Have Several Seats: Celebrities We Don’t Need Relationship Advice From

January 20, 2014  |  
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When it comes to relationship advice from celebrities, most of them are in no position to tell anyone anything about love. Need relationship advice? Not from these celebrities…

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Gabrielle Union

When Gabrielle Union gave women advice on how to know when to leave a man, I almost fell out of my chair. Her list clearly didn’t include “if he’s already married” or “if he has a baby with another woman while you two are ‘on a break'”

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Tami Roman

Tami told Hot 97 that she’s writing a book on relationship advice called “Mistresses 101,” but it sounds like there’ll be more advice on how to beat a man up rather than keep him:

“I’m different in my relationships. I will not put my hands on you but I will cut the f*ck out ya tires.”

Pass.

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Tyrese

“Manology” may be a New York Times Bestseller, but anyone taking Tyrese’s relationship advice is setting themselves up for failure.

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Kenya Moore

Maybe Kenya should focus on maintaining her own relationships before commenting on Peter or Porsha’s situation.

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Mama Joyce

There’s a big difference between meddling and advice.

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Keri Hilson

Keri dropped this pearl of wisdom on her Instagram account. Can someone please tell Keri that the 50’s are over and that a gentleman is a gentleman no matter who he’s dating.

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Chris Brown

Chris took bad relationship advice to another level when he snatched the mic from the DJ at Hollywood’s Emerson Theatre to yell these tips at the audience:

“You GOTTA say that one thing to her … Don’t make me have to tell you again, that’s my p***y baby! … so you better not give it away!”

So every person in this motherf**king building, if you got a bad b!tch you better say that s**t to her, or she might f**k another n***a.”

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J.R. Smith

In case you need a refresher course, J. R. Smith is famous for being an NBA player and cheating on K. Michelle. But after he Instagrammed this grammatically questionable tutorial on how to date an athlete, we can see that K is better off without him.

Image Source: Cosmopolitan.com

Kim Kardashian

We don’t know what Cosmopolitan was thinking, but we don’t know if their readers need relationship advice from someone whose last marriage lasted 72 hours.

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Tara Wallace

It may sound like a bad idea to take relationship advice from one-third of the craziest love triangle on TV, but the world’s most jilted ex actually made sense during a recent interview:

“I’m such a firm believer now in female intuition…I think that you have to go with your gut instinct. When you are unhappy or when you are not getting what you need, you have to act accordingly, not wait around for him to make it right. If you’re not happy in his actions, that’s reason enough for you to leave. That’s a pill that I have to eat myself.”

Unfortunately, her still sleeping with Peter and taking literal pills — as in “two Plan Bs” — sort of knocks her out of the legitimate advice givers realm.

 

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Rihanna

Don’t get me wrong. It was sweet that she reached out to a fan looking for relationship advice. But I still don’t know if the Baijan Bad Gal is the best source for dating tips.

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Steve Harvey

We’ve lost track of how many times he’s been divorced, but we know it’s too many times for a man who makes a living giving people relationship advice.

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Gwenyth Paltrow

Gwen’s relationship advice is just as impractical as the other stuff that comes out of GOOP. Her tried and true relationship rule? Give your husband a BJ whenever he starts an argument or gets upset…it’s that simple. OK girl.

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Keith Sweat

Remember classic Keith Sweat lyrics like “You say no, I say yes. Girl I bet, I can make you sweat” or “Merry go round and round”? Well Keith is recycling all the best quotes from his old hits and turning them into relationship advice published in a new book “Make it Last Forever: the Do’s & Don’ts.” It may be the worst career comeback we’ve ever heard of.

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T-Pain

T-Pain went on Arsenio and revealed to his fans that he kept his 11-year marriage strong by inviting other people into the bedroom. That’s just too much information for me…

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