, but we’re capable of multi-tasking. Kay? Thanks for the hateful…oops I mean “helpful” suggestion.

  • Lorena Clarisa Songcayawon

    You do not need to apologize for speaking truth…I agree with him! No one can insure or secure these allegations if they weren’t present. He deserves to be seen innocent until proven otherwise!

    • B.

      That’s not what he said at all. He in fact said the wife is guilty of lying and Columbus is innocent. Had he said, “we should wait to hear all the facts, before making any conclusions,” that would have been fair. Instead, this is what he said, and it’s irresponsible, considering he has no idea if what happened is true or not. “The star of one of the hottest dramas in the country, chokes the f*ck out of his wife? That doesn’t ever happen. I don’t think it happened first off”

    • Fraulein Maria

      Yes, because sexual assaults and domestic violence cases occur with a lot of witnesses around. The good-looking hero of your favorite tv drama is utterly incapable of such behavior, amirite? Victim shaming at its finest.

    • blogdiz

      Then say that !saying Columbus deserves the right to be innocent before guilty I can roll with it instead Hughley basically accused Mrs Short of lying and said she should keep her mouth shut ..How is this the truth ?????….SMH

    • janelle

      Exactly – he needs to be proven guilty…so since he hasn’t been proven as either innocent OR guilty, DL Hughley shouldn’t be making statements that imply his wife is lying. DL doesn’t know what the truth is no more than any of us do, so he shouldn’t assume that his wife is making up any part of her accusations.

  • Raven

    Why does EVERYONE need an apology? This really concerns me. I think that everyone should be able to say whatever they want and be man or woman enough to deal with the backlash. I do NOT agree with someone being punished for saying something. That is a form of censorship. Asking for this man’s livelihood to be interrupted is ridiculous.

    • Raven

      We need to really check ourselves and appreciate all the rights we have. We are giving “them” way too much ammunition to curb our First Amendment rights.

      • Val

        What does 1st Amendment Rights have to do with this? Just because you’re free to say something doesn’t mean there won’t be a price to pay for saying it.

        • Raven

          That’s what I said. When we say something we should be men and women enough to deal with people not liking it. What I am saying is that people should not be punished for excising their rights and saying what they want. The only exception to this is if someone is speaking within the scope of their profession. If DL was a college professor and said these things while being interviewed as a “college professor” and not a regular person then, yes, there should be some repercussions. He is public figure speaking about another public’s situation. Why should he have his show cancelled? That’s what the First Amendment has to do with it. American popular culture has gotten into the rhythm of shaming people for the things they say and then calling for them to be “punished” by an authority figure. That is censorship and it’s a slippery slope.

  • linda

    He’s no different than Donald Sterling

  • kale is king

    damn an apology from that angry, misogynistic troll. it wouldn’t be sincere anyhow. i would petition the sponsors of his show. how many times should he be given a platform to rant and spout ignorance about black women? he’s disgusting.

  • mmmdot

    This little troll went on national TV agreed with that racist white man Don Imus that black women are “nappy headed hos”. He has a history of making misogynistic comments about black women and he now he is using his radio platform to actively discourage black women from reporting DV to law enforcement when they feel their lives or their safety is in danger. All Columbus Short’s wife did was file a police report and restraining order. *TMZ* found the records and publicized it. Even when Hughley found this out he still didn’t change his argument that she needed to “shut the fxck up”. In fact, he said she was *overreacting* and that her life truly wasn’t in danger, so there was no need to file a report. He also claimed that either women lie about abuse or that if they pick a guy who turns out to be abusive it their fault and they shouldn’t complain because they wanted a “thug”. SMH. Throughout the entire show he was literally finding ways to blame the victims of domestic violence for being abused and making it clear that if they report their abusers it could lead to them and their children being in dire financial straights. But what he fails to understand that 50% of your husband assets aren’t going to be of any use if you are DEAD. He tried any rationalization he could think of to discourage and silence women from speaking out and trying to hold the men who abused them legally and criminally liable for DV. He SHOULD be fired, and he NEEDS to work out his misogyny issues on a damn therapy couch instead of taking it out on black women who are victims of domestic violence.

  • Rosemary Davis

    D.L.Hugley is an idiot who has made a living by insulting others the only diffrence between him and Donald Sterling is that his comments is inflicted on women of his own race.If Columbus Short was innocent of the accuzations made by his wife he would still have his job and I’m certain the Police Dept have complaints on file from his wife.

  • Lboogie

    DL should have kept his mouth closed! He disrespected Columbus AND his wife! Guess that CNN show didn’t work out, so he’s resulting to antics to stay relevant. He should worry about his own wife.

  • Kay

    I don’t think D.L. Was telling her or any other woman to be quiet when it comes to domestic abuse. I believe he was just stating that he didn’t believe that short’s wife is being forthcoming with everything that happened. And there are many women who lie about such allegations out of spite just like there are ones who are sincere in their reports of abuse. I don’t think that man should have to apologize for his opinion of what he thinks took place. Doesn’t make it true but he was definitely not telling women to just shut up and take it

    • Briit

      So, D.L. saying that it never happen wasn’t his way of saying for her to shut-up? He basically said she was lying and that Columbus didn’t do anything to her, not that she wasn’t telling to whole story.

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      If she lied then she’s been lying for years. There are other domestic incident reports between these two long before Short became famous. IJS

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      And how many is “many” lie? And by what way did you come with this guesstimate of “many”

      • mmmdot

        THANK YOU! Let’s see the answer to *that* nebulous number.

