“We Be All Night — The Marginalization Of One Minute Men:” The 13 Most Hilarious #BeyonceThinkPieces
In case you hadn’t noticed, which we’re sure you have, everyone is taking Beyonce’s latest album a wee bit too seriously. The first time the woman who’s been criticized her entire life for being too private decided to get extra open about her personal and bedroom business, the critics came knocking, calling her everything from a faux feminist to sexually explicit. Some argued Baddie Bey was suddenly telling us too much about her life, while others decided the fact that she was telling her truth and no one else’s was a problem.
Enter Slate’s article, “Hey Mrs. Carter — What About The Gays?,” in which writer Matt Capetola says he feels “slapped in the face by the paucity—no, the patent absence—of explicitly homosexual characters” in Beyonce’s “Haunted” video. Proving that there truly is no limit to doing the absolute most when it comes to reading too far into Beyonce’s work, Capetola scolded Beyonce for the fact that her album “featured not a single unambiguous nod to LGBTQ rights,” as if that was somehow her cross to bear. I’m personally more disturbed that he thought she would.
Either way, Black Twitter got a hold of this article, like everything else, and decided to put forth their own suggestions for nonsensical #BeyonceThinkPieces. Essentially this is what could happen if a grad student somewhere decided to put together a heinously over-thought dissertation based on Beyonce’s basic a** lyrics. And, as usual, it is hilarious.
“Your Breasteses are My Breakfast”: Is Beyonce starving Blue Ivy to feed her husband? #Beyoncethinkpieces
— Andrea Monique (@AndreaMonique) December 18, 2013