Do We Allow Men To Be Vulnerable?

October 20, 2013  |  
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From Essence

Earlier this week Donald Glover (Community, Girls) made headlines after posting pictures on his Instagram of several notes he wrote containing confessions such as, “I’m afraid of the future,” “I’m afraid my parents won’t live long enough to see my kids,” and “I’m afraid people hate who I really am.”

The 30-year-old actor/rapper also posted some of his relationship fears, “I’m afraid my girl will get pregnant at not the exact time we want,” “I’m afraid that she’s still in love with that dude.”

In addition to writing about his fears, Glover also posted several confessions, one being, “I’ve been sick this year. I’ve seen a bunch of people die this year. This is the first time I’ve felt helpless. But I’m not on that.”


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  • Kristen

    We all know that keeping things in can actually make things worse. I’d rather a man be vulnerable and open to his fears than trying to pretend and lashing out at anyone that doesn’t know what’s going on.

  • Love em

    I love Donald Glover vulnerability, and relate to him on many levels.

    Nerdy black girl and nerdy black guys have a lot in common lol!

  • Keland

    I don’t control the way men express themselves.

  • Guest

    Gee I didn’t know men supposed to have feelings. They’re human just like us women and I’ll respect a man who can show his feelings, I’ll trust him more than anyone who fake a feeling. My husband cried when he lost his truck driving job 6 years ago, he was gonna hide his tears from me because he thought I would judge him, I told him to cry it out and things will get better. Now he’s an IT instructor at a college and he loves it. It’s that thug culture that have men thinking if they show emotion they are either gay or soft and weak. Also some of these women need to stop calling these men weak for being human as well.

    • Guest

      *Gee I didn’t know men DON’T supposed to have feelings.

    • Herm Cain

      Your husband sounds like a B.A.N has he ever experienced poverty or death things worth crying for loss of a job c’mon most woman don’t cry over that

      • Guest

        He was making good money off that truck driving job and I had to take a second job to help pay the mortgage and the bills while he was looking for work, and as a real wife, I helped my husband get back on his feet and he did. What’s next, my husband ain’t allowed to drink water either? Plus my hubby grew up on welfare and in the projects when I first met him so yeah he grew up in poverty, so STFU and go buy empathy!

        • Dina

          Girl, forget him, your husband is blessed to have a woman like you to help him out while he’s down. I would do the same for my husband.

      • Dina

        Her husband doesn’t have a right to be depressed about a lost job? There are people who lost their job, even years ago and still looking for work and get depressed about not having a job that they resort to killing family and committing suicide for financial. So before you judge her husband, understand first, oh wait, you’re a troll, you have no heart. Her husband is human!

        • MsLadyE

          You said THAT right! ANYBODY who is struggling with any kind of loss has a right to grieve and be depressed about their loss. And they have every right to be vulnerable, show their emotions, and cry if they need to. It’s much healthier than turning to alcohol, drugs, gambling, violence, unprotected sex, shopping, or overeating to ease their pain.

    • ChiTown Princess

      Good to know your husband is back on his feet and has a loving wife to support him.

  • delora

    Men are human. They’re allowed to feel vulnerable and scared. No wonder so many women on this site are single.

    • coolyfett

      You can also say the same thing about American prisons and what race of men populates them.

  • hollyw

    As a whole, we probably don’t. I personally have a hard time experiencing vulnerability in anyone, male or female. Makes me queasy. I try to make an exception for boyfriends; however it can be pretty hard when 9x out of 10, they only expose their vulnerable sides moments after saying or doing something completely out of line and/or sexist, ijs…

  • bluekissess

    Here’s the rest of the article In addition to writing about his fears, Glover also posted several confessions, one being, “I’ve been sick this year. I’ve seen a bunch of people die this year. This is the first time I’ve felt helpless. But I’m not on that.”

    Glover’s posts have been labeled in the press as troubling, dark, and some question if it’s a cry for help or signs of depression. But in an interview with PEOPLE yesterday he said, “If I’m depressed, everybody’s depressed,” he says. “I don’t think those feelings are that different from what everybody’s feeling. Most people just don’t tell everybody.”

    While we agree that many men can probably relate to some Glover’s fears, we wonder what you think about them expressing it. How do you feel when a man shows his vulnerability? Do you welcome it? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.

    • bluekissess

      Slyvia obell is the author. Watch this gets deleted lol

      • Let It Be

        Wait so the link to Essence wasn’t originally there? I was wondering what exactly this had to do with vulnerability. He shared that these are the thoughts of many which is true. Hmmm.

        • bluekissess

          When I clicked the link I thought it would be a lengthy in depth article but it just quoted what he said in another interview. Time wasting so I just copied what was said on link.

      • bvictorian

        We have a link partnership with Essence which is why there are hyperlinks directing you to the rest of the article on their site. Please do not copy and paste content from our partners and post it like this again.

        • bluekissess

          To bad this was a useless article. Make sure you delete the pyramid schemes that people post or the sexiest punks who purposely talk down to black women. I was called a mut and a h0e yesterday on this “friendly forum” those comments aren’t deleted. I can copy and paste what I want I cited the author which isn’t plagiarism

        • Chachi

          Girl Bye! Grow some eyebrows. Please and Thank you. Bless…