  • chaka1

    DL is the worst. The mess that comes out his mouth is reprehensible, idiotic, and immature. I can’t understand how he keeps getting (and losing) jobs.

    • B.

      I just want to add irresponsible. Him saying that it “never happens” is just irresponsible. Because he has a good job, he can’t ever lose control? What an asinine statement. So, I guess every athlete and entertainer who’s ever been accused or convicted of domestic abuse is really innocent. He sounds like an absolute idiot. Does he know Columbus? Is he tight with him? Does he know the ins and outs of his relationship? Some people are better served by shutting the cuf up.

  • Bri

    *there*

  • Bri

    It’s very dangerous to make remarks like he made, although we do not know what exactly is going on behind the scenes. However, their are a lot of victims of domestic violence. A lot of women who are keeping silent about their abuse out of fear and shame. We must not shun the victim, however we must not judge a situation without also knowing all the facts. I was not there so I can’t judge.

  • Pingback: Petition Launched Demanding Apology From D.L. Hughley For Comments Made About Columbus Short’s Wife - Beauty Tips Around The World | Beauty Tips Around The World

  • Val

    Apology? Why would we want a forced apology from him. How about he loses his job. That would be a real consequence. And, a lesson to others who might get on their public soapbox to show their hate of Black women.

    • Blackhawk

      Why would you want this black man to lose his job?? I swear instead of black women having our backs they are worst than the white man.

      • Renee

        So black women should co-sign everything a black man does, even to her own detriment? I would never stand by a black man who doesn’t respect black women.

      • mmmdot

        Because black “men” like this will go on national TV and agree with “the white man” that black women are “nappy headed ho’s”. Look up how he agreed with that racist Don Imus and then shut it up with your fake a$$ victim complex. Black “men” who hate black women like Hughley, do more damage to the black community then anyone else. I can’t stand people who point the finger at someone reacting to hateful bigot rather then pointing their finger at the source of the problem.

      • C’mon son

        Get your head out of the clouds. After this black man just called a black woman out her name and victim blamed and shamed, why would any black woman, or anyone in his/her right mind for that matter, have his back? This isn’t a universal strike on black men, just D.L Hughley. Chill.

      • Mr. T

        I agree Blackhawk. Women like Val should shut up go watch Scandal or Basketball Wives. They’re the first to want a persons JOB over an opinion thats different from theirs. **watch her come back with how educated or how much of a single mom she is** I’m so sick of these new age black women who think dumber quicker but believe they are so smart. Just loud & wrong.

        • TrillProphecies93

          Your just another angry koon like he is. I’m sick of you no good koon Uncle Tom black men who think your better than black women. Thats why every other race laughs at you cause they know your weak and disloyal! You guys are the laughing stocks of other races. Your spineless and good for nothing but crying and complaining when your asked to take some responsibility! Go run back to your white women since your so fed up! All these hilarious stories about you Uncle Tom’s being called a nigg@ in your face by these white women is pure hilarious! Thats what you want to be treated like the sl-@ves you are! New age black men = sl@ves!

          • Annalytical

            I can’t help but notice your constant usage of the word ko*n.
            Perhaps no one has ever pointed this out to you, so please allow me: it is an EXTREMELY offensive and derogatory term for Black people. I find your unrelenting use of the word very offensive.

          • mmmdot

            “All these hilarious stories about you Uncle Tom’s being called a nigg@ in your face by these white women is pure hilarious!” LMAO, goddamn. Are the black men you’re talking about *dating* these white women? Or are these just random racist white chicks calling them the n word?

        • 1Val

          DL Hughley is just loud and wrong.

        • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

          If their opinion is damaging to black women and they choose to broadcast their opinion on a NATIONAL forum and not the barbershop, yeah I have a real problem supporting that. Hughley has some real venom for black women its clear. So I choose to allow him his hate and not support him on any level from here on out. No need to keep spitting in my face and then want me to pay you for the pleasure. No thanks!

      • TrillProphecies93

        Cause most of you could care less about what happens to black women. Your all up under white women so much its crazy. I think its a little sad how brothers seem to think we gotta help you out and support you when as a whole you don’t do the same! DL is a koon and you are too for that stupid @ss comment you just made! Why would a black man call another black women terrible names like this without knowing whats going on? Why would most black men want to put black women down instead of uplifting them? Why are black men the only disloyal race to their women? He should loose his job nobody is gonna stand for supporting you koons any more!

      • 1Val

        DL Hughley should lose his jobs because he insults his employer i.e. black women. The majority of DL Hughley listeners and ticket purchasers to his concerts are black women. What job can any non-celebrity have that disrespects their boss/employer? If DL Hughley’s boss were the “white man” that he talked smack about his arse would have been fired and blacklisted
        too.

        FYI, the only black women who owe you “the black man” loyalty are women in your immediate family. All other black women you must EARN their respect!

      • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

        So in your opinion Hughley had Short’s wife’s back when he was calling her b*tch and every hateful word under the sun on a public forum? That to you is loyalty? I can tell you right now if a white radio host would have talked that sh*t he would have been promptly canned and rightfully so.

        How about Columbus Short? Did he “have his wife’s back” when he held a knife to her throat and threatened to kill her? How about the numerous times he whipped her a**? How’s that for having her back? Boy bye if you are going to excuse blatant disrespectful and criminal behavior because they have the same color d*ck as you then you d*mn right a black woman would be STUPID to have the back of such black men.

        *drops mic*

        • mmmdot

          YES! Thank you!

      • LeeLee

        How in the world is this a case of black women not having a black man’s back? Why isn’t it a case of a black man not standing up for black women and holding men who are abusive accountable for their behavior? I swear, let a black woman say anything other than “BLACK MEN ARE KINGS” and black men get to rending their garments and gnashing their teeth. SMH

    • Keyona Ifyousayso Johnson

      I don’t think it is an attack on black women. Everything ppl do is not racial. Smh. Now as far as an apology I don’t feel he should be forced to do that neither. I see where some of the sensitive ppl can get up in their feelings about the statement. But let’s all remember he is a comedian and he makes fun of high profile ppl all the time.

      • mmmdot

        What do you mean “racial”? Do you not know that black men can be sexist and misogynistic to black women?

      • Val

        Yeah, well, I never hear him going off and talking ish about White women, so.

        And, when someone attacks Black women someone always comes along saying we’re being too sensitive when we stand up for ourselves.

        • TrillProphecies93

          You have to ignore koons! Any black man that cuts down black women all the time is nothing more but a new age Uncle Tom and house nigg@! They wouldn’t dare speak ill of a white women but lets talk about a black women even though I’m sure his mother is black! Its sickening and sad what most brothers have become!

          • 1Val

            DL Highley will not speak about white women because he KNOWS his arse will be out of a job.

      • bkenya

        an attack on black women and on ANY woman who is or will be in the future of victim of domestic violence. He is a public figure, who is spreading a message of hate and doubt, so that women who are in danger will not report it or will not be believed, because of him.

      • Britt

        But he didn’t make fun of a celebrity, he made fun and said disrespectful things about a celebrity wife. Columbus Short wife is not famous and stay out of the spotlight. He didn’t verbal attack Columbus, he attack his wife!

    • mmmdot

      EXACTLY. I agree 100%, these black male comedians and celebrities who seem to *hate* black women need to start facing serious consequences for it. Then maybe they’ll start addressing their issues with misogyny on a therapist’s couch instead of taking it out on black women.

      • TrillProphecies93

        Yes! Seems like you can’t find a black male these days that doesn’t have issues with black women! Especially the celebrities, they fuel the fire for these basic black men to grow b@lls and talk about us on daily like its cute. Just makes them look like d@mn fools to other races! Its a sad and sorry state black men have fallen to!

        • 1Val

          Its because there are very little to no consequences for publicly denigrating black women. For example, years ago Wendy Williams and Kirstie Alley were contestants on DTWS. Comedian George Lope had a late night talk show where he mocked Williams and Alley. He said Williams looked like a man and Alley was a fat pig. Sh*t hit the fan when he berated Alley. Things got so bad for ole George he was forced to give Kirstie Alley an on air apology. But he had talked about Wendy Williams in the same monologue. Shortly, after Alley dust up George’s show was canceled.

      • 1Val

        Perhaps we as black women should start a petition to remove DL Hughley off the air. Its not his first attack on black women. If society has no tolerance for racist celebrities e.g. Donald Sterling, Paula Deen, etc.. Why should sexist male celebrities be any different. C. Delores Tucker was on to something back in the day. Quite frankly, I haven’t any interest in hearing an apology from DL Hughley who has a public platform to spew his hatred of black women.

        • mmmdot

          I agree. I would definitely sign it in a minute. I am tired of misogynistic black men like Hughley using their public platforms to PUBLICLY broadcast their disdain and hatred for black women. This has got to stop and they need to take their color struck, self hating a$$es to therapy.

    • SMH

      They should fire him and give his “spot” as the go-to black “host” to Wanda Sykes. She’s funny and “others” like her.

    • blackrose

      Isnt it is job to tell inappropriate jokes? He is a comedian. If you do not like his comments, change the channel. He is on the radio to be funny. I do not find it funny but do not think he should lose his job for his opinion or doing his act

      • Val

        Okay then, explain what was funny about what he said regarding Short’s wife?

      • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

        There’s funny and there’s spewing venom. Please pull one line out of his rant that was anywhere near funny?

    • Sheree

      You don’t know DL, and I’m not saying this to be snark. He NEVER apologizes for offensive things he says. Remember when Don Imus called the Rutgers team nappy headed ho’s and DL agreed with him. He never apologized because he meant what he said. I was listening to his station when he announced his apology today, you can tell he genuinly felt bad after the new details came out. If he didn’t feel bad, he wouldn’t apologize for it, that’s how he is.

  • Trisha_B

    He said his opinion & shouldn’t be forced to change it. I may not agree w/ what he said or his delivery, but he has a right to say w.e he wants. his forced apology gonna be bullshxt & not real. Who wants a fake apology? The only person that should want an apology is Shorts wife. If she’s not asking for it then why are others demanding it?

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      He does have the right to say what he wants. And if he felt that strongly about it he should have stood by it. Too bad his job hinges on popularity and sponsors both of which took a hit when he talked that hateful BS. So he could have fallen on his sword and been unemployed or he could have his publicist whip up that standard apology and live to offend another day.

  • Coya

    The sad thing is, this is not something that can always be proven. You have a lot of women that do like and make false accusations. It makes it hard for the men and women. For the men that are falsely accused, arrested and some even sent to prison over lies. And then for the women that really are abused and are looked at as liars and expected to be quiet about what has happened to them.

    It’s one of those things that I hope we will able to solve so innocent men won’t go to jail and victims will be able to be taken seriously about their abuse.

    • SMH

      Did you know that an non-imprisoned American man is more likely to report a rape than for a woman to be shown to have lied about a reported rape? The specter of a woman lying has come to dominate discussions of assault, but it isn’t even that common. Talking about how women always lie about assault is basically the gendered equivalent of saying black people are exaggerating about racism and playing the race card.

      • B.

        SO incredibly well said. The fact is so many cases of domestic abuse and/or rape go unreported, so the numbers are even higher than statistics show. I absolutely believe the number of people claiming to be beaten and or raped, when they weren’t, is very small. That is not a common practice, certainly nowhere near the number of women actually being abused and raped. But, because someone hears of a case, every now and then, they think it’s a regular thing. GREAT analogy, because it is very much the gender equivalent of the scenario you gave. And yes, someone will cry racism when race is not the issue, but by no means does that one person lying mean that racism doesn’t occur on a regular basis, across the world.

        • lovechild

          I agree! Both domestic violence and sexual assault are underreported, false reports are the exception to the rule.

      • mmmdot

        EXACTLY.

      • Coya

        Notice what I said. I did not say that women ALWAYS lie and it actually does happen more often than you think. Just because you don’t always hear about it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. A man in Florida was just released after serving 3 years in jail for falsely being accused of rape. And it doesn’t take a lot of women making false claims before it taints the women that really are abused.

        That’s why it’s so hard to convict a rapist in the first place. They have to dig all in the woman’s past to make sure she ISN’T LYING. So in the end it negatively affects the women and the men. Don’t take what I say out of context and then twist it around. Reread the comment and then maybe you will see and understand exactly what I meant.

        • Guest

          We all know it exists, we just don’t think it’s some great, big exponential number of women running around falsely accusing men of assault. And the numbers are neither here nor there. The POINT is that D.L. Hughley called this woman out of her name for no good reason. You can have doubts about a public case without name-calling and victim-shaming/blaming.

          • Coya

            And if that’s the case then no one should have even responded to my comment because MY POINT was something completely different. And if the numbers are neither her nor there then why even respond to this comment? If you’re not responding in regards to a comment that I’ve made then don’t bring up points that are not in reference to something I’ve brought up.

            I’m not trying to nit pick with numbers but when people respond in regards to a comment for numbers, then that will given. You may not hear about it but if were to be displayed nationally every-time it happened I think everyone would be surprised about how often it DOES happen.

            But that’s not even my point nor the original point I was trying to make. Disregarding what anyone else’s point is or what they think it should be…..

            MY POINT, from the original comment posted was based on the fact of how difficult it is to know if accusations are true. Not saying that they are never or majority of the time not true. SOME NOT ALL accusations can be exaggerated out of anger and hurt. These type of accusations are not black and white. There are a lot of different issues involved. On top of that initial difficulty, you have women that have lied in the past about such accusations that make it even more difficult.

            Therefore, situations like these should be handled delicately because you don’t want to accuse an innocent man and ruin his career. And you also don’t want to accuse a victim of slander/fraud or hinder them from speaking out about their abuse.

            I don’t feel that D.L. Hughley should have spoken out about this because of the situation. But he has a right to his opinion. He was wrong for slandering or accusing Short’s wife for something he doesn’t know the reality of.

            My initial statement was generalized and not necessarily in regards to Columbus Short, his wife or D.L. Hughley.

            • Guest

              Well, this is a public forum so people will respond. I’m sorry if responding and challenging your view offends you. My only point in regards to your initial post was the TONE almost made it seem like D.L. Hughley’s stance was somehow justified because you kind of led with “a lot of women lie and make false accusations”. Maybe that was not your reason for making that statement, but I’m sure you can see how it could be construed as making an excuse for what he said. I think most of us here agree with all of the other talking points about wanting to avoid accusing an innocent man, not wanting to slander or deter a victim from speaking out, etc. I just will never feel it’s OK to jump the gun (on either side) without all of the information, and D.L. Hughley definitely seems to have picked a side (subjective as it may be).

              • Coya

                I Have No Problem With People Responding, That’s Why I Comment On These Blogs. I’m Not Offended By Differing Opinions, I Know Everyone Doesn’t Think The Same. And You’re Right Maybe I Insinuated That I Was Agreeing With D.L. By Not Being More Thorough With My Statement.

                What Annoyed Me Was The Attack For A Word That Wasn’t Nearly As Important Or Relevant In My Statement . But What Can You Expect When You’re Conversing On A Blog? I Understand Where The Confusion Set In. It Seems Like Everyone Is On The Same Page Regarding This. No Bad Feelings On My End.

        • LeeLee

          I don’t think anyone would argue that it doesn’t exist but that’s not the point here. The point is DL was wrong to assume that the woman was lying. Unless he is familiar with Short’s intimate affairs he had no business speculating that she was lying and making a connection between his income and her DL-imposed mandate to keep quiet. If what she alleges is true we’re talking about her *life* here. She wouldn’t see a dime from grave.

          • Coya

            I agree like I’ve stated before that DL was out of place. If I wanted to initially state that I would have. But that was not my point and it doesn’t have to be my point. That’s why I stated I was annoyed because people tried to make a point on something I already knew.

            My point was something completely different but since everyone made it “their point” to have a problem with “my point” then I had to explain “my point” when in the end everyone’s point was the same.

            Everyone is entitled to their opinion and what they feel, but this is a public forum and everyone is entitled to post their opinion. Whether people feel like it has something to do with the point or not is besides “the point.”

            Because I make a statement about something deeper than the face value, it’s not the point? If people would have taken the time to thoroughly read and understand “my point” before trying to make “their point” it would have saved a lot of confusion down the line.

            My point doesn’t have to be what everyone else thinks or feels the point is or should be. Yes DL was out of place I pretty much figured everyone knew that, that’s why I didn’t initially post it in my comment. But oh well it comes with commenting and invoking conversation from a keyboard. Confusion will happen eventually.

            • LeeLee

              I didn’t say anything had to be your point and speaking only for myself I wouldn’t deny you or anyone else the right to express their opinion. I figured everybody knows that it can be difficult to prove whether or not certain allegations are true, so *I* didn’t post that. Frankly, for me your comment wasn’t deep. It was just a comment, on a pubic board, that I responded to. It’s kinda what happens on posting boards. I’m not going to go in circles because you don’t like people not liking what you said.

              • Coya

                It has nothing to do with disliking someone else’s opinion or disagreeing with them. It’s all about how that person presents their opinion. But you can’t help but expect people to jump to their own conclusions on public blogs.

                • Latisha Washington

                  And what does your opinion have to do with Columbus Short abusing his wife? People lie about a lot of things. Yes, there are women who lie about being raped or abused, but there are even more women who are honest about it and even more who don’t even report it, particularly in the black community. When people make the type of statements you’ve just made, it gives others the impression that most black women lie about being abuse…and this is NOT the case whatsoever. Your comments are not helping Coya.

    • Val

      Do you have any actual numbers to prove that “a lot of women lie”? What’s a lot? I really don’t think women lying about domestic abuse is at epidemic levels.

      • Coya

        Re-read my comment before you’re so quick to click reply. I said I should fault myself for using the word “a lot” and a lot is an opinionated word anyways. 1, 2, 14, 20 could be a lot to me. Do the research and see what you come up with and see if that’s not a lot to you. If not, that’s you.

        I’m entitled to an opinion and if you don’t agree that’s life. I’m not wrong or faulted because I think something different. A lot of kids to one person could be 2 but to the next 6 could be a lot. People are making a case about something that really is irrelevant.

        My comment and opinion is much more in substance than a mere word. If you’re going to reply at least find something that’s more important to initiate conversation about. But hey, you’re entitled to your opinion. And in your opinion you felt a “word” was something worth responding for. I can’t blame you for that.

        Don’t allow opinionated words to be all that you have to bring to the table. You’re not the first person to dismiss my entire comment because of a word, an opinionated one at that. #IJS

        • janelle

          All she did was ask you a question – no where did she say you weren’t entitled to your opinion or wrong for what you felt. She was asking you what YOUR opinion of “a lot” is. That’s all. The tone of your response to her sounds very defensive when all she did was ask you about any research you’ve done. If the answer is “I didn’t research it.” Then that’s the answer. If the answer does involve some research, then there’s your answer. If 10% of cases is considered “a lot” to you, then you can say that. Seems strange that you’d take issue with someone asking you for your opinion by responding that you’re entitled to it without actually giving it.

          • Coya

            The tone of her response/question seemed like more of an attack than an actual question. She didn’t just ask what’s your opinion or what does a lot mean to you. And if that’s the case it’s fine, I just feel more people are paying attention to something that is irrelevant to me, especially when I’ve already explained maybe it was poor word choice to use.

            I don’t have an issue with people that have a different opinion or question my opinion, it’s just the way people address that opinion. I’m commenting on a blog to initiate and invoke conversation so I have no problem with people not agreeing with me.

            What also bothers me is that people are focusing on a word and disregarding an entire statement that would give them the answers they’re seeking if they weren’t so quick to jump off and hit reply.

            I usually type long responses so it wouldn’t surprise me if she didn’t even read the entire comment and just took from it what she assumed to be true and then replied. I would just rather people read my whole comment and see where I’m coming from and then respond before attacking me because of what they think I mean.

            But obviously by her merely mentioning the word “a lot” which is an opinionated word, proves that she either didn’t or just completely ignored the rest of my comment. That’s what I had a problem with.

            If you’re questioning my comment or it doesn’t seem like it makes sense to you there are better ways to ask me that. If you read my initial comment and then see her response you will see how it easy for someone to take offense to that, especially when they’re misinterpreting what the comment is stating.

    • eblock

      Thats a Fact.

    • blogdiz

      Yes maybe some women may lie however None of us know if the allegations are true or not including Hughley for him to call this woman out her name in such a disgraceful manner is indefensible

      • Coya

        Exactly and I agree. People didn’t even know or cared to ask where I stood regarding Hughley whom I didn’t even mention in my original comment before attacking me for an opinionated word.

        I’m not commenting in regards to women that are raped and abused and don’t speak up because of shame, embarrassment and fear. And by not commenting in regards to that percentage was not my way of ignoring or disregarding the many women that are actually abused/raped and don’t report it. I know that the rates of assaults/rapes that go unreported is sky high compared to the women that lie but some people took my statements and completely went left. It get’s very annoying.

        But I agree he didn’t have a right to call the woman out of her name and accuse her of lying. It’s definitely not something that people on the outside looking in should comment on, especially when they don’t know the full story from first hand experience. (Not second hand or third hand.)

    • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

      “You have a lot of women that do lie” Really? When you say “a lot” do you mean that out of the reported domestic violence cases “a lot” of them are lies? Please elaborate on this. If there were a 1000 reported cases last year how many out of that 1000 would have to be a lie for you to consider that “a lot” 2? or 200? And do you really believe there are “a lot” of women who are lying on men to get them in trouble? Where do you source that information from? Personal experience, meaning you’ve witnessed “a lot” of women making up stories to get men falsely arrested? Or you’ve read a STAT somewhere that backs up your opinion? Or do you just have a hard time believing that as many women get abused as is reported?

      All of the STATs I’ve seen about domestic violence indicatethat it is waaaaay under reported by the victims and usually when they do speak up it was after several unreported altercations.

      • Coya

        Please read my other comments for your answer this has already been discussed. Just because I didn’t mention the women that are abused and don’t report it doesn’t mean I’m disregarding them.

        Although my comment was not in depth because I didn’t think people would misconstrue it, I’m not saying that the women that do lie and make false accusations outnumber the women that don’t report their abuse.

        My initial point was pretty much that…people should be careful to not comment on these types of issues because as a result of the women that do lie and have lied, it is easy for people to place the blame on the woman and assume she is lying.

        Both men and women are negatively affected by those type of scenarios. The women that lie send innocent men to jail while making it harder for women that “have actually been abused” to be believed and taken seriously.

        I’m not stating that it outnumbers the women that don’t report their abuse. However those type of cases have been tainted because of that reason.

        I was taking the blog and offering a response to that scenario as a whole not to their particular situation. It’s hard for any of those types of cases to be proven because there usually are no other witnesses other than the 2.

        And D.L. Hughley assumed she was lying why?

        That’s what I was responding to. And notice that I also briefly mentioned both the women that are not taken seriously or are viewed as liars and the innocent men. I did not mention just innocent men. People reading this comment are jumping to conclusions not because of my lack of thoroughness but because of their assumptions that I’m neglecting to mention or somehow defending D.L’s actions when I actually did neither.

        No one will or ever know if a woman is telling the truth about her abuse unless they were actually there to witness it. And in that, D.L. shouldn’t have spoken out against their relationship because he was not there to witness it. But I know why he did, because he felt that she was lying because of the cases that are proven of women that actually do lie.

        So to end this and serve it all up in a nice big bow, what I was saying….

        The women that do lie and make false accusations against men, make it hard for the women that really are abused to be believed and taken seriously and the innocent men that are sent to jail. #i’mdone

        • http://www.yourtango.com/users/cheekee-baby cheekee baby

          My question of your “a lot” statement was just to gain an understanding of what you are basing that statement off of. Even one liar is too many that point we can agree on. but your argument seems to imply that there is an overwhelming abuse of domestic violence laws that are getting innocent men sent up the creek left and right. Or that we can’t “really” know if its true. That is why we have a court of law.

          That is why there is a judicial system in place that obtains things, like facts, evidence, and testimony. I would wager that out of the false allegations reported that the percentage of men actually convicted is probably very low.

          • Coya

            That may be but I’m saying the number of the men that are actually convicted because of false accusations has been enough to damage the perception that women that have been abused receive.

            And although we have a court of law by the time the case is even finished an innocent man’s reputation will already have been tainted even if he was found innocent.

            My point was that the false accusations make it hard for women and men both. It was my fault for using the word “a lot” but I still believe that there are many cases. I’ve seen quite a few myself (and that’s what I was basing my statement off of, the ones I’ve heard of in the news myself i.e. Brian Banks, Stanley Rice, Cheydrick Britt) And I know some haven’t been brought to national attention but that wasn’t the point I was initially trying to make anyways.

            • mmmdot

              “The number of the men that are actually convicted because of false accusations has been enough to damage the perception that women that have been abused receive.” No it really hasn’t. The reason why people are TAUGHT to be skeptical about claims of domestic violence is because we live in a sexist society. Not too long ago it wasn’t even really illegal for men to beat and rxpe their own wives–and since these acts HAVE become illegal and taken somewhat more seriously by the criminal justice system, men and (unfortunately) many women like to voice complete disbelief and “skepticism”, and about any claim of domestic violence as well a victim blaming. It’s really absurd when the MAJORITY of domestic abuse claims against men have been found to be substantiated. This is why I ALWAYS err on the side of believing women when they say they have been abused–because they literally have more then enough people automatically voicing “skepticism” and resorting to victim blaming tactics.

              Two studies have examined rates of substantiated allegations of domestic violence in the context of family law proceedings, and they find that allegations are substantiated in 63 to 74 percent of cases (Shaffer and Bala, 2003; Johnston et al., 2005). The remainder are unsubstantiated – where either there is insufficient information to support substantiation or where there is a determination that the allegation is false.

              A Canadian study of family law cases in which written decisions were produced over a three-year period identified 42 recorded cases of spousal abuse alleged against men. Seventy-four percent of these were substantiated. Only two cases of spousal abuse alleged against women were identified, one of which was substantiated (Shaffer and Bala, 2003).

              A US study drew on documentary records describing 120 divorced families referred for child custody evaluations and custody counselling, collected over 1989 to 2002 from family courts within San Francisco Bay Area counties. Multiple allegations of child abuse, neglect, and family violence were raised in the majority of cases. Allegations were more likely to be substantiated against men than against women (67 versus 55 percent). In other words, counter to some popular perceptions, men rather than women were more likely to make allegations of domestic violence (and substance abuse) in family law proceedings which were not substantiated.

              http://www.xyonline dot net/content/fact-sheet-2-myth-women%E2%80%99s-false-accusations-domestic-violence-and-misuse-protection-orders

              • Coya

                Living in a sexist society definitely plays a part as well but the women that “do lie or make false accusations” don’t make it any better.

                You’re entitled to feel your way and I’m entitled to feel mine. There are plenty of factors that we could go on and on about that play a part in why people are so quick to deem an abused woman a liar. The stats are not always exactly accurate because there are unreported women abused by men and men abused by women. My pastor was in an abusive relationship with his ex-wife that he has given a testimony about.

                Just because I make a comment on what is real to me or how I feel doesn’t mean that I want or need an essay with statistical info. Doesn’t change what’s real to me and what I have personally seen. Not everything is always going to be reported in statistics. It’s just a sheet with “some proofs” so people can feel the need to throw it in the air to make people feel what they’re stating or believe is exact fact so their opinion can be easier to accept. It’s used in law to give an estimate of what the truth is but it’s not the exact truth.

                What states are those percentages from, what are the women to men ages ratio? Are women that are older or younger more likely to be abused? Are the couples more likely to be married or dating? Do the women/men come from single parent homes or married homes? There are many stipulations that go into statistics and they will never be completely accurate. We could go on all day about percentages and statistics but it will never be exactly accurate and cannot be taken as such.

                Your point to bring up the statistics were for what? To prove that my opinion wasn’t accurate which can’t be proven with or without statistics? Because I didn’t lay out statistical info means that I don’t know what I’m talking about or that my comments don’t have substance? Where does my pastor fit into those statistics? Or any other men or children that are actually in fact abused by women?

                See how this can easily be taken completely left from a statement that really has nothing to do with statistics?

                The cases that have proven that women have lied may not be the only factor in the reason why people are quick to deem a woman a liar but it definitely is one of them. That was my point.

            • mmmdot

              1.”Living in a sexist society definitely plays a part as well but the women that “do lie or make false accusations” don’t make it any better.You’re entitled to feel your way and I’m entitled to feel mine.
              There are plenty of factors that we could go on and on about that play a part in why people are so quick to deem an abused woman a liar.”

              I never said you weren’t entitled to your opinion, but you’re ignoring the *SOCIETAL and CULTURAL* milieu that your very COMMON opinion about abuse has come out of. On top of that, you’re sharing your opinion on a public forum full of women— and we have all heard that “But some women *DO* lie about abuse” excuse before. Hell, many
              of us, (including myself) may have even espoused it ourselves, until we knew better. But often when people do some RESEARCH on the issue and realize that there aren’t more false reports of sexual and domestic abuse then there are false reports of other kinds of crime, they start wondering *WHY* women who claimed to have suffered sexual and physical assault get such a vitriolic response of near universal skepticism, disbelief, and victim-blaming. I notice that you use a lot of personal stories as a rationale to back up your opinion, but it seems like you often don’t TRULY examine the WIDER societal, cultural, and historical issues that influence what you are seeing and hearing with the friends, family members, acquaintances around you. I mean it’s nice that you acknowledge that there is sexism—but it’s pretty much useless to acknowledge the existence of sexism and misogyny if you can’t acknowledge how PERVASIVE and OMNIPRESENT sexism and misogyny are.

              2. “The stats are not always exactly accurate because there are unreported women abused by men and men abused by women. My pastor was in an abusive relationship with his ex-wife that he has given a testimony about.”

              This is what the New York State Office for the Prevention of Domestic
              Violence has to say about that common belief:

              The Myth: The number of female abusers only seems small, because most male victims of domestic abuse are too ashamed to contact law enforcement or domestic violence services.

              The Reality: There is little evidence that male victims report abuse
              significantly less than women do. In 2008, for instance, an estimated 72% of Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) against males was reported to police, vs. only 49% of IPV against females. When men don’t report an incident to police, they usually say it’s because they see it as a private or personal matter, not that they feel ashamed and

              embarrassed. Some male victims want to protect the partner who assaulted them–just like female victims do.

              There are very few heterosexual men whose self-esteem is destroyed by abuse, who give up school and career progress, who are forced into unwanted sex, or who flee for their lives.

              Male domestic violence victims who come to law enforcement attention are more likely to be future suspects for domestic violence than female victims. One study found that:

              -41% of male victims of domestic violence were identified by police as the SUSPECTED PERPETRATORS in the next subsequent incident of domestic violence, compared with only 26.3% female victims.

              -Only 26% of male suspected perpetrators were later identified as victims in the next subsequent incident of domestic violence, vs. 44% of female suspected perpetrators.

              Similarly, male victims of intimate partner violence homicide are much more likely than female victims of partner homicide to have previously abused their eventual killers.Example? According to the Homicide Research Working Group, among African-American women who killed their male partner, almost 80% had a history of being abused.

              On 4/29/2014 The Guardian website discussed how the issue dual arrests in U.S. domestic-violence cases favor abusive men to the detriment of battered women:

              According to Sue Osthoff of the National Clearinghouse for the Defense of Battered Women (NCDBW), who has worked with numerous women charged with crimes related to THEIR OWN BATTERING, the problem is twofold: law enforcement personnel are not being adequately trained to deal with the complexities of domestic violence cases, and batterers are getting increasingly savvy at USING THE SYSTEM AGAINST the women they abuse.

              3. “What states are those percentages from, what are the women to men ages ratio? Are women that are older or younger more likely to be abused? Are the couples more likely to be married or dating? Do the women/men come from single parent homes or married
              homes? There are many stipulations that go into statistics and they will never be completely accurate. We could go on all day about percentages and statistics but it will never be exactly accurate and cannot be taken as such.”

              Well one study was in Canada (Shaffer and Bala, 2003) and the other was in the U.S. in California (Johnston et al., 2005). According to the CDC, women between the ages of 18 and 34 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence. According to the FBI, in 1980, 69% of all intimate homicides were committed by a spouse. By 2008, a nearly equal proportion was committed by a boyfriend or girlfriend (49% vs. 47% by a spouse). I’m not sure who’s coming from a single parent home or not but it might be better for some couples to split up rather then stay married. It is suggested that the decline in men being murdered by intimate partners from 1976 to 2002–the DOJ says it fell 81% for black men vs 56% for white men–is evidence that abused women have developed legitimate and less socially stigmatizing ways to leave their relationships (e.g., divorce, shelters, police, and courts). Responsive violence in response to male violence is the largest single category of violence used by women. Many battered women are afraid for their lives when they kill their abusers.

              4.”Your point to bring up the statistics were for what? To prove that my opinion wasn’t accurate which can’t be proven with or without statistics? Because I didn’t lay out statistical info means that I don’t know what I’m talking about or that my comments don’t have substance? Where does my pastor fit into those statistics? Or any other men or children that are actually in fact abused by women?

              The cases that have proven that women have lied may not be the only factor in the reason why people are quick to deem a woman a liar but it definitely is one of them. That was my point.”

              I don’t just use statistics by themselves because that would be absurd. I *always* apply statistics in an appropriate *societal context* so that I can get to the ROOT CAUSE/S of a particular issue and see how it INFLUENCES people, systems, institutions, etc.from there. To do otherwise would be using statistics as thought they come out of a cultural vacuum. ‘Moving upstream’ is a concept that means addressing the root causes of inequality and finding solutions to the problems they cause before they develop. RESEARCH allows me to ascertain the societal and cultural source of problems that I see and hear in my everyday life–such as the widespread CONSISTENT minimizing and victim blaming and straight up DISBELIEF women’s abuse. I have a logical rationale for my opinion beyond just personal stories about social problems. It’s *ALWAYS* better to do some research and analyze an issue before formulating an opinion about it. The conclusion that *YOU* came to was that some women lie about abuse, and that’s why misogynistic cretins like D.L. Hughley are quick to disbelieve a woman when she claims to be abused. I disagree, but the difference is that have a logical rationale for my opinion, because I did RESEARCH on the subject.

              According to the CDC, this is the societal context that encourages domestic violence: “Traditional gender norms (e.g., women should stay at home, not enter workforce, and be submissive; men support the family and make the decisions)”

              Here’s more context from the New York State Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence: Social norms and unequal distribution of resources (income, education, employment political power, etc.) lead some individuals to feel entitled to control their partner. In heterosexual relationships, the norms and inequality are largely, but not entirely, gender-related.

            • mmmdot

              More societal context via Jane Doe Inc., The Massachusetts Coalition Against Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence:

              *In the case of violence against women, women are targeted because of their gender. Violence against women, sometimes called gender-based violence, specifically perpetuates male power and control, either by intention or effect. Violence against women is sustained by a CULTURE of silence and denial of the seriousness of the abuse, its consequences on the PERSONAL and SOCIAL level, and its use as a tool of domination. 1 out of every 3 women in the WORLD will be
              beaten, r@ped, or otherwise abused during her lifetime. We recognize that ending gender-based violence will mean changing cultural concepts about masculinity, and that process must actively engage men, whether they be policy makers, parents, spouses, or young boys.

              *Sexual and domestic violence and stalking are symptoms of a deeper problem: the oppression of people by virtue of their gender, race, economic class, ethnicity, sexuality, gender identity, religion or other characteristics. People often identify with more than one of these attributes. Ex: a women of color can face discrimination and oppression both because she is a woman and because she is not white. When thinking about a survivor’s experience of sexual or domestic abuse, it’s important to keep in mind that multiple oppressions could be occurring and overlapping at the same time.

              *This means the occurrence of this violence doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Yes, it’s about an INDIVIDUAL’S exertion of power and control over another person using sex and violence as the weapon. BUT it’s also about the way that these forms of violence are used as strategies of power and control of one GROUP over another GROUP as a way to reinforce the status quo. The clearest example is how r@pe is used as a WEAPON in war. In much the same way, sexual and domestic violence reinforces gender roles in our SOCIETY. As such, sexual assault, r@pe, battering, and human trafficking are in fact human rights violations.

            • mmmdot

              Societal context via Jane Doe Inc., The Massachusetts Coalition Against Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence:

              *In the case of violence against women, women are targeted because of their gender. Violence against women, sometimes called gender-based violence, specifically perpetuates male power and control, either by intention or effect. Violence against women is sustained by a CULTURE of silence and denial of the seriousness of the abuse, its consequences on the PERSONAL and SOCIAL level, and its use as a tool of domination. 1 out of every 3 women in the WORLD will be
              beaten, r@ped, or otherwise abused during her lifetime. We recognize that ending gender-based violence will mean changing cultural concepts about masculinity, and that process must actively engage men, whether they be policy makers, parents, spouses, or young boys.

              *Sexual and domestic violence and stalking are symptoms of a deeper problem: the oppression of people by virtue of their gender, race, economic class, ethnicity, sexuality, gender identity, religion or other characteristics. People often identify with more than one of these attributes. Ex: a women of color can face discrimination and oppression both because she is a woman and because she is not white. When thinking about a survivor’s experience of sexual or domestic abuse, it’s important to keep in mind that multiple oppressions could be occurring and overlapping at the same time.

              *This means the occurrence of this violence doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Yes, it’s about an INDIVIDUAL’S exertion of power and control over another person using sex and violence as the weapon. BUT it’s also about the way that these forms of violence are used as strategies of power and control of one GROUP over another GROUP as a way to reinforce the status quo. The clearest example is how r@pe is used as a WEAPON in war. In much the same way, sexual and domestic violence reinforces gender roles in our SOCIETY. As such, sexual assault, r@pe, battering, and human trafficking are in fact human rights violations.

      • Latisha Washington

        Exactly